Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of these responses are not helpful.

I will say I'm impressed with those earning <150k and make it work. We live in the suburbs and our housing costs are around $2400. We are expecting our second next year and just feel like we can't make it on DH's salary (~125k).

Because you're not hearing that families with lower HHIs are not having one parent SAH?

The reality is that many (hetero) couples who move to the DC area are dual-career couples where the woman has an equally impressive resume as the man. And many, many women choose not to SAH for very long because they get satisfaction out of their careers and want to capitalize upon their education and experience. DH is in Big Law and I have kept my career going with two kids--now late elementary school. It was never a matter of me SAH, but rather slowing down a bit when the kids were really young and now ramping up a bit more.

This. I enjoy my job and make a high salary considering the work/life balance. I've come too far to quit my job for kids. My husband would have to have an extremely demanding job and high salary (750k plus) for me to consider quitting. I enjoy getting out of the house and I'm glad I am contributing to retirement. I don't want to stay home with kids.

No one is asking you to. The OP is asking about income for people who made the choice to have someone stay home. Your family didn't? Great, glad you did what worked for you. I'm sure there's another thread for you, because this comment isn't helpful.

$180k, 2 elementary kids, cap hill rowhouse. Made a killing off a condo bought in the mid 1990s and bought on the Hill in early 2000s. No debt other than mortgage.

Our HHI was around 110K when I started to stay home. I worked part-time some years (making around 15K), but much of the time I'm taking care of one of our ailing parents in addition to kids. HHI is now closer to 135K. We have set aside for college and retirement. Vacations were always going to be visiting family anyway.

Live in DC, mortgage (all in) is 2K on a row home (purchased in 2008). We aren't big spenders on clothing or cars (1 car family as we're downtown). Preschool is a co-op. We do some classes, but the schedule isn't packed. We spend a ton of time walking the city, utilizing parks and the abundant free entertainment that DC offefs. We've never felt it was too tight, but know we live more modestly than many of our peers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even when DH was earning 200k, I didn't think we could make it. When you stay home, you tend to spend money. I would hate to be home all the time with no money to spend on activities and vacations.

This has not been our experience.

I know SAHMs who don't send their kids to preschool, never eat out, can't afford gym memberships, can't join the pool, etc. I would not want to live that way. As kids get older, their activities also start adding up. I'm a SAHM and we still spend $5k+ on just summer camp.

Why are you spending that kind of money on summer camp if you're SAhm? The whole point of sahm is not outsourcing all day childcare.

My kids are a bit older and savings is our biggest priority right now. Daycare costs are no longer a factor. So to continue to save what we feel we need to save, one of us would have to make $260k for the other to stay at home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of these responses are not helpful.

I will say I'm impressed with those earning <150k and make it work. We live in the suburbs and our housing costs are around $2400. We are expecting our second next year and just feel like we can't make it on DH's salary (~125k).

Because you're not hearing that families with lower HHIs are not having one parent SAH?

The reality is that many (hetero) couples who move to the DC area are dual-career couples where the woman has an equally impressive resume as the man. And many, many women choose not to SAH for very long because they get satisfaction out of their careers and want to capitalize upon their education and experience. DH is in Big Law and I have kept my career going with two kids--now late elementary school. It was never a matter of me SAH, but rather slowing down a bit when the kids were really young and now ramping up a bit more.

This. I enjoy my job and make a high salary considering the work/life balance. I've come too far to quit my job for kids. My husband would have to have an extremely demanding job and high salary (750k plus) for me to consider quitting. I enjoy getting out of the house and I'm glad I am contributing to retirement. I don't want to stay home with kids.

Anonymous wrote:Even when DH was earning 200k, I didn't think we could make it. When you stay home, you tend to spend money. I would hate to be home all the time with no money to spend on activities and vacations.

That has not been our experience. We tend to spend less.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even when DH was earning 200k, I didn't think we could make it. When you stay home, you tend to spend money. I would hate to be home all the time with no money to spend on activities and vacations.

This has not been our experience.

I know SAHMs who don't send their kids to preschool, never eat out, can't afford gym memberships, can't join the pool, etc. I would not want to live that way. As kids get older, their activities also start adding up. I'm a SAHM and we still spend $5k+ on just summer camp.

Anonymous wrote:Even when DH was earning 200k, I didn't think we could make it. When you stay home, you tend to spend money. I would hate to be home all the time with no money to spend on activities and vacations.

This has not been our experience.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I stayed home when DH was earning about 500k. Now he makes $1m.

I believe OP was looking for folks more on the bubble of staying home.

Is your DH an attorney who made partner? would you have stayed home if he was GS15 attorney at DOL?

DH earned around 200k out of grad school at his first job. I still worked then. I would not have stayed home if it meant giving up retirement savings, college funding, vacations, etc. At 500k, it was ok for me to stay home because we no longer needed my income.

Even when DH was earning 200k, I didn't think we could make it. When you stay home, you tend to spend money. I would hate to be home all the time with no money to spend on activities and vacations.

I think it totally varies OP. Some parents are more money savvy than others. Some parents saved saved saved saved a ton before having kids while others didn't have that opportunity.

For us, we're a young family of 6. I'm a SAHM since my oldest was born. DH makes 110K. We live in the VA 'burbs, were able to buy a SFH 5 years ago (up until then a TH), and our cars are modest and sorta old. We recently refinanced. Saved a ton pre-kids and, again, lived modestly, so we could carry over our savings once we started building our family.

Anonymous wrote:Most of these responses are not helpful.

I will say I'm impressed with those earning <150k and make it work. We live in the suburbs and our housing costs are around $2400. We are expecting our second next year and just feel like we can't make it on DH's salary (~125k).

Because you're not hearing that families with lower HHIs are not having one parent SAH?

The reality is that many (hetero) couples who move to the DC area are dual-career couples where the woman has an equally impressive resume as the man. And many, many women choose not to SAH for very long because they get satisfaction out of their careers and want to capitalize upon their education and experience. DH is in Big Law and I have kept my career going with two kids--now late elementary school. It was never a matter of me SAH, but rather slowing down a bit when the kids were really young and now ramping up a bit more.

Anonymous wrote:Most of these responses are not helpful.

I will say I'm impressed with those earning <150k and make it work. We live in the suburbs and our housing costs are around $2400. We are expecting our second next year and just feel like we can't make it on DH's salary (~125k).

It's tough. We make under $100k and our basic housing expenses (mortgage, property taxes, utilities) are close to 50% of my take home pay. For now, saving for the future is not happening. All things are possible but it sure is stressful!

$250, one child, CCMD