2. Many men who cheat are nonetheless good fathers, brothers, sons, friends, employees, even good husbands in every other way. If male infidelity were driven by some kind of underlying personality disorder, that wouldn't be the case.

Anonymous wrote:

Odysseus wrote:A few things:

1. For the most part, men do not cheat because of low self-esteem, "entitlement" (whatever that means, exactly), ego, or "mental illness" (lol). These are explanations women make up because they don't understand men. Men cheat, or want to cheat, because the vast majority of them find sexual variety pleasing in and of itself. You know how you'd probably end up bored with your favorite food if you had to eat it three meals a day, every day? This is exactly the same idea. Yes, I am aware that this impulse also exists in women, but it doesn't seem to be *nearly* as strong.

2. Many men who cheat are nonetheless good fathers, brothers, sons, friends, employees, even good husbands in every other way. If male infidelity were driven by some kind of underlying personality disorder, that wouldn't be the case.

3. Men do differ. A few find it easy to be faithful. Some find it damn near impossible, even with the best of intentions.

4. Surveys consistently indicate that there are a lot of people (of both sexes) who refrain from having affairs only because they worry about the potential consequences. I guess reasonable people can disagree about this, but I don't see any difference, morally, between actually cheating and staying faithful only because you're worried about getting caught.

End thread, this is the most accurate response I have ever read.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know many men who have been faithful, at least the handsome charming men all seem to cheat at some point. I think it would shock women if they knew how often infidelity happens.

I am not sure if I am capable of being faithful. I have never been faithful, not completely. When my wife and I are having a lot of sex, I really don't think of other women that much. The sex dries up, like it always does, and other women become near obsession for me.

Maybe if I married a woman with a high sex drive. No idea where to find those. Every woman has a high drive in the beginning. Wait 3 years.

The above experience mirrors mine. I love my wife, but if the sex slows, I go elsewhere, temporarily.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here is the thing about cheating, it's a rush. The adrenal is pumping, your doing something wrong and getting away with it and it involves sex. Crack can't give you a high that compares to that. You get upset or sad or disappointed in present relationship you go to look for something to make you feel better. Someone else, some where else, sneaking around, covet ops to find places to be together...it is all so tantalizing. Women cheat just as much as men, don't fool yourself. Who do you think all those men are cheating with? It aint just the guys out there women get the same thrill of a cheat.

Really sad and immature. I'll bet you know all about crack too. I hope you get your act together..otherwise you're in for a f'd up future.

Anonymous wrote:I don't know many men who have been faithful, at least the handsome charming men all seem to cheat at some point. I think it would shock women if they knew how often infidelity happens.

I am not sure if I am capable of being faithful. I have never been faithful, not completely. When my wife and I are having a lot of sex, I really don't think of other women that much. The sex dries up, like it always does, and other women become near obsession for me.

Maybe if I married a woman with a high sex drive. No idea where to find those. Every woman has a high drive in the beginning. Wait 3 years.

Odysseus wrote:A few things:

1. For the most part, men do not cheat because of low self-esteem, "entitlement" (whatever that means, exactly), ego, or "mental illness" (lol). These are explanations women make up because they don't understand men. Men cheat, or want to cheat, because the vast majority of them find sexual variety pleasing in and of itself. You know how you'd probably end up bored with your favorite food if you had to eat it three meals a day, every day? This is exactly the same idea. Yes, I am aware that this impulse also exists in women, but it doesn't seem to be *nearly* as strong.

2. Many men who cheat are nonetheless good fathers, brothers, sons, friends, employees, even good husbands in every other way. If male infidelity were driven by some kind of underlying personality disorder, that wouldn't be the case.

3. Men do differ. A few find it easy to be faithful. Some find it damn near impossible, even with the best of intentions.

4. Surveys consistently indicate that there are a lot of people (of both sexes) who refrain from having affairs only because they worry about the potential consequences. I guess reasonable people can disagree about this, but I don't see any difference, morally, between actually cheating and staying faithful only because you're worried about getting caught.

Odysseus wrote:A few things:

1. For the most part, men do not cheat because of low self-esteem, "entitlement" (whatever that means, exactly), ego, or "mental illness" (lol). These are explanations women make up because they don't understand men. Men cheat, or want to cheat, because the vast majority of them find sexual variety pleasing in and of itself. You know how you'd probably end up bored with your favorite food if you had to eat it three meals a day, every day? This is exactly the same idea. Yes, I am aware that this impulse also exists in women, but it doesn't seem to be *nearly* as strong.

2. Many men who cheat are nonetheless good fathers, brothers, sons, friends, employees, even good husbands in every other way. If male infidelity were driven by some kind of underlying personality disorder, that wouldn't be the case.

3. Men do differ. A few find it easy to be faithful. Some find it damn near impossible, even with the best of intentions.

4. Surveys consistently indicate that there are a lot of people (of both sexes) who refrain from having affairs only because they worry about the potential consequences. I guess reasonable people can disagree about this, but I don't see any difference, morally, between actually cheating and staying faithful only because you're worried about getting caught.

Anonymous wrote:Here is the thing about cheating, it's a rush. The adrenal is pumping, your doing something wrong and getting away with it and it involves sex. Crack can't give you a high that compares to that. You get upset or sad or disappointed in present relationship you go to look for something to make you feel better. Someone else, some where else, sneaking around, covet ops to find places to be together...it is all so tantalizing. Women cheat just as much as men, don't fool yourself. Who do you think all those men are cheating with? It aint just the guys out there women get the same thrill of a cheat.

Anonymous wrote:My wife refused to have sex with me for three years. She once told me that it must be hard not to have sex. Previously she had an text/online affair with a co worker with whom she exchanged very explicit emails. She never talks dirty to me. kids are 5 and 3. Now we have sex once in two months. Before I got married I had many sex partners, my libido is high. I help around the house, give her emotional support, etc. I talked to her about sex but she threatened to take the kids from me if I cheat. I won't be able to be faithful to her for too long if our situation does not change. She thinks it's my fault that I want to have sex.