I don’t see a problem with the age gap. I think a 26 year old med student is quite different than a 26 year old HS grad who works at Denny’s.

I’ll offer this anecdote:

I’m a 33 year old woman, divorced, with two small children. I work and go to graduate school. My plate is FULL. One of my dearest friends is a 24 year old woman. We have a ton of fun together and enjoy each other’s company.

That said, I am not under the illusion that we are peers. She’s finding herself, living with her parents, about to move overseas. She has no financial obligations. Her only responsibility is to herself. Much of this is generally true for people around her age. Not so for people around my age - our responsibilities multiply and our worlds widen. So while I don’t think the 35 year old man in the OP is doing anything weird or creepy, it’s just factual that he and the woman he’s dating are in very different places in their lives. At 45 and 34? Significantly less so.

Anonymous wrote:What? Guy husband works?! Is she an affair?!

I know. I wish posters would check titles for grammar.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Six years out of high school. Y’all are pervs.

In the age of female empowerment, can you please tell me when my daughters will be old enough to make their own dating decisions? I didn't know they were such mental simpletons that they are prey to white collar successful men well into their 20s.

The woman speaking to the power imbalance stated it well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cool. He can pay off her $200k ugrad loans and $400k med school loans and maybe she can make over $30k a year in 6-8 years time. Good deal. He can also be 45 yo when she is finally ready to have kids and not be working 80 hours a week.

This is exhibit A of the jealousy that others are talking about. There is nothing remotely odd about the age difference of 35-24, and the haters are insecure women and jealous men. I assume there are far more of the former than the latter.

Actually it’s a great point about the student loans and when the woman will be able to start a family.

Anonymous wrote:Six years out of high school. Y’all are pervs.

In the age of female empowerment, can you please tell me when my daughters will be old enough to make their own dating decisions? I didn't know they were such mental simpletons that they are prey to white collar successful men well into their 20s.

Anonymous wrote:I was the younger woman once. At the time I felt it was nbd, after all I was an adult. We seemed similarly matched, etc. looking back at my 23 yr.-old self, I had no idea what I was doing. There was a power imbalance in that relationship. It was emotionally abusive, I was financially beholden, and I stayed too long because of those things. It’s just one anecdote, and a lot of other young women have it together better than I did, but perhaps that’s why these age mismatches give some people pause.

This is sometimes, but not always the case. When I was 21, I dated a newly minted tenure-track professor, then 32 (same age difference highlighted in the OP). Tremendous power imbalance, borne mostly of the disparity in life experiences. You just don’t know what you don’t know at that age.

Anonymous wrote:I was the younger woman once. At the time I felt it was nbd, after all I was an adult. We seemed similarly matched, etc. looking back at my 23 yr.-old self, I had no idea what I was doing. There was a power imbalance in that relationship. It was emotionally abusive, I was financially beholden, and I stayed too long because of those things. It’s just one anecdote, and a lot of other young women have it together better than I did, but perhaps that’s why these age mismatches give some people pause.

This is a good point. I have a buddy from college who often dates younger. He says he likes that they don't have their own money. I've heard him say it twice now, and I find it...weird.

I was the younger woman once. At the time I felt it was nbd, after all I was an adult. We seemed similarly matched, etc. looking back at my 23 yr.-old self, I had no idea what I was doing. There was a power imbalance in that relationship. It was emotionally abusive, I was financially beholden, and I stayed too long because of those things. It’s just one anecdote, and a lot of other young women have it together better than I did, but perhaps that’s why these age mismatches give some people pause.

Anonymous wrote:It's the year of hating all things men.

Oh yeah that's it. I got the secret signal to spend this year hating men. ~sheesh
Feel sorry for yourself much?

Six years out of high school. Y’all are pervs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guessing there is something about the guy that brings this on, the teasing. He's a player. He's not respected.

+1

He probably has a history of dating significantly younger women. Most of those guys are immature and usually controlling.

Are you inferring a 24 year old woman isn't capable of making her own dating decisions? And any high status man who dates physical and reproductive prime women must be defective? Sweetie, it's biology.

It's simply a matter of the prettier/younger the gal, the more likely she can secure a mature, financially secure male. And vice versa. She can date flakey, broke and in debt classmates for the next six years or she can have a proven, financially secure mate now, in her physical prime.

I met my husband in college, but many of my sorority sisters who didn't dated and sometimes married men who were five to 12 years older. My own parents were 10 years apart and it's no big deal. We're not talking 20 or 30 years diff here.

And every 35-year-old guy at the wedding wishes they were hitting a 24-year-old and that body. And a smart one at that given that she's in med school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cool. He can pay off her $200k ugrad loans and $400k med school loans and maybe she can make over $30k a year in 6-8 years time. Good deal. He can also be 45 yo when she is finally ready to have kids and not be working 80 hours a week.

This is exhibit A of the jealousy that others are talking about. There is nothing remotely odd about the age difference of 35-24, and the haters are insecure women and jealous men. I assume there are far more of the former than the latter.

Reading comprehension? You’re talking about age yet the post you’re responding to was talking about 10 years of student debt and the med student life cycle.
F for AP english for you.

Considering weddings cost $100-200 per guest in variable costs plus the fixed costs like band, venue, decorations, bringing a 25 yo to her first non-family wedding ever as a guest had better mean it’s serious!
I wouldn’t want my guests bringing tinder rando’s to my wedding, we had to cull the aggregate guest lists enough as it was!!