wow, OP, I would be incensed and very concerned. Yes, it is possible that work became toxic and it was better to quit without a job, but it is NOT OKAY to do it unilaterally! No way! Especially if she is having a hard time, she needs to communicate, you need to brainstorm a transition. I really do wonder, like some of the other posters, if there is something else going on that she refuses to disclose. If not, wow, she is incredibly selfish and acting like a single person, not married and parent.

fwiw, DH went through a horrible period at a job about 6 years ago. He was miserable, it was abusive, and there were times that I wondered if he should just quit for his own mental health. But he was conscious of sticking it out until he got a new job, talked to me, and we worked through it. Now, i'm in a similar position--dislike my job, feel demoralized, etc, But I can't just quit. So we are working on plans about next steps as I look for a new job. If DH did something like your wife did, I would really seriously wonder about what else he was hiding.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. She announced her notice. They actually want her to stay but she's not budging.

I am sorry your wife is so selfish and doesn't think such major decisions should be made together. This sounds like the result of too many Oprah Winfrey shows where "I" come first and "I" have to do what makes me happy. Quite frankly I think the problem is that so many people lack gratitude for what they have and what is good in their lives and just want more of something, in your wife's case, more of me, me, me and the hell with the rest. Well, she is going to find out that the world just isn't sunshine and flowers no matter in which job or situation she ends.

Good grief, your soapbox is just annoying. I was harassed for over a year at a job. I quit with my husband's permission, but I could not have held out any longer. Sometimes work places become unbearably toxic.

I don't understand your post at all. First of all, wife doesn't need husband's permission to quit or do anything, but certainly both spouses should talk about life changing and significant decisions. Most likely this OP would have supported his wife's decision if she talked to him about it. You sound like an insecure and weak person, first you were harassed and then you quit with your husband's permission? Really? What country/century are you from?

OP, are your kids very young? Do you have an infant? Is it possible that your wife is exhausted and worn ragged trying to juggle a job with very young kids and housework and everything else that's expected of moms these days?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. She announced her notice. They actually want her to stay but she's not budging.

I am sorry your wife is so selfish and doesn't think such major decisions should be made together. This sounds like the result of too many Oprah Winfrey shows where "I" come first and "I" have to do what makes me happy. Quite frankly I think the problem is that so many people lack gratitude for what they have and what is good in their lives and just want more of something, in your wife's case, more of me, me, me and the hell with the rest. Well, she is going to find out that the world just isn't sunshine and flowers no matter in which job or situation she ends.

Good grief, your soapbox is just annoying. I was harassed for over a year at a job. I quit with my husband's permission, but I could not have held out any longer. Sometimes work places become unbearably toxic.

Your story is irrelevant unless you are op's DW. Are you?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. She announced her notice. They actually want her to stay but she's not budging.

I am sorry your wife is so selfish and doesn't think such major decisions should be made together. This sounds like the result of too many Oprah Winfrey shows where "I" come first and "I" have to do what makes me happy. Quite frankly I think the problem is that so many people lack gratitude for what they have and what is good in their lives and just want more of something, in your wife's case, more of me, me, me and the hell with the rest. Well, she is going to find out that the world just isn't sunshine and flowers no matter in which job or situation she ends.

Good grief, your soapbox is just annoying. I was harassed for over a year at a job. I quit with my husband's permission, but I could not have held out any longer. Sometimes work places become unbearably toxic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. She announced her notice. They actually want her to stay but she's not budging.

Could something have happened at work that she isn't telling you?

Op. Possibly but she's completely shut down on the subject. She's just done.

I have done some selfish, crappy things in my marriage financially. This action by your wife is beyond the pale, though. You can't quit your job, refuse to talk about it, and expect a good outcome.

I second the PP who says that she was probably fired. Especially if rash, irresponsible decisions are not on character.

Anonymous wrote:While her reasons may seem superficial to you, mental health is a big deal. Money can always be replaced , but not ones peace of mind.

Support her decision.

Happy Wife, Happy Life.

You need a checkup.

Anonymous wrote:While her reasons may seem superficial to you, mental health is a big deal. Money can always be replaced , but not ones peace of mind.

Support her decision.

Happy Wife, Happy Life.

Ya OK. Imagine if this was a DH.

Anonymous wrote:While her reasons may seem superficial to you, mental health is a big deal. Money can always be replaced , but not ones peace of mind.

Support her decision.

Happy Wife, Happy Life.

Peace of mind doesn't pay the mortgage or put food in the kids' mouths.

Why should OP not dump her selfish ass?

Anonymous wrote:While her reasons may seem superficial to you, mental health is a big deal. Money can always be replaced , but not ones peace of mind.

Support her decision.

Happy Wife, Happy Life.

Happy husband, Happy life. Wives be more helpful and support the family financially.

Anonymous wrote:While her reasons may seem superficial to you, mental health is a big deal. Money can always be replaced , but not ones peace of mind.

Support her decision.

Happy Wife, Happy Life.

Yeah well, now they won't have insurance for her to be able to afford to seek treatment for her mental illness. So there's that.

While her reasons may seem superficial to you, mental health is a big deal. Money can always be replaced , but not ones peace of mind.

Support her decision.

Happy Wife, Happy Life.

Anonymous wrote:I would be concerned she got fired. Most normal people don't up and quit without notice. Has she been flaky like this before?

Could be depression, too. Any chance of that?

Barring health issues like depression, I'd ask her what her plan is for getting a new job. Or what's her vision of your family's financial health and future? Can you make it on just your salary?

+1