Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually am a HYP grad who is currently a SAH mom for my kids (for now). In lots of ways, I have done a terrible job. Book smarts does not translate one-to-one with being a natural, intuitive mom.

You sound really rigid and judgmental and self-righteous. Be careful about the values that you are teaching your kid, because in the end you may find that you were wrong about some things you were really positive you were right about. I'd advise you to try to adjust your thinking now to allow for that possibility, before you're too late.

I'm sorry that you are not a natural, intuitive mom. Of all my accomplishments, I am most proud of my children. They are awesome kids. I felt great guilt when I was working even though we had the best nanny and preschool. I sacrificed my career and put my all into my children. They are not necessarily the smartest or the best at soccer or tennis but I love them to pieces. I am so proud and happy to be their mom. We purposely live in a diverse neighborhood. I guess I will have to accept that some parents are ok with letting their kids watch tv and play video games all day. I just feel there are so many better ways to spend your time like doing your homework!

Sorry, OP, but you have to be a troll. No one is this obnoxious in real life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And THIS ladies and gentlemen, is why parents should not be volunteering in the classroom. Get a job lady, because clearly you have too much time on your hands since you are all up in other folks business.

I agree. I hate the classroom busy bodies.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually am a HYP grad who is currently a SAH mom for my kids (for now). In lots of ways, I have done a terrible job. Book smarts does not translate one-to-one with being a natural, intuitive mom.

You sound really rigid and judgmental and self-righteous. Be careful about the values that you are teaching your kid, because in the end you may find that you were wrong about some things you were really positive you were right about. I'd advise you to try to adjust your thinking now to allow for that possibility, before you're too late.

I'm sorry that you are not a natural, intuitive mom. Of all my accomplishments, I am most proud of my children. They are awesome kids. I felt great guilt when I was working even though we had the best nanny and preschool. I sacrificed my career and put my all into my children. They are not necessarily the smartest or the best at soccer or tennis but I love them to pieces. I am so proud and happy to be their mom. We purposely live in a diverse neighborhood. I guess I will have to accept that some parents are ok with letting their kids watch tv and play video games all day. I just feel there are so many better ways to spend your time like doing your homework!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually am a HYP grad who is currently a SAH mom for my kids (for now). In lots of ways, I have done a terrible job. Book smarts does not translate one-to-one with being a natural, intuitive mom.

You sound really rigid and judgmental and self-righteous. Be careful about the values that you are teaching your kid, because in the end you may find that you were wrong about some things you were really positive you were right about. I'd advise you to try to adjust your thinking now to allow for that possibility, before you're too late.

I'm sorry that you are not a natural, intuitive mom. Of all my accomplishments, I am most proud of my children. They are awesome kids. I felt great guilt when I was working even though we had the best nanny and preschool. I sacrificed my career and put my all into my children. They are not necessarily the smartest or the best at soccer or tennis but I love them to pieces. I am so proud and happy to be their mom. We purposely live in a diverse neighborhood. I guess I will have to accept that some parents are ok with letting their kids watch tv and play video games all day. I just feel there are so many better ways to spend your time like doing your homework!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


^^ Thank you. I couldn't agree more. I see so many helicopter parents around me and on DCUM raising helpless little brats who fall apart their first week in college; it's nice to see other likeminded people who believe in raising responsible, independent, and competent children.

I am guessing that the very great majority of parents believe in raising responsible, independent, and competent children. It's just that various people have various ideas about how to achieve that goal, which may be different from your ideas.

Okay - are people really so stupid that they think they can teach kids how to be responsible, independent, and competent by not giving them any responsibilities whatsoever and doing their work for them? Or by micromanaging them?

Anonymous wrote:And THIS ladies and gentlemen, is why parents should not be volunteering in the classroom. Get a job lady, because clearly you have too much time on your hands since you are all up in other folks business.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


^^ Thank you. I couldn't agree more. I see so many helicopter parents around me and on DCUM raising helpless little brats who fall apart their first week in college; it's nice to see other likeminded people who believe in raising responsible, independent, and competent children.

I am guessing that the very great majority of parents believe in raising responsible, independent, and competent children. It's just that various people have various ideas about how to achieve that goal, which may be different from your ideas.

Anonymous wrote:


^^ Thank you. I couldn't agree more. I see so many helicopter parents around me and on DCUM raising helpless little brats who fall apart their first week in college; it's nice to see other likeminded people who believe in raising responsible, independent, and competent children.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assuming for the sake of argument that there is no value in homework in the early years (although the research on that is far more mixed than people like to acknowledge), it's still crappy parenting because it sets the precedent of only doing the things you find value in, regardless of what the expectations are of you. Good luck to those parents in a couple of years when the homework does matter (either because of its recognized value, or because it counts toward a grade) and they're having battles with their kids who don't want to do homework and have had it ingrained in them that homework is optional. Hopefully you're able to work through that with them before it affects high school grades, college admissions, job prospects, etc.

+1,000

This PP is right.

To the OP: Be sure you never do homework FOR your kids, and I hope that when you talk about doing homework "with" kids you mean helping them get ready, focus, decide what to do first, etc., and that you don't mean sitting next to them the entire time guiding each math problem or writing assignment. But do be aware of their homework, set aside a time that is just for doing it, have a place in the home that is free of distractions and siblings, etc. I get the frustration that other kids are not doing homework. If you are working with other parents' kids in school, there's nothing you can do about parents who are so uninvolved that they don't even ask their kid, "Do you have your worksheet to hand in today?" because, God forbid, that might be helicoptering. Just do whatever the teacher asks of you at school, and focus on giving your own kids, at home, a healthy respect for the teacher and the assignments.

I'm amazed at the number of posts on DCUM over the years from parents who clearly figure that whether or not homework gets done is 100 percent on their young, elementary-aged kids, and parents should have zero influence. It's also appalling to see the level of disdain for teachers' assigning any homework to elementary kids. As the PP notes above: This sends a message that homework doesn't really matter, it's a choice and not a requirement, and the parents really don't care about it--so why should the kids? I can only figure these are parents of elementary students, because once those kids hit middle school and homework is a huge part of grades in some classes, those kids are going to slam into a brick wall.

And mom and dad are going to wonder, gosh, why is junior is tanking? It will be because junior never learned to schedule and do his homework, never learned which work to do immediately and which can wait, never learned to study in any way that goes beyond re-reading worksheets.

Kids are not born knowing how to set priorities or organize themselves. Parents do have a role -- which many on here seem most willing to abdicate -- in teaching their children study skills, and in teaching their children to respect the assignments teachers give them, even if the kid (and parent) dislike the work involved.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"That's nice. In our house, LEARNING is a priority, but we don't believe the only or best way people learn is through school. Oh, and btw, I was a model for a long time. Super well off. No college. No regrats. (j/k) "

Irony alert!

That was clearly a joke. Do you not know what j/k means?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually am a HYP grad who is currently a SAH mom for my kids (for now). In lots of ways, I have done a terrible job. Book smarts does not translate one-to-one with being a natural, intuitive mom.

You sound really rigid and judgmental and self-righteous. Be careful about the values that you are teaching your kid, because in the end you may find that you were wrong about some things you were really positive you were right about. I'd advise you to try to adjust your thinking now to allow for that possibility, before you're too late.

I'm sorry that you are not a natural, intuitive mom. Of all my accomplishments, I am most proud of my children. They are awesome kids. I felt great guilt when I was working even though we had the best nanny and preschool. I sacrificed my career and put my all into my children. They are not necessarily the smartest or the best at soccer or tennis but I love them to pieces. I am so proud and happy to be their mom. We purposely live in a diverse neighborhood. I guess I will have to accept that some parents are ok with letting their kids watch tv and play video games all day. I just feel there are so many better ways to spend your time like doing your homework!