Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 12:11     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:OP, out of curiosity, how did your wedding planning go? Are you still friends with your bridesmaids?


Ooooooooh yea, give us the dirt on that. It will be so enlightening! Alright, it won't be, we can already guess how it went but it'll be fun fuel for the drama fire.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 12:02     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:And if caring makes me a drama queen - hand over the crown...


OP. You're a scorekeeper. Your issue is around the cousin and maybe that the grandmother provides care/sees the other GD more, or something. You may not want to acknowledge, but that's it. I don't know if I have one pic from my DS party with my parents holding him that day - EVERYONE wanted to hold him. But there are about 50,000 other pics of the grandparents holding him.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 12:02     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm not dwelling. It's been 2 days. I'll get over. Stop projecting. No one is trying to be a martyr, a princess or drama queen.

My DH's family does not plan. We end up paying for it in the end. Like cash out the door pay for it. It's not just about my daughter, they make things much harder for themselves than they need to. If it didn't effect me, I'd day F it. Do what you got to do. But that's not the case. They are making their life harder than they need to, and make a move more complicated than they have to. My point is they could have made it to the party but they didn't because they waste time and money running around in circles.


I know you're not trying to be a martyr, a princess, or a drama queen. It seems like you actually can't help it. No need to TRY.


Also, please learn the difference between affect and effect. We let the first misuse slide, but now you're really pushing it.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:51     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
OP, out of curiosity, how did your wedding planning go? Are you still friends with your bridesmaids?
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:43     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Forget it. Give them the benefit of the doubt, and a second chance. By your description they are great people, so they deserve a break.

Btw, some of your complaints are silly. Why would your mil need to call you, if she called your husband? Why should they arrange a move around YOUR child's birthday? They also have their other grandkids birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and who knows what else to work around.

It bothers me when my flaky FIL misses things. I'm not saying you don't have a right to be irritated. But you will cause a lifelong family rift if you can't get over this.


This. I'd be upset, too, OP, but let it go. The first birthday is really a celebration for the parents. They can come to the 2nd Birthday, which your child will enjoy and participate more in.

Why won't your families be together again?


Because her DD is only 1 once? Because OP will never invite her inconsiderate ILS anywhere ever again?


If it is really meaningful for the OP to have her entire family together on her daughter's birthday, she has a lifetime of birthdays to plan. Yes, none of them are the FIRST birthday, but it's not like there aren't any significant birthdays left after you turn 1.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:41     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Forget it. Give them the benefit of the doubt, and a second chance. By your description they are great people, so they deserve a break.

Btw, some of your complaints are silly. Why would your mil need to call you, if she called your husband? Why should they arrange a move around YOUR child's birthday? They also have their other grandkids birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and who knows what else to work around.

It bothers me when my flaky FIL misses things. I'm not saying you don't have a right to be irritated. But you will cause a lifelong family rift if you can't get over this.


This. I'd be upset, too, OP, but let it go. The first birthday is really a celebration for the parents. They can come to the 2nd Birthday, which your child will enjoy and participate more in.

Why won't your families be together again?


Because her DD is only 1 once? Because OP will never invite her inconsiderate ILS anywhere ever again?
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:39     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm not dwelling. It's been 2 days. I'll get over. Stop projecting. No one is trying to be a martyr, a princess or drama queen.

My DH's family does not plan. We end up paying for it in the end. Like cash out the door pay for it. It's not just about my daughter, they make things much harder for themselves than they need to. If it didn't effect me, I'd day F it. Do what you got to do. But that's not the case. They are making their life harder than they need to, and make a move more complicated than they have to. My point is they could have made it to the party but they didn't because they waste time and money running around in circles.


I know you're not trying to be a martyr, a princess, or a drama queen. It seems like you actually can't help it. No need to TRY.


+1! It comes natural!
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:39     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:I'm not dwelling. It's been 2 days. I'll get over. Stop projecting. No one is trying to be a martyr, a princess or drama queen.

My DH's family does not plan. We end up paying for it in the end. Like cash out the door pay for it. It's not just about my daughter, they make things much harder for themselves than they need to. If it didn't effect me, I'd day F it. Do what you got to do. But that's not the case. They are making their life harder than they need to, and make a move more complicated than they have to. My point is they could have made it to the party but they didn't because they waste time and money running around in circles.


What now they waste money running around in circles? Now they are making their lives harder than they need to and making a move more complicated than they have to! Keep it up OP, we are all getting a good laugh right about now. You are the only Wile E. Coyotte here.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:36     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:I'm not dwelling. It's been 2 days. I'll get over. Stop projecting. No one is trying to be a martyr, a princess or drama queen.

My DH's family does not plan. We end up paying for it in the end. Like cash out the door pay for it. It's not just about my daughter, they make things much harder for themselves than they need to. If it didn't effect me, I'd day F it. Do what you got to do. But that's not the case. They are making their life harder than they need to, and make a move more complicated than they have to. My point is they could have made it to the party but they didn't because they waste time and money running around in circles.


I know you're not trying to be a martyr, a princess, or a drama queen. It seems like you actually can't help it. No need to TRY.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:32     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
OP, step away from DCUM. You're not doing yourself any favors.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:29     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:Forget it. Give them the benefit of the doubt, and a second chance. By your description they are great people, so they deserve a break.

Btw, some of your complaints are silly. Why would your mil need to call you, if she called your husband? Why should they arrange a move around YOUR child's birthday? They also have their other grandkids birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and who knows what else to work around.

It bothers me when my flaky FIL misses things. I'm not saying you don't have a right to be irritated. But you will cause a lifelong family rift if you can't get over this.


This. I'd be upset, too, OP, but let it go. The first birthday is really a celebration for the parents. They can come to the 2nd Birthday, which your child will enjoy and participate more in.

Why won't your families be together again?
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:28     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:I'm not dwelling. It's been 2 days. I'll get over. Stop projecting. No one is trying to be a martyr, a princess or drama queen.

My DH's family does not plan. We end up paying for it in the end. Like cash out the door pay for it. It's not just about my daughter, they make things much harder for themselves than they need to. If it didn't effect me, I'd day F it. Do what you got to do. But that's not the case. They are making their life harder than they need to, and make a move more complicated than they have to. My point is they could have made it to the party but they didn't because they waste time and money running around in circles.


OP, you should just stop posting. You don't sound like a nice person. I'm sure the inlaws like you about as much as you like them.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:24     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
I'm not dwelling. It's been 2 days. I'll get over. Stop projecting. No one is trying to be a martyr, a princess or drama queen.

My DH's family does not plan. We end up paying for it in the end. Like cash out the door pay for it. It's not just about my daughter, they make things much harder for themselves than they need to. If it didn't effect me, I'd day F it. Do what you got to do. But that's not the case. They are making their life harder than they need to, and make a move more complicated than they have to. My point is they could have made it to the party but they didn't because they waste time and money running around in circles.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:19     Subject: Re:In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:I cannot read through this but have to know: did anyone agree with OP??


Nope. Pretty historical occurance for DCUM to be 100% on an IL's side.
Anonymous
Post 11/28/2016 11:12     Subject: In-laws didn't come to daughters 1st birthday
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Relax people! I'm upset. Yes. Do I plan on dwelling on this forever, no. Is it about wanting to be at the center of the universe??! Are you f-zing crazy?

My family is important. If anyone in my family had a party planned and I was moving (again not a sudden thing). I would absolutely go. That's how I work. And I posed this question because I wasn't sure if I was an outlier in that thinking. I obviously am.

I make an effort, not everyone does. It's okay. I'm okay. Relax.



The drama continues. OP, just because they couldn't make this BECAUSE THEY WERE MOVING, doesn't mean they are grandparents that don't make an effort. Stop being a martyr.


Seriously.