Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 21:34     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, have you thought about directing her to one of the Catholic-operated homes from pregnant teens? Clearly she won't get an abortion there, but she will get decent prenatal care, food, shelter, education, adoption counseling, and stuff to help her get set up with the baby if she decides to keep it. I think once a kid has decided that abortion is off the table, it's a pretty good option. And its waaaay better than living in a housing project with her ex's parents, especially where it sounds like the ex (if they even dated) is not in the picture. Once she's someplace stable and clean, adoption might start to make more sense to her and, if not, they can get her set up with all the right social services, a mentor, and other supports.

+1


+ 1000

OP, I think, deep down, you know this is for the best, though of course I understand your first emotions. You love her very much and want the best for her. Is there anything any of us can do to help? Is she local? I am sorry if I missed that.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 21:07     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
I think she wants the child to be her new family, she feels lonely and wants someone to call her own. It is a very common scenario for lost young souls.
Can you get her into counseling under a pretext of being a better parent and maybe they can show her alternative ways of filling the void? She will be disappointed in this “baby and I are two souls together forever” thing very soon! The baby will be dumped on you op
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 20:58     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:Only a fool would adopt the child of a drug addicted mother. I know a family who did and their life was Hell. She should terminate this pregnancy and have her tubes tied so she won't get pregnant again.


You are scum and I feel sorry for your children.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 20:15     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:OP, have you thought about directing her to one of the Catholic-operated homes from pregnant teens? Clearly she won't get an abortion there, but she will get decent prenatal care, food, shelter, education, adoption counseling, and stuff to help her get set up with the baby if she decides to keep it. I think once a kid has decided that abortion is off the table, it's a pretty good option. And its waaaay better than living in a housing project with her ex's parents, especially where it sounds like the ex (if they even dated) is not in the picture. Once she's someplace stable and clean, adoption might start to make more sense to her and, if not, they can get her set up with all the right social services, a mentor, and other supports.

+1
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 19:54     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
OP, have you thought about directing her to one of the Catholic-operated homes from pregnant teens? Clearly she won't get an abortion there, but she will get decent prenatal care, food, shelter, education, adoption counseling, and stuff to help her get set up with the baby if she decides to keep it. I think once a kid has decided that abortion is off the table, it's a pretty good option. And its waaaay better than living in a housing project with her ex's parents, especially where it sounds like the ex (if they even dated) is not in the picture. Once she's someplace stable and clean, adoption might start to make more sense to her and, if not, they can get her set up with all the right social services, a mentor, and other supports.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 19:38     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My addict teenage goddaughter is pregnant and says she plans on keeping the baby.

The “plan” is so ludicrous I can’t even begin to outline it bc it sounds almost like it’s made up. But she plans on moving in with the fathers family in their housing project apartment even though the father isn’t in the picture.

With everything else going on that’s like one of the more thought out aspects of this. It’s so so bad.

I talked to her for an hour tonight trying to show her why she needs to get an abortion. I told her about how expensive it all is, how insane being a parent is, I told her that the sadness of an abortion is peanuts compared to the sadness of looking at your child and knowing your faults are affecting them irreversibly.

I am also paralyzed bc although I could avoid it, I see a very clear path ahead where this baby ends up with me. Maybe not forever but this could impact my family considerably.

I’m just freaking out and I need some perspective. Please be kind. Is there any angle of this I could/should take with her to ensure I’ve done everything I can to salvage this situation. She has got to get an abortion. I need to tread so carefully.


“Please be kind.” Says the person encouraging someone to kill their unborn child.


Thank god we still have the freedom in this country for safe and legal abortions. I just donated to Planned Parenthood today. Now you run along.


For those that CHOOSE them. This woman is CHOOSING not to have one. Shouldn't that CHOICE be honored and respected? Or is it only worthy when someone is choosing YOUR way?


THIS
THIS
THIS

Welcome to DCUM, home of the most self centered a-holes this side of the Mississippi.


Not knowing the nature of this woman's addiction, if its opiods and I had the choice between being her child or never being born, I'd honestly pick never being born. The level of neglect those children go through is horrific, its not like an emotionally volatile alcoholic (which is awful in its own right) - its a full inability to care about or meet the child's basic needs for clean diapers, food, and a safe environment - much less a loving and nurturing one. Have you all not heard the 1000s of stories of the baby that died due to maggot infestations after being left in a dirty diaper in a swing for 7 days, the malnourished kids who have picked through neighbors trashcans b/c no one is feeding them, the sobbing children trapped in a car seat with the parents passed out in the drivers seat? If its this type of addiction, I too would be pushing for an abortion in the best interest of the potential child.


PP here, and I’m a prosecutor, and believe me there are plenty of children born into “normal” households who are neglected and abused. Frankly, I see more incest and sexual abuse of children by non-drug-addicted parents. For every case you reference, I’ve seen success stories too. It’s not so black and white as you would like it to be from your ivory tower.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 19:28     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Do not pressure or coerce someone to get an abortion! What is wrong with you?
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 15:56     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:Be there for your goddaughter even if you don’t agree with her choice to keep this baby. By the way, if you are a Catholic godmother you should know well that pushing for an abortion is a very grave sin. If you cannot help her and she wants to keep her baby please at least contact Project Gabriel, they could help with some basic necessities and maybe encourage her to get help for her addiction. There is always hope and often kids born from addicted mothers don’t have long term health issues.



+ Very strange story. How sad for this young troubled woman has had to suffer this trauma. In which faith does the godmother advocate for abortion? If you cannot support her in her choice to carry the baby (and possibly give it up for adoption), please connect her with religious/social agencies that will help her with her situation and her addiction. Do not feel obligated to raise the child. But do not convince her to abort; it's not your "choice." It's hers.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 15:45     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
I got an abortion when I was 16 and dating a loser from the projects. At the time I was soooo in looooove (eye roll here) and tried to get pregnant on purpose. I didn’t tell my mom I was pregnant, my doctor called my mom and told her (not sure that’s allowed???). I refused to get an abortion and finally my Mom told me I’d get zero help if I went through with it so I got the abortion. By then I was 5 month pregant and had to go to Canada because in Quebec you could get a late term abortion. I’m 39 now, unmarried, no kids and have zero regrets. I don’t actually think I even want kids and the only thing I’d change was waiting so long to listen to my Mom.

Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 15:22     Subject: Re:Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
People! Please do not feed the troll. Smh
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 14:56     Subject: Re:Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
I am pro choice BUT I am also catholic (yes its true, we exist) and God parents are suppose to support their God children spiritually. Convincing her to have an abortion is kind of the opposite, no? I am all about setting out clear choices but beyond that you should really step back. I also agree that addressing the addition needs to be the main focus right now.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 14:53     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:So she’s an adult who wants to keep her baby. Instead of trying to convince her to abort, how about you be supportive of what could possibly be the biggest decision of her life? It needs to be her choice not yours. She will hate you the rest of her life if you talk her into doing something she doesn’t want to do.

Yes!!!!
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 14:51     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:Why would the baby wind up with you rather than with its grandparents?

Also, I was a teenage mom twice. My life did not end. My children (and I) are college educated and thriving and healthy. Worse things have happened.
+1
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 14:43     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Be there for your goddaughter even if you don’t agree with her choice to keep this baby. By the way, if you are a Catholic godmother you should know well that pushing for an abortion is a very grave sin. If you cannot help her and she wants to keep her baby please at least contact Project Gabriel, they could help with some basic necessities and maybe encourage her to get help for her addiction. There is always hope and often kids born from addicted mothers don’t have long term health issues.
Anonymous
Post 01/21/2019 14:05     Subject: Wrecked over goddaughters pregnancy
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would refer her to Planned Parenthood. They will help her with whatever choice she decides to pursue.



Haha. Right.


^ Spoken like somebody who has never set foot in a Planned Parenthood.


Bc I’m sure you go there for all your pregnancies right? They aren’t exactly known for their high quality OB care. In fact I would be shocked if they even offer OB care at all of the PPs.



The one near me does.