OP, I am married to a (now retired) cop. He always wanted to be a cop, his life was being a cop, he absolutely loved it. He was always a patrol officer, always wanted to be on the street, never wanted to do anything else.

In the early years of dating, I worried about safety.

Now, looking back, I'll give you my perspective.

A lot has to do with where you live. My husband was a cop first in New Hampshire, and let me tell you, that was a whole lot of boring. A big exciting night was catching someone who tried to break into the Long John Silver. Most of the time was driving around, making traffic stops. The most dangerous calls were domestics (they're the most dangerous of all calls anywhere). But it was usually super drunk or drugged out people and only occasionally did he feel like he was in a life threatening situation.

We moved to a larger city, and his role was much more dangerous. His patrol beat was the drug corridor, and every night was more dangerous than when we were in NH. You get really used to it, because its just life. Most of what I remember from back then was how GROSS it was when he came home. All night long he's in these disgusting houses, crawling with roaches, and fighting with really gross people, and I literally made him strip in our garage and take a shower in the basement before he could come upstairs. He would be fighting with super drugged out people, the meth heads were the worst because they just don't feel pain so it's like fighting a superhero. They don't feel tasers, nothing. So he would constantly come home all bruised and battered. I felt badly for him, but he didn't seem to be phased by it.

The thing is, cops seem to be born. They just always wanted to be cops, and you aren't going to change it. The worst thing about being married to a cop isnt so much the danger, to me at least. The worst thing is the really awful hours, combined with the really low pay--which require them to always pick up as many overtime hours as possible to support a family. And that means, if you have kids, quite a lot of the time is being like a single mother. Now, if they eventually decide to get off the street patrol scene and do detective, that is a lot easier (hours wise, although the pay can still suck depending on location).

Bottom line, you don't have a lot of say here, and so if it's a deal breaker for you just thinking about it, I'd walk. Its a lot harder to deal with over a long period of time, and if you are already hesitant, it won't work long term.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Amen. Lots of cop haters here.
Not a dangerous profession? How about the school resource officer in yesterday’s news? He chased an armed student, who had already fired his weapon and shot a fellow student, out of the school while he, the cop, was being shot at. He returned fire, wounded the suspect, and undoubtedly saved lives.
I remember when school resource officers had easy, safe jobs. Often these positions were assigned to older cops who were close to retirement. Not any more.
LEO’s are in a very dangerous line of work. Haters be damned.

Nice anecdote. Here are stats. #14. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/careers/2018/01/09/workplace-fatalities-25-most-dangerous-jobs-america/1002500001/

What I always say is that farm equipments, structural buildings, logs, etc. that's supposed to be more dangerous don't talk and fight back when you are making arrests. Criminals do. That's what makes this for an intense work environment. You also learn quickly about life when you are arresting all kinds of people for criminal actions - judges, doctors, lawyers, priests... We've seen 'em all.

It's stressful, sure. So are a lot of other jobs with way more accountability.

Health care, education, etc.

This is a weird conversation with people who know nothing about the profession. It's like someone badgering that doctors are all in it for the money, for prescription kickbacks, blah blah blah. Except that most people don't really care why doctors went into the medical field. People Seem to have a strong feeling about cops though. The only difference is cops can retire with their income pretty much intact with a 20 years of service. There seems to be a strong feeling among little minds on here who feel they are somehow paying for all these.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Amen. Lots of cop haters here.
Not a dangerous profession? How about the school resource officer in yesterday’s news? He chased an armed student, who had already fired his weapon and shot a fellow student, out of the school while he, the cop, was being shot at. He returned fire, wounded the suspect, and undoubtedly saved lives.
I remember when school resource officers had easy, safe jobs. Often these positions were assigned to older cops who were close to retirement. Not any more.
LEO’s are in a very dangerous line of work. Haters be damned.

Nice anecdote. Here are stats. #14. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/careers/2018/01/09/workplace-fatalities-25-most-dangerous-jobs-america/1002500001/

What I always say is that farm equipments, structural buildings, logs, etc. that's supposed to be more dangerous don't talk and fight back when you are making arrests. Criminals do. That's what makes this for an intense work environment. You also learn quickly about life when you are arresting all kinds of people for criminal actions - judges, doctors, lawyers, priests... We've seen 'em all.

It's stressful, sure. So are a lot of other jobs with way more accountability.

Health care, education, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Amen. Lots of cop haters here.
Not a dangerous profession? How about the school resource officer in yesterday’s news? He chased an armed student, who had already fired his weapon and shot a fellow student, out of the school while he, the cop, was being shot at. He returned fire, wounded the suspect, and undoubtedly saved lives.
I remember when school resource officers had easy, safe jobs. Often these positions were assigned to older cops who were close to retirement. Not any more.
LEO’s are in a very dangerous line of work. Haters be damned.

Nice anecdote. Here are stats. #14. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/careers/2018/01/09/workplace-fatalities-25-most-dangerous-jobs-america/1002500001/

NP. So weird, I don’t see “online forum keyboard warrior” up there above cops.

Immaterial.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Amen. Lots of cop haters here.
Not a dangerous profession? How about the school resource officer in yesterday’s news? He chased an armed student, who had already fired his weapon and shot a fellow student, out of the school while he, the cop, was being shot at. He returned fire, wounded the suspect, and undoubtedly saved lives.
I remember when school resource officers had easy, safe jobs. Often these positions were assigned to older cops who were close to retirement. Not any more.
LEO’s are in a very dangerous line of work. Haters be damned.

Nice anecdote. Here are stats. #14. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/careers/2018/01/09/workplace-fatalities-25-most-dangerous-jobs-america/1002500001/

What I always say is that farm equipments, structural buildings, logs, etc. that's supposed to be more dangerous don't talk and fight back when you are making arrests. Criminals do. That's what makes this for an intense work environment. You also learn quickly about life when you are arresting all kinds of people for criminal actions - judges, doctors, lawyers, priests... We've seen 'em all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Amen. Lots of cop haters here.
Not a dangerous profession? How about the school resource officer in yesterday’s news? He chased an armed student, who had already fired his weapon and shot a fellow student, out of the school while he, the cop, was being shot at. He returned fire, wounded the suspect, and undoubtedly saved lives.
I remember when school resource officers had easy, safe jobs. Often these positions were assigned to older cops who were close to retirement. Not any more.
LEO’s are in a very dangerous line of work. Haters be damned.

Nice anecdote. Here are stats. #14. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/careers/2018/01/09/workplace-fatalities-25-most-dangerous-jobs-america/1002500001/

NP. So weird, I don’t see “online forum keyboard warrior” up there above cops.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not date or marry anyone who has to have a gun for a living.

Op here and yes that’s also a concern of mine. I don’t like guns

Then you're not a good match for each other, OP. Cut your losses now and let him go live his life. He will always resent you for "preventing" him from pursuing his dream. And if he does, you will nag him about it til the day he quits. Just stop and wish each other well and move on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Amen. Lots of cop haters here.
Not a dangerous profession? How about the school resource officer in yesterday’s news? He chased an armed student, who had already fired his weapon and shot a fellow student, out of the school while he, the cop, was being shot at. He returned fire, wounded the suspect, and undoubtedly saved lives.
I remember when school resource officers had easy, safe jobs. Often these positions were assigned to older cops who were close to retirement. Not any more.
LEO’s are in a very dangerous line of work. Haters be damned.

Nice anecdote. Here are stats. #14. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/careers/2018/01/09/workplace-fatalities-25-most-dangerous-jobs-america/1002500001/

Anonymous wrote:
You don’t get a say except to support him. He should dump you ASAP.

Bingo

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend wants to become a cop and I honestly don’t like the idea of that. He’s currently a security guard for target and got the job because his friend told him they needed someone. He’s been there for 10 months. Now his friends (one of them quit target and the other works at target still) are security guards at private patrol companies and they want to become cops as well.
He’s been going to school for criminal justice but always said he wants to be a detective. I’m just worried because I know how hard and dangerous being a cop can be. He went to take an exam already and if he passed, they will email him and the next step is background. I guess I’m just posting to see if anyone has been in a similar situation with a loved one wanting to become a cop. Although it worries me, this might be something he enjoys to do and I want him to have a job that he likes to do.

Women are dream killers

Anonymous wrote:Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Amen. Lots of cop haters here.
Not a dangerous profession? How about the school resource officer in yesterday’s news? He chased an armed student, who had already fired his weapon and shot a fellow student, out of the school while he, the cop, was being shot at. He returned fire, wounded the suspect, and undoubtedly saved lives.
I remember when school resource officers had easy, safe jobs. Often these positions were assigned to older cops who were close to retirement. Not any more.
LEO’s are in a very dangerous line of work. Haters be damned.

Lots of haters on here from couch potatoes who know nothing about the profession.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It can be dangerous, but probably not as dangerous as you think.

Let him get a couple years in, then push him towards federal law enforcement. Better pay, better benefits, easier work.

Disagree completely. It’s every bit as dangerous as you fear. Anything can happen at any time.
Cops are targets and there is very little fear or respect for the profession anymore.
OP, you’re right to be concerned. It’s not a good life.

bullshit. The majority of cops who get killed crash motorcycles.

Thank you https://www.quora.com/How-dangerous-is-it-to-be-a-police-officer-in-the-U-S

OP is in Los Angeles. This is not a sleepy town where there's no action. Anyway, the job is stressful and dangerous. Your job is to go into high intensity, high stress situations and diffuse them. A wrong move in those high stress situations could mean you are killed, seriously injured, or someone else is killed or injured.

So you think that LAPD aren't primarily killed in non-chase crashes? Or you're just trying to glorify police

Let's just say I've seen private sector employees joining LE but rarely do I see LE people jumping ship to the private sector. Not all private sector employees want to become LEOs, of course. But rarely do I see LEOs joining the private sector until they retire.

I mean there are a lot of potential reasons for that I am narrowly focused on this overhyped claim that being an LEO is particularly dangerous.

LEOs are required to be armed.

That doesn't prove its danger. That just proves how much our country loves guns.

Anonymous wrote:^ having an affair isn’t illegal.

There's your answer.

^ having an affair isn’t illegal.