Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

You've posted before. You can be racist and married to a minority. You in particular. I feel so bad for your self-hating husband and your child. You make me sick.

Im not the pp you responded to, but I'm a white Trump voter married to a minority and have lots of minority friends. There are waaaay more of us than you think. Lots of minority voters who don't view Trump as racist (because he's not racist). I'm not racist, my husband very much loves himself (lol! But it's true!) and waste all the energy you want feeling sorry for our kids! Great, I make you sick. Psh. You don't even know me!

You are a racist and your husband is a racist and you're teaching your poor child racism.

Just because you don't like being called out doesn't mean that it isn't true. You're a racist and are seen as such by everyone. Trump is a racist, sexist, xenophobe, bigot, and sexual predator. Just because you'd prefer to believe otherwise doesn't make it any less true. I hope for your child's sake that you will see the light one day, but you sound too wrapped up in hatred and denial to see it.

Oh and the "I have lots of minority friends so I'm not racist" excuse counts for nothing. You're probably not aware of how much they're avoiding you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

You've posted before. You can be racist and married to a minority. You in particular. I feel so bad for your self-hating husband and your child. You make me sick.

Im not the pp you responded to, but I'm a white Trump voter married to a minority and have lots of minority friends. There are waaaay more of us than you think. Lots of minority voters who don't view Trump as racist (because he's not racist). I'm not racist, my husband very much loves himself (lol! But it's true!) and waste all the energy you want feeling sorry for our kids! Great, I make you sick. Psh. You don't even know me!

You are a racist and your husband is a racist and you're teaching your poor child racism.

Just because you don't like being called out doesn't mean that it isn't true. You're a racist and are seen as such by everyone. Trump is a racist, sexist, xenophobe, bigot, and sexual predator. Just because you'd prefer to believe otherwise doesn't make it any less true. I hope for your child's sake that you will see the light one day, but you sound too wrapped up in hatred and denial to see it.

Oh and the "I have lots of minority friends so I'm not racist" excuse counts for nothing. You're probably not aware of how much they're avoiding you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have somewhat similar dynamics with one set of neighbors who are devout Catholics - complete with yard signs and conversation supporting many things I disagree with.

They are lovely people, and the kind of neighbors who will keep an eye on your house when you're away, let your kids run through their yard, genuinely care about and support you if they know you are going through something, etc... And we fundamentally disagree on MANY things we all hold dear.

I have found ways a couple of times to put some discussion boundaries in place. For instance, in response to a genuine expression of religious conviction and caring - yet in a way I don't welcome, I have said things like "Thank you Jane. My views on that are pretty different, but I really appreciate the concern." Or "Well, we are not religious. Look at your beautiful rose bushes! Did you hear that the house up the street is going to be torn down?"

Etc...

Anyone paying attention, who wishes to be able to maintain a cordial relationship with neighbors, can give those conversational cues in a way that is gentle but clear, and can respect and work with them in return.

So try to think of ways to gently communicate to your neighbor that certain subjects may need to be off the table. You don't have to be explicit. If she picks up on the cues then you can both be cordial and as limited as necessary in your interactions.

If she doesn't pick up on the cues, or if you don't feel you can even stand to have generic conversations with her, then you can always be direct.

But honestly, I am trying to keep in mind that while I cannot rewrite history, or change the world, I can do my part to model bridge building and respectful interactions ESPECIALLY with the people with whom I most vehemently disagree (as long as they are also respectful of course.) So I am trying to consciously reach out to people who support Trump to have respectful discussions. It isn't easy - for either side - but I think the country needs more of that kind of discussion.

So maybe that's worth keeping in mind with your neighbor.

Good luck.

There is a huge difference between being Catholic and being a racist. I mean you can be both, but OP's issue is with her racist Trump Supporting neighbor. Totally different.

I am tired of people lecturing me on how we have to keep the communication lines open with Trump supporters. They're racist and have zero interest in reaching out to people with my ethnic background. Why is it my responsibility to reach out to them?

Yup to all of this. You will never, convince someone they are racist or have hate in their hearts. They will justify it unless they -- ON THEIR OWN -- come to a different understanding. You cannot change someone else's thinking.

Anonymous wrote:

You've posted before. You can be racist and married to a minority. You in particular. I feel so bad for your self-hating husband and your child. You make me sick.

Im not the pp you responded to, but I'm a white Trump voter married to a minority and have lots of minority friends. There are waaaay more of us than you think. Lots of minority voters who don't view Trump as racist (because he's not racist). I'm not racist, my husband very much loves himself (lol! But it's true!) and waste all the energy you want feeling sorry for our kids! Great, I make you sick. Psh. You don't even know me!

You've posted before. You can be racist and married to a minority. You in particular. I feel so bad for your self-hating husband and your child. You make me sick.

Anonymous wrote:It's a neighbor for gods sake. No one easier to ignore.

Anonymous wrote:I think it's ok to punch nazis and cool to ignore racists. Don't let them think this behavior is normal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have somewhat similar dynamics with one set of neighbors who are devout Catholics - complete with yard signs and conversation supporting many things I disagree with.

They are lovely people, and the kind of neighbors who will keep an eye on your house when you're away, let your kids run through their yard, genuinely care about and support you if they know you are going through something, etc... And we fundamentally disagree on MANY things we all hold dear.

I have found ways a couple of times to put some discussion boundaries in place. For instance, in response to a genuine expression of religious conviction and caring - yet in a way I don't welcome, I have said things like "Thank you Jane. My views on that are pretty different, but I really appreciate the concern." Or "Well, we are not religious. Look at your beautiful rose bushes! Did you hear that the house up the street is going to be torn down?"

Etc...

Anyone paying attention, who wishes to be able to maintain a cordial relationship with neighbors, can give those conversational cues in a way that is gentle but clear, and can respect and work with them in return.

So try to think of ways to gently communicate to your neighbor that certain subjects may need to be off the table. You don't have to be explicit. If she picks up on the cues then you can both be cordial and as limited as necessary in your interactions.

If she doesn't pick up on the cues, or if you don't feel you can even stand to have generic conversations with her, then you can always be direct.

But honestly, I am trying to keep in mind that while I cannot rewrite history, or change the world, I can do my part to model bridge building and respectful interactions ESPECIALLY with the people with whom I most vehemently disagree (as long as they are also respectful of course.) So I am trying to consciously reach out to people who support Trump to have respectful discussions. It isn't easy - for either side - but I think the country needs more of that kind of discussion.

So maybe that's worth keeping in mind with your neighbor.

Good luck.

There is a huge difference between being Catholic and being a racist. I mean you can be both, but OP's issue is with her racist Trump Supporting neighbor. Totally different.

I am tired of people lecturing me on how we have to keep the communication lines open with Trump supporters. They're racist and have zero interest in reaching out to people with my ethnic background. Why is it my responsibility to reach out to them?

OP here. Exactly. My husband is Catholic and pro-life, and I am very much not. We can agree to disagree on the issue. This is something beyond. This is the foundation of democracy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have somewhat similar dynamics with one set of neighbors who are devout Catholics - complete with yard signs and conversation supporting many things I disagree with.

They are lovely people, and the kind of neighbors who will keep an eye on your house when you're away, let your kids run through their yard, genuinely care about and support you if they know you are going through something, etc... And we fundamentally disagree on MANY things we all hold dear.

I have found ways a couple of times to put some discussion boundaries in place. For instance, in response to a genuine expression of religious conviction and caring - yet in a way I don't welcome, I have said things like "Thank you Jane. My views on that are pretty different, but I really appreciate the concern." Or "Well, we are not religious. Look at your beautiful rose bushes! Did you hear that the house up the street is going to be torn down?"

Etc...

Anyone paying attention, who wishes to be able to maintain a cordial relationship with neighbors, can give those conversational cues in a way that is gentle but clear, and can respect and work with them in return.

So try to think of ways to gently communicate to your neighbor that certain subjects may need to be off the table. You don't have to be explicit. If she picks up on the cues then you can both be cordial and as limited as necessary in your interactions.

If she doesn't pick up on the cues, or if you don't feel you can even stand to have generic conversations with her, then you can always be direct.

But honestly, I am trying to keep in mind that while I cannot rewrite history, or change the world, I can do my part to model bridge building and respectful interactions ESPECIALLY with the people with whom I most vehemently disagree (as long as they are also respectful of course.) So I am trying to consciously reach out to people who support Trump to have respectful discussions. It isn't easy - for either side - but I think the country needs more of that kind of discussion.

So maybe that's worth keeping in mind with your neighbor.

Good luck.

There is a huge difference between being Catholic and being a racist. I mean you can be both, but OP's issue is with her racist Trump Supporting neighbor. Totally different.

I am tired of people lecturing me on how we have to keep the communication lines open with Trump supporters. They're racist and have zero interest in reaching out to people with my ethnic background. Why is it my responsibility to reach out to them?

Anonymous wrote:She's a fool. Just cut her off and move on. There is no need to be friendly with her.

Anonymous wrote:Looking at people through politics is a way to a miserable life. Not saying the neighbor is any different.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have somewhat similar dynamics with one set of neighbors who are devout Catholics - complete with yard signs and conversation supporting many things I disagree with.

They are lovely people, and the kind of neighbors who will keep an eye on your house when you're away, let your kids run through their yard, genuinely care about and support you if they know you are going through something, etc... And we fundamentally disagree on MANY things we all hold dear.

I have found ways a couple of times to put some discussion boundaries in place. For instance, in response to a genuine expression of religious conviction and caring - yet in a way I don't welcome, I have said things like "Thank you Jane. My views on that are pretty different, but I really appreciate the concern." Or "Well, we are not religious. Look at your beautiful rose bushes! Did you hear that the house up the street is going to be torn down?"

Etc...

Anyone paying attention, who wishes to be able to maintain a cordial relationship with neighbors, can give those conversational cues in a way that is gentle but clear, and can respect and work with them in return.

So try to think of ways to gently communicate to your neighbor that certain subjects may need to be off the table. You don't have to be explicit. If she picks up on the cues then you can both be cordial and as limited as necessary in your interactions.

If she doesn't pick up on the cues, or if you don't feel you can even stand to have generic conversations with her, then you can always be direct.

But honestly, I am trying to keep in mind that while I cannot rewrite history, or change the world, I can do my part to model bridge building and respectful interactions ESPECIALLY with the people with whom I most vehemently disagree (as long as they are also respectful of course.) So I am trying to consciously reach out to people who support Trump to have respectful discussions. It isn't easy - for either side - but I think the country needs more of that kind of discussion.

So maybe that's worth keeping in mind with your neighbor.

Good luck.

There is a huge difference between being Catholic and being a racist. I mean you can be both, but OP's issue is with her racist Trump Supporting neighbor. Totally different.

I am tired of people lecturing me on how we have to keep the communication lines open with Trump supporters. They're racist and have zero interest in reaching out to people with my ethnic background. Why is it my responsibility to reach out to them?