Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 11:59     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:The parents in Arlington have been miserable every time my DCC has had to play against them. Complain incessantly about every single call.


Complaining about calls? That happens at every club.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 11:54     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Never had a problem with co-Arlington parents either, super friendly. Definitely loud on side-lines, but not louder than the other teams we play. Compared to rec basketball parents, they are saints.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 11:49     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


Unbelievable. Assume Arlington as well.


NP relatively new to travel soccer in NOVA. Earlier in the thread, there were complaints about coaches treating some of their players poorly. No one assumed that the club was Arlington. But lots of people seem to assume the difficult parents are at Arlington. Is that an accurate (if over broad) read on Arlington - the coaches are fine but the parents aren't?


Yeah, the parents are pretty bad at Arlington.


It's the top team / DA / ECNL parents of any club that are bad, not just Arlington - Looking at you Loudoun / McLean / Bethesda. Most are former players, coaches, college players, etc... Makes it a real disincentive to have my kid on a top team since the parents are yelling at their own kids but also criticizing and telling my kid what they did wrong and where to make the play. I want my kid to learn by making mistakes and listening to the coach- not being controlled by the joystick sidelines crowd.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 11:48     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


Unbelievable. Assume Arlington as well.


NP relatively new to travel soccer in NOVA. Earlier in the thread, there were complaints about coaches treating some of their players poorly. No one assumed that the club was Arlington. But lots of people seem to assume the difficult parents are at Arlington. Is that an accurate (if over broad) read on Arlington - the coaches are fine but the parents aren't?


Yeah, the parents are pretty bad at Arlington.


The parents in Arlington have been miserable every time my DCC has had to play against them. Complain incessantly about every single call.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 11:46     Subject: Re:May - the month no one talks to each other
In my time at Arlington the parents have been fine.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 11:38     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


Unbelievable. Assume Arlington as well.


NP relatively new to travel soccer in NOVA. Earlier in the thread, there were complaints about coaches treating some of their players poorly. No one assumed that the club was Arlington. But lots of people seem to assume the difficult parents are at Arlington. Is that an accurate (if over broad) read on Arlington - the coaches are fine but the parents aren't?


Yeah, the parents are pretty bad at Arlington.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 11:35     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


Unbelievable. Assume Arlington as well.


NP relatively new to travel soccer in NOVA. Earlier in the thread, there were complaints about coaches treating some of their players poorly. No one assumed that the club was Arlington. But lots of people seem to assume the difficult parents are at Arlington. Is that an accurate (if over broad) read on Arlington - the coaches are fine but the parents aren't?
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 10:30     Subject: Re:May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:I see a lot of the parents defining their own value whether their kid makes the A or B team (i.e. red or blue; Green or white; etc.). My son after 2 years of travel decided it was no longer fun the committment and politics of the coaches ( he had 3 coaches in 2 years). He was U13 this current season in NCSL.

This year at tryouts kids were trying out to move up and kids in the upper team were going to be sent down as the club was reshuffling NCSL and CLL team. I believe it is because NCSL coach (ours) is moving to the CCL team next year and wanted to hand pick his players from both tams and demote the ones he did not care for. Some parents were acting like it wsa a badge of honor to make the CCL team after playing NCSL this year. When their kid made it they were beaming as though they themselves made the team. Like 2 parents cared that my son was not trying out ("we will miss you guys next year") because I feel in the other parents mind it opened up a spot or something.

I will miss the kids and parents on game days but not the bullshit that surrounds the coaching and those acting like our little travel team is guaranteeing our kids a spot on UVA in 5 years. My son is more obsessed with basketball and I dread the basketball parents if he plays travel hoops haha.


There's a difference between defining your own value in your child's success and being happy because your child is happy to be improving or succeeding. And I'm not sure why it matters to you whether people care that your son is trying out or not. In fact, it kind of sounds like some of your identity was wrapped up in your son's participation in travel soccer, which is precisely what you are accusing others of.
Anonymous
Post 05/16/2019 10:24     Subject: Re:May - the month no one talks to each other
I see a lot of the parents defining their own value whether their kid makes the A or B team (i.e. red or blue; Green or white; etc.). My son after 2 years of travel decided it was no longer fun the committment and politics of the coaches ( he had 3 coaches in 2 years). He was U13 this current season in NCSL.

This year at tryouts kids were trying out to move up and kids in the upper team were going to be sent down as the club was reshuffling NCSL and CLL team. I believe it is because NCSL coach (ours) is moving to the CCL team next year and wanted to hand pick his players from both tams and demote the ones he did not care for. Some parents were acting like it wsa a badge of honor to make the CCL team after playing NCSL this year. When their kid made it they were beaming as though they themselves made the team. Like 2 parents cared that my son was not trying out ("we will miss you guys next year") because I feel in the other parents mind it opened up a spot or something.

I will miss the kids and parents on game days but not the bullshit that surrounds the coaching and those acting like our little travel team is guaranteeing our kids a spot on UVA in 5 years. My son is more obsessed with basketball and I dread the basketball parents if he plays travel hoops haha.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 17:38     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:A lot of parents are nuts for a few years when their kid is on a team that wins all the time at the ulittle ages. When the team starts playing against even competition, games are 50/50 and the bubble is burst.. parents get a reality check and maybe learn to chill out.


I agree, but for the opposite reason.

The reason some of the parents go crazy about which team their kid makes is that many of the parents hate winning all the time and want more competitive games.

Top teams get the most competitive games throughout the season and at tournaments, which is great for emotional and skill development.

That is why parents go a little crazy about which team their kid is on - they want the bubble burst and 50/50 games at an early age.

Good 2nd teams rarely face similar competition at ulittle, and their kids are not learning to thrive under pressure - an important life lesson is missing.

We need Promotion / Relegation at uLittles.


+100 --- failure to have this model implemented at this level is why the US continues to lag the world at soccer!
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 15:33     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:A lot of parents are nuts for a few years when their kid is on a team that wins all the time at the ulittle ages. When the team starts playing against even competition, games are 50/50 and the bubble is burst.. parents get a reality check and maybe learn to chill out.


I've definitely seen this happen, especially when the kids on the team are the parents' oldest children. One other common dynamic in that situation is that the parents whose kids are on the bottom end of the roster talk a lot about how the team is so great because of the team chemistry so it's important that no new kids are added and no kids are dropped. The parents of the starters are often strangely noncommittal in these conversations.


You’re so spot on! So true.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 13:11     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:A lot of parents are nuts for a few years when their kid is on a team that wins all the time at the ulittle ages. When the team starts playing against even competition, games are 50/50 and the bubble is burst.. parents get a reality check and maybe learn to chill out.


I agree, but for the opposite reason.

The reason some of the parents go crazy about which team their kid makes is that many of the parents hate winning all the time and want more competitive games.

Top teams get the most competitive games throughout the season and at tournaments, which is great for emotional and skill development.

That is why parents go a little crazy about which team their kid is on - they want the bubble burst and 50/50 games at an early age.

Good 2nd teams rarely face similar competition at ulittle, and their kids are not learning to thrive under pressure - an important life lesson is missing.

We need Promotion / Relegation at uLittles.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 12:51     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:A lot of parents are nuts for a few years when their kid is on a team that wins all the time at the ulittle ages. When the team starts playing against even competition, games are 50/50 and the bubble is burst.. parents get a reality check and maybe learn to chill out.


I've definitely seen this happen, especially when the kids on the team are the parents' oldest children. One other common dynamic in that situation is that the parents whose kids are on the bottom end of the roster talk a lot about how the team is so great because of the team chemistry so it's important that no new kids are added and no kids are dropped. The parents of the starters are often strangely noncommittal in these conversations.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 12:29     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
A lot of parents are nuts for a few years when their kid is on a team that wins all the time at the ulittle ages. When the team starts playing against even competition, games are 50/50 and the bubble is burst.. parents get a reality check and maybe learn to chill out.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2019 12:05     Subject: May - the month no one talks to each other
Anonymous wrote:At a club's CCL tryout, a mom whose DC is currently on that club's CCL team greeted me with "Hey, why are you here?" My DC also plays in the same club but on a NCSL team. There were so many things I wanted to say back to her but I ended up just smiled and said "same reason you are here." I know she probably didn't mean to be rude but I was annoyed by her comment.


I think it was a thoughtless slip of the tongue. Some parents who have kids on a top team and know their children will stay on a top team seem to think of the tryouts as practices. I think she saw you and was just thinking your child is not on her child's team. I wouldn't read too much in to it.