Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, most are 13 at some point during the year. Only summer kids are 12.

Only summer kids are 12 for aall of seventh grade. Unless there are an unusual number of red-shirted kids, kids with birthdays rright after the cut-off, &/or kids who have been held back in a class,the majority of seventh graders are still 12 in early November.

In any case, 12/13 is very young to be drinking & having sex but it is not unheard of nor is it some new phenomenon. Statistically speaking, it's actually less common than it was when most of us were that age.

When school starts, almost all the kids are already 12. All kids, except for summer birthdays, will turn 13 while in 7th grade. So, forsake of argument, we can agree that most 7th graders (sept-June school year) are 13. The same applies to KG. Most kids in KG turn 6 while in KG. This isn't hard to follow. Basic math. Doesn't matter the month, as above poster is referencing, just 7th grade which runs sep-June in VA.

Anonymous wrote:Back in the 1970's middle school was when kids decided to do drugs or not - by HS most had already made a decision. Nothing new here. As to sexually - - YOU don't know what they are doing in private. Are they sexual-beings, yes.

True but most of the kids in middle school back when I was a kid had parents that were never around. Kids with involved stay at home parents weren't off tooling around after school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do any kids have so much time on their hands to have the opportunity to engage in sexual activity at 12 or 13? I blame the parents and not the kids.

How much time do you think it takes?

Agree that they would have to be allowed to have too much idle time. My 13yo 7th grader comes home, does hw, has sports practice 3 days a week, spends time with family. He is structured and busy. (And happy.)

No, the act itself doesn't take long, but he doesn't yet have the kind of independence and free time out of the house to cultivate the relationships that would allow sexual activity to even be a possibility. Nor does he have the freedom or free time to meet up with other kids, get high or drunk, and come home in that condition unnoticed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do any kids have so much time on their hands to have the opportunity to engage in sexual activity at 12 or 13? I blame the parents and not the kids.

Really?

Sorry, I agree with PP. How in the world are these kids hanging around places alone at night, completely unsupervised, etc. at 12 years old? Don't they need rides to get around? Complete lack of parenting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MS is a problem. If you think your kid is going off the rails, I'd get them into private or parochial. A lot of our friends had nice kids that just fell into the abyss in MS and started behavior that really messed up their lives.

I was a "good" girl from a "good family" who attended Catholic school.

I was well supervised, as were my friends, and had parents who did not drink. The people we socialized with only drank moderately.

I was drinking in seventh and eighth grade with my classmates.

One was also a "good" girl from a "good family." She was sexually active by eighth with a neighbor boy.

The other girl had the cool mom. She lost her virginity in 8th grade with an 18 or 19 year old neighbor (I can't remember if he was the same age or a year older than my 12th grade sister.

You are delusional if you think parochial or private school is the firewall against this type of behavior.

1985-85

Anonymous wrote:MS is a problem. If you think your kid is going off the rails, I'd get them into private or parochial. A lot of our friends had nice kids that just fell into the abyss in MS and started behavior that really messed up their lives.

I was a "good" girl from a "good family" who attended Catholic school.

I was well supervised, as were my friends, and had parents who did not drink. The people we socialized with only drank moderately.

I was drinking in seventh and eighth grade with my classmates.

One was also a "good" girl from a "good family." She was sexually active by eighth with a neighbor boy.

The other girl had the cool mom. She lost her virginity in 8th grade with an 18 or 19 year old neighbor (I can't remember if he was the same age or a year older than my 12th grade sister.

You are delusional if you think parochial or private school is the firewall against this type of behavior.

Decades ago, I was in 7th grade in a huge public junior high school. There, the talk in 7th was all about the "bases." Kissing and getting to second base was a given. I never made it to 3rd in 7th grade but I had a girlfriend who wanted to -- we just didn't have enough private, one on one time to do it. School dances were the best time to sneak off for making out, etc. So, um, I'm certain kids in 7th these days are fooling around too, given the chance.

Virginity...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do any kids have so much time on their hands to have the opportunity to engage in sexual activity at 12 or 13? I blame the parents and not the kids.

Really?

Yes!!! I have 14 year old twins (boy/girl). My DD is always at sports practice or has a game after school. If not, she is picked up and brought home. She has a snack/dinner, does homework, walks the dog, watches YouTube or Netflix, gets ready for bed. No time for sex or drugs. Same routine for DS. So, where are the parents that 12 years olds have time to date and have sex and do drugs? I'm not saying it's impossible but if parents are monitoring their kids' activities and keeping them busy, there should not be time for opportunities to engage in risky activities. I lost my birginity at 13 and looking back now it was because I had a lot of idle time, parents were always working or not paying much attention. Thank God I didn't get pregnant because I wasn't on any birth control. The guy was 19. I'm 53 now and will not let that occur with my kids if I can help it.

They sure are. Not the majority, but some are. There were girls who were active when I was in 7th grade in 1989. They had high school boyfriends. I was too naive to realize it back then.

Years away. Years.

It's a long way, for most, from some-fooling-around-sexually and having intercourse. Year away.

For emotionally healthy teens/young adults, intercourse doesn't happen until they are emotionally mature enough. It doesn't happen until they are ready.

Unless they are self-destructive -which would also tend to come-out in other ways

Back in the 1970's middle school was when kids decided to do drugs or not - by HS most had already made a decision. Nothing new here. As to sexually - - YOU don't know what they are doing in private. Are they sexual-beings, yes.

Not many 7th graders are having sex.

But almost all are very curious about sex and starting to kiss, masterbate, maybe make out...completely normal developmentally.

Drugs were a greater problem in my school but only among a smaller group.

As for me, I was constantly masturbating (or wanting to). I was also experimenting with my best girl friend. Some might consider that being sexually active.