Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:57
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I'm not the person you quoted, but had my parents had a real and honest discussion with me about birth control and sex, the chances are pretty high that I too, as a 15 year old would have used birth control. But they didn't, they never talked to me about sex, never about birth control. People need to talk to their kids, and not just tell them "you should wait until...." Sure tell them that, but then tell them why, tell them what happens after sex, when you know you are ready to have sex with someone, tell them yes, it feels good but there are emotions and consequences to it... etc etc. Have real honest conversations. And provide birth control if they need/want it. My aunt was of the mindset that her daughter wasn't old enough to have sex and was damn sure not providing birth control or even having a discussion about it because she was too young. Her daughter ended up pregnant at 14.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
I was an uber-nerd. At 16, while on vacation, I met a nerdy girl. We were both inexperienced. Now, this was before AIDS was really known (1980). Condoms were not really accessible for us. We had sex within 18 hours of meeting. We took no precautions. We got lucky.
And when I became sexually active in college I used birth control and so did my boyfriends. Every single one of them. See what a difference only 2 or 3 years make?
There is a difference between a child having a sex and a young adult having sex.
I think we can all say we would much prefer our children to be mature responsible adults before having sex, but the reality is that doesent always happen.
I will and have talked to my kids about sex. They have both had basic sex ed. They understand about condoms and know where to buy them. BTW, both girls and guys can buy condoms and both should insist that the guy wear one.
I am not going to provide condoms to my kids. If they are mature enough to have sex then they are old enough to buy and use the condoms. Me stepping in and handling birth control for them gives them the impression that somehow they can still be kids about this and that an adult will step in and take care of these things for them.
EXACTLY.^^^^^
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:56
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:I'm not the person you quoted, but had my parents had a real and honest discussion with me about birth control and sex, the chances are pretty high that I too, as a 15 year old would have used birth control. But they didn't, they never talked to me about sex, never about birth control. People need to talk to their kids, and not just tell them "you should wait until...." Sure tell them that, but then tell them why, tell them what happens after sex, when you know you are ready to have sex with someone, tell them yes, it feels good but there are emotions and consequences to it... etc etc. Have real honest conversations. And provide birth control if they need/want it. My aunt was of the mindset that her daughter wasn't old enough to have sex and was damn sure not providing birth control or even having a discussion about it because she was too young. Her daughter ended up pregnant at 14.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
I was an uber-nerd. At 16, while on vacation, I met a nerdy girl. We were both inexperienced. Now, this was before AIDS was really known (1980). Condoms were not really accessible for us. We had sex within 18 hours of meeting. We took no precautions. We got lucky.
And when I became sexually active in college I used birth control and so did my boyfriends. Every single one of them. See what a difference only 2 or 3 years make?
There is a difference between a child having a sex and a young adult having sex.
I think we can all say we would much prefer our children to be mature responsible adults before having sex, but the reality is that doesent always happen.
I will and have talked to my kids about sex. They have both had basic sex ed. They understand about condoms and know where to buy them. BTW, both girls and guys can buy condoms and both should insist that the guy wear one.
I am not going to provide condoms to my kids. If they are mature enough to have sex then they are old enough to buy and use the condoms. Me stepping in and handling birth control for them gives them the impression that somehow they can still be kids about this and that an adult will step in and take care of these things for them.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:44
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
WTH! You don't know anything about the pp. My first though after reading that was "Wow, that's amazing that you married your high school sweetheart and are still together." I think it's admirable.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
LOL, I was "nerdy" too....LOL LOL LOL If only that were truly protection.
+1. DH is one of the nerdiest guys I know. He was laying pipe (in me) at age 16, and I definitely wasn't his first.
You married the guy you dated when you were 16... and you think you are in a position to say... hey look at me, turned out fine.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:43
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
I'm not the person you quoted, but had my parents had a real and honest discussion with me about birth control and sex, the chances are pretty high that I too, as a 15 year old would have used birth control. But they didn't, they never talked to me about sex, never about birth control. People need to talk to their kids, and not just tell them "you should wait until...." Sure tell them that, but then tell them why, tell them what happens after sex, when you know you are ready to have sex with someone, tell them yes, it feels good but there are emotions and consequences to it... etc etc. Have real honest conversations. And provide birth control if they need/want it. My aunt was of the mindset that her daughter wasn't old enough to have sex and was damn sure not providing birth control or even having a discussion about it because she was too young. Her daughter ended up pregnant at 14.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
I was an uber-nerd. At 16, while on vacation, I met a nerdy girl. We were both inexperienced. Now, this was before AIDS was really known (1980). Condoms were not really accessible for us. We had sex within 18 hours of meeting. We took no precautions. We got lucky.
And when I became sexually active in college I used birth control and so did my boyfriends. Every single one of them. See what a difference only 2 or 3 years make?
There is a difference between a child having a sex and a young adult having sex.
I think we can all say we would much prefer our children to be mature responsible adults before having sex, but the reality is that doesent always happen.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:43
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
I learned that my 16 year old son has been sexually active for the last couple of months with his girlfriend.
Looks like someone is going to be a grandma soon, or running herself ragged taking little mister fornicator to the STD clinic.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:39
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
LOL, I was "nerdy" too....LOL LOL LOL If only that were truly protection.
+1. DH is one of the nerdiest guys I know. He was laying pipe (in me) at age 16, and I definitely wasn't his first.
You married the guy you dated when you were 16... and you think you are in a position to say... hey look at me, turned out fine.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:36
Subject: Sexually Active 16 year old
My kid knows all the reasons to use a condom. My husband and I have explained it all. And we made sure he has them if he never needs them. We can't physically make sure he uses them but we can do everything reasonable to ensure he is fully aware of what a huge responsibility this is. I do more than provide "basic sex ed." That's what he got in school, we have honest conversations about the responsibilities, the pros and cons, and what it all means. Do you also think it's not a parent's place to assist your daughter in getting birth control? Say, an IUD or the pill?Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I'm a pp that said I started having sex at 15. I would have never ever gone into a store at that age and purchased condoms and I sure as Hell wouldn't have asked my parents to put me on the pill. And Hell no, I wasn't ready to be a mother. But guess, what? I had sex anyway, and the guy I was with did not have a condom either. I didn't end up pregnant but I damn sure could have. Take your own advice, don't be ignorant, teens are having sex. Don't be that parent that ends up with an unintended teen pregnancy on your hands because it' wasn't your place to ensure your kid had proper birth control and knew how to use it.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If my 16 year old son is not mature enough to buy himself condoms and if he doesn't have the good sense to understand that he is in no way ready to become a dad then he has no business having sex. He isn't ready. He is too damn young to handle the responsibility of being sexually active.
Yes, make sure that they have basic sex ed. This is not something to be ignorant about. But it isn't a parent's place to be supplying condoms to the kid.
+ 100000000000000000000
Would you expect the parents who provide these condoms to also make sure that the kids are actually using them?? Because if the children are not mature enough to find a way to buy a condom between the two of them then they are not likely to understand the reason for using a condom either.
Sex is a grown up responsibility with very real grown up and lifelong consequences. Children have no business having sex. None.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:32
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
I was an uber-nerd. At 16, while on vacation, I met a nerdy girl. We were both inexperienced. Now, this was before AIDS was really known (1980). Condoms were not really accessible for us. We had sex within 18 hours of meeting. We took no precautions. We got lucky.
And when I became sexually active in college I used birth control and so did my boyfriends. Every single one of them. See what a difference only 2 or 3 years make?
There is a difference between a child having a sex and a young adult having sex.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:30
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
My 31-year old husband has a 14-year old daughter because he and his parents didn't have the mindset to have open, honest conversations...
First off, your kid seems like a nice kid, so chalk that up to a win! If your son is in a long-term relationship with the girlfriend then I'm assuming you know her and her parents pretty well? And if you don't know the girlfriend or her parents very well, please make it a point to get to know them as soon as possible. More open, honest conversations need to be happening in your house and at the girlfriend's house. Be 1000000% sure they are using condoms AND she is on birth control AND taking it correctly!! None of this "oh I forget to take it every other day" or "it doesn't feel as good" bullcrap... And also make sure they know about Plan B just in case their birth control fails. You can buy it at the pharmacy without a prescription.
Heck, make them babysit an infant and toddler for a day/night just to drive the point home...
First off, your kid seems like a nice kid, so chalk that up to a win! If your son is in a long-term relationship with the girlfriend then I'm assuming you know her and her parents pretty well? And if you don't know the girlfriend or her parents very well, please make it a point to get to know them as soon as possible. More open, honest conversations need to be happening in your house and at the girlfriend's house. Be 1000000% sure they are using condoms AND she is on birth control AND taking it correctly!! None of this "oh I forget to take it every other day" or "it doesn't feel as good" bullcrap... And also make sure they know about Plan B just in case their birth control fails. You can buy it at the pharmacy without a prescription.
Heck, make them babysit an infant and toddler for a day/night just to drive the point home...
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:29
Subject: Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:I'm a pp that said I started having sex at 15. I would have never ever gone into a store at that age and purchased condoms and I sure as Hell wouldn't have asked my parents to put me on the pill. And Hell no, I wasn't ready to be a mother. But guess, what? I had sex anyway, and the guy I was with did not have a condom either. I didn't end up pregnant but I damn sure could have. Take your own advice, don't be ignorant, teens are having sex. Don't be that parent that ends up with an unintended teen pregnancy on your hands because it' wasn't your place to ensure your kid had proper birth control and knew how to use it.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If my 16 year old son is not mature enough to buy himself condoms and if he doesn't have the good sense to understand that he is in no way ready to become a dad then he has no business having sex. He isn't ready. He is too damn young to handle the responsibility of being sexually active.
Yes, make sure that they have basic sex ed. This is not something to be ignorant about. But it isn't a parent's place to be supplying condoms to the kid.
+ 100000000000000000000
Would you expect the parents who provide these condoms to also make sure that the kids are actually using them?? Because if the children are not mature enough to find a way to buy a condom between the two of them then they are not likely to understand the reason for using a condom either.
Sex is a grown up responsibility with very real grown up and lifelong consequences. Children have no business having sex. None.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:27
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
I was an uber-nerd. At 16, while on vacation, I met a nerdy girl. We were both inexperienced. Now, this was before AIDS was really known (1980). Condoms were not really accessible for us. We had sex within 18 hours of meeting. We took no precautions. We got lucky.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:21
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
So anyone that is not "nerdy" is "fast".Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
I swear, the ignorance on this thread is amazing.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:21
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
LOL, I was "nerdy" too....LOL LOL LOL If only that were truly protection.
+1. DH is one of the nerdiest guys I know. He was laying pipe (in me) at age 16, and I definitely wasn't his first.
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:20
Subject: Sexually Active 16 year old
I'm a pp that said I started having sex at 15. I would have never ever gone into a store at that age and purchased condoms and I sure as Hell wouldn't have asked my parents to put me on the pill. And Hell no, I wasn't ready to be a mother. But guess, what? I had sex anyway, and the guy I was with did not have a condom either. I didn't end up pregnant but I damn sure could have. Take your own advice, don't be ignorant, teens are having sex. Don't be that parent that ends up with an unintended teen pregnancy on your hands because it' wasn't your place to ensure your kid had proper birth control and knew how to use it.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If my 16 year old son is not mature enough to buy himself condoms and if he doesn't have the good sense to understand that he is in no way ready to become a dad then he has no business having sex. He isn't ready. He is too damn young to handle the responsibility of being sexually active.
Yes, make sure that they have basic sex ed. This is not something to be ignorant about. But it isn't a parent's place to be supplying condoms to the kid.
+ 100000000000000000000
Anonymous
06/29/2016 14:18
Subject: Re:Sexually Active 16 year old
Anonymous wrote:Mom of nerdy 15 year old here. SO glad he is nerdy!!! I don't have to worry about this ridiculous idea of sex at such a young age. He doesn't have a girlfriend. He is just interested in hanging out with his friends, doing his sports, and playing video games/watching movies. So young and innocent, I know he won't be having sex any time soon. I feel so sorry for you parents of the "fast crowd."
LOL, I was "nerdy" too....LOL LOL LOL If only that were truly protection.