Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I can add a different perspective. I married wealthy and I am a sahm. I have a family member who is very envious of this. She cannot stop making snide commits about gold digging and marrying for money, even though dh and I have been married for 20 years are each other's best friends and very much in love.

She goes on how it must be nice to be a sahm and guilts me for it. I tell her it was always my plan to be a sahm, that I would have made it work somehow no matter finances, she'ok then say something like I am not a real sahm because we have money or I wouldn't have married dh if he were poor.

Anything I put on social media gets a rude comment from her. "Must be nice" "first world problem" this was a recent one, after my daughter started her first riding lesson. "Lucky kid or spoiled brat? You be the judge"

It's a sad and used to bother me a lot. She and I were close until I got engaged, then her attitude has seriously changed towards me and she can't let it go.

If it was you plan to SAH it's likely you did filter for providers so you are being disingenuous.

And why not hide posts from her; I know defriending family can be tricky but what she never sees won't bother her.

I met my husband and fell for him while on a mission trip to central america. No I wasn't filtering men to suit my needs. If we lived in a tiny house with one car and I had to coupon and scrimp and save I would still be a sahm (thats just how I feel for my life everyone is different) I don't hide from her because 20 years on, if she doesn't like my life it is on her to not look at it. Like I said, it used to bother me now not so much.

It's easy to say you would have been a SAHM, no matter the circumstances, from your perch. If your DH had to work 16 hours a day at a dangerous job with a long commute would you still be a SAHM, or would you set aside your desires and do what was best for your family? I prefer to work, but if it turns out at some point that for me to be a SAHM is what works best for my family, that's what I'll do. I suspect your "SAHM no matter what" triggers some obnoxious reactions, though I do think your friend is completely out of line.

You do realize there are low income sahms right? Some people just want to be primary caregiver to their children.

Yes, my parents were poor and my mom was a SAHM. But anyone who would let their husbands work dangerously long hours and never see their children, simply due to personal preference, is not a very good mother. Any decent parent takes into account the good of the family, not just what she wants.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, but we do well enough to have a VERY nice life (combined HHI around 450K) and I can honestly say that I don't want for any more. My DH is very involved, and coaches all of our boys sports, which for some reason is really really sexy. I've had more than a few of the moms from over the years on our teams tell me that they wish their DHs were more like mine. I know for a fact that women are jealous of what I've got and money can't buy what he brings to the table.

I have ONE friend whose DH is rich (IPO money) and their marriage is breaking down. He is treats her terribly and talks to her like she is a dog. He now does it in front of people and it is horrible. She seems abused.

I'm not saying wealth leads to misery (because it doesn't!), but my one frame of reference of a DH who is "filthy" rich, he happens to be a douche bag and there is no amount of money in the world that will change that. His attitude makes him very unattractive.

You are the household that OP was asking about. You ARE one of the wealthy families. Did you not realize that?

I am glad I am not the only one who read this and thought to myself that she is one of the wealthy families w/ a HHI of 450K! LOL

The reading skills of some of the respondents make me seriously wonder how far into 10th grade some of you made it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, but we do well enough to have a VERY nice life (combined HHI around 450K) and I can honestly say that I don't want for any more. My DH is very involved, and coaches all of our boys sports, which for some reason is really really sexy. I've had more than a few of the moms from over the years on our teams tell me that they wish their DHs were more like mine. I know for a fact that women are jealous of what I've got and money can't buy what he brings to the table.

I have ONE friend whose DH is rich (IPO money) and their marriage is breaking down. He is treats her terribly and talks to her like she is a dog. He now does it in front of people and it is horrible. She seems abused.

I'm not saying wealth leads to misery (because it doesn't!), but my one frame of reference of a DH who is "filthy" rich, he happens to be a douche bag and there is no amount of money in the world that will change that. His attitude makes him very unattractive.

You are the household that OP was asking about. You ARE one of the wealthy families. Did you not realize that?

I am glad I am not the only one who read this and thought to myself that she is one of the wealthy families w/ a HHI of 450K! LOL

The reading skills of some of the respondents make me seriously wonder how far into 10th grade some of you made it.

Anonymous wrote:No times 10.

One has a husband that constantly cheats, one has a husband that fathered a kid when they were separated briefly. We may not have that kind of money but my marriage is secure and I'm not miserable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I can add a different perspective. I married wealthy and I am a sahm. I have a family member who is very envious of this. She cannot stop making snide commits about gold digging and marrying for money, even though dh and I have been married for 20 years are each other's best friends and very much in love.

She goes on how it must be nice to be a sahm and guilts me for it. I tell her it was always my plan to be a sahm, that I would have made it work somehow no matter finances, she'ok then say something like I am not a real sahm because we have money or I wouldn't have married dh if he were poor.

Anything I put on social media gets a rude comment from her. "Must be nice" "first world problem" this was a recent one, after my daughter started her first riding lesson. "Lucky kid or spoiled brat? You be the judge"

It's a sad and used to bother me a lot. She and I were close until I got engaged, then her attitude has seriously changed towards me and she can't let it go.

If it was you plan to SAH it's likely you did filter for providers so you are being disingenuous.

And why not hide posts from her; I know defriending family can be tricky but what she never sees won't bother her.

I met my husband and fell for him while on a mission trip to central america. No I wasn't filtering men to suit my needs. If we lived in a tiny house with one car and I had to coupon and scrimp and save I would still be a sahm (thats just how I feel for my life everyone is different) I don't hide from her because 20 years on, if she doesn't like my life it is on her to not look at it. Like I said, it used to bother me now not so much.

It's easy to say you would have been a SAHM, no matter the circumstances, from your perch. If your DH had to work 16 hours a day at a dangerous job with a long commute would you still be a SAHM, or would you set aside your desires and do what was best for your family? I prefer to work, but if it turns out at some point that for me to be a SAHM is what works best for my family, that's what I'll do. I suspect your "SAHM no matter what" triggers some obnoxious reactions, though I do think your friend is completely out of line.

You do realize there are low income sahms right? Some people just want to be primary caregiver to their children.

Yes, my parents were poor and my mom was a SAHM. But anyone who would let their husbands work dangerously long hours and never see their children, simply due to personal preference, is not a very good mother. Any decent parent takes into account the good of the family, not just what she wants.

Anonymous wrote:When I Now I've seen how money isn't always forever. Ive have one friend who's "rich" husband is now in jail for a huge ponzi scheme.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I can add a different perspective. I married wealthy and I am a sahm. I have a family member who is very envious of this. She cannot stop making snide commits about gold digging and marrying for money, even though dh and I have been married for 20 years are each other's best friends and very much in love.

She goes on how it must be nice to be a sahm and guilts me for it. I tell her it was always my plan to be a sahm, that I would have made it work somehow no matter finances, she'ok then say something like I am not a real sahm because we have money or I wouldn't have married dh if he were poor.

Anything I put on social media gets a rude comment from her. "Must be nice" "first world problem" this was a recent one, after my daughter started her first riding lesson. "Lucky kid or spoiled brat? You be the judge"

It's a sad and used to bother me a lot. She and I were close until I got engaged, then her attitude has seriously changed towards me and she can't let it go.

If it was you plan to SAH it's likely you did filter for providers so you are being disingenuous.

And why not hide posts from her; I know defriending family can be tricky but what she never sees won't bother her.

I met my husband and fell for him while on a mission trip to central america. No I wasn't filtering men to suit my needs. If we lived in a tiny house with one car and I had to coupon and scrimp and save I would still be a sahm (thats just how I feel for my life everyone is different) I don't hide from her because 20 years on, if she doesn't like my life it is on her to not look at it. Like I said, it used to bother me now not so much.

It's easy to say you would have been a SAHM, no matter the circumstances, from your perch. If your DH had to work 16 hours a day at a dangerous job with a long commute would you still be a SAHM, or would you set aside your desires and do what was best for your family? I prefer to work, but if it turns out at some point that for me to be a SAHM is what works best for my family, that's what I'll do. I suspect your "SAHM no matter what" triggers some obnoxious reactions, though I do think your friend is completely out of line.

You do realize there are low income sahms right? Some people just want to be primary caregiver to their children.

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I can add a different perspective. I married wealthy and I am a sahm. I have a family member who is very envious of this. She cannot stop making snide commits about gold digging and marrying for money, even though dh and I have been married for 20 years are each other's best friends and very much in love.

She goes on how it must be nice to be a sahm and guilts me for it. I tell her it was always my plan to be a sahm, that I would have made it work somehow no matter finances, she'ok then say something like I am not a real sahm because we have money or I wouldn't have married dh if he were poor.

Anything I put on social media gets a rude comment from her. "Must be nice" "first world problem" this was a recent one, after my daughter started her first riding lesson. "Lucky kid or spoiled brat? You be the judge"

It's a sad and used to bother me a lot. She and I were close until I got engaged, then her attitude has seriously changed towards me and she can't let it go.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
+1 I always wanted to be a SAHM

Who doesn't? Working for a living sucks and is for the poors.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, but we do well enough to have a VERY nice life (combined HHI around 450K) and I can honestly say that I don't want for any more. My DH is very involved, and coaches all of our boys sports, which for some reason is really really sexy. I've had more than a few of the moms from over the years on our teams tell me that they wish their DHs were more like mine. I know for a fact that women are jealous of what I've got and money can't buy what he brings to the table.

I have ONE friend whose DH is rich (IPO money) and their marriage is breaking down. He is treats her terribly and talks to her like she is a dog. He now does it in front of people and it is horrible. She seems abused.

I'm not saying wealth leads to misery (because it doesn't!), but my one frame of reference of a DH who is "filthy" rich, he happens to be a douche bag and there is no amount of money in the world that will change that. His attitude makes him very unattractive.

You are the household that OP was asking about. You ARE one of the wealthy families. Did you not realize that?

I am glad I am not the only one who read this and thought to myself that she is one of the wealthy families w/ a HHI of 450K! LOL

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I can add a different perspective. I married wealthy and I am a sahm. I have a family member who is very envious of this. She cannot stop making snide commits about gold digging and marrying for money, even though dh and I have been married for 20 years are each other's best friends and very much in love.

She goes on how it must be nice to be a sahm and guilts me for it. I tell her it was always my plan to be a sahm, that I would have made it work somehow no matter finances, she'ok then say something like I am not a real sahm because we have money or I wouldn't have married dh if he were poor.

Anything I put on social media gets a rude comment from her. "Must be nice" "first world problem" this was a recent one, after my daughter started her first riding lesson. "Lucky kid or spoiled brat? You be the judge"

It's a sad and used to bother me a lot. She and I were close until I got engaged, then her attitude has seriously changed towards me and she can't let it go.

If it was you plan to SAH it's likely you did filter for providers so you are being disingenuous.

And why not hide posts from her; I know defriending family can be tricky but what she never sees won't bother her.

I met my husband and fell for him while on a mission trip to central america. No I wasn't filtering men to suit my needs. If we lived in a tiny house with one car and I had to coupon and scrimp and save I would still be a sahm (thats just how I feel for my life everyone is different) I don't hide from her because 20 years on, if she doesn't like my life it is on her to not look at it. Like I said, it used to bother me now not so much.

It's easy to say you would have been a SAHM, no matter the circumstances, from your perch. If your DH had to work 16 hours a day at a dangerous job with a long commute would you still be a SAHM, or would you set aside your desires and do what was best for your family? I prefer to work, but if it turns out at some point that for me to be a SAHM is what works best for my family, that's what I'll do. I suspect your "SAHM no matter what" triggers some obnoxious reactions, though I do think your friend is completely out of line.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, but we do well enough to have a VERY nice life (combined HHI around 450K) and I can honestly say that I don't want for any more. My DH is very involved, and coaches all of our boys sports, which for some reason is really really sexy. I've had more than a few of the moms from over the years on our teams tell me that they wish their DHs were more like mine. I know for a fact that women are jealous of what I've got and money can't buy what he brings to the table.

I have ONE friend whose DH is rich (IPO money) and their marriage is breaking down. He is treats her terribly and talks to her like she is a dog. He now does it in front of people and it is horrible. She seems abused.

I'm not saying wealth leads to misery (because it doesn't!), but my one frame of reference of a DH who is "filthy" rich, he happens to be a douche bag and there is no amount of money in the world that will change that. His attitude makes him very unattractive.

You are the household that OP was asking about. You ARE one of the wealthy families. Did you not realize that?

Anonymous wrote:I like being financially independent and having a career. Never wanted to be a SAHM.