I was 22 and I have no regrets. I had a boyfriend in high school but I wasn't ready and he didn't pressure me. Then I dated a guy all through college who believed in waiting until marriage so we didn't have sex. When we broke up I knew I was ready to have sex but didn't want to sleep with a random guy either. I became friends with a guy and it turned into a friends with benefits type of situation. I knew he wasn't relationship material but I liked him and trusted him so I had sex with him.
I think waiting until I was older helped me separate sex and emotional attachment. I can have sex for fun. It doesn't have to emotional.

^and, yes, in some situations the women are indeed shallow and impatient jerks. But we're also talking about the context of a few dates as opposed to a months long relationship.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 20. I don't regret it for the age. I don't care about the age. But I got played huge and was too naive to realize it. The guy courted (and I mean chased) me for almost 6 months. I thought he was madly in love with me. And I fell hard for him. As soon as we had sex though, he dumped me and moved on. I had NO IDEA that was going to happen. I thought I had a great romance with a great boyfriend. Took me a very long time to trust after that.

That happened to me at the age of 45. If someone lies to you, there isn't much to do about it. Six months is a long time for a man to pursue just for sex.

It's funny how women assume that he was just a jerk, as opposed to maybe he just didn't enjoy having sex with her.

I guess the former is easier to believe than the latter.

So he was an impatient, shallow jerk who through a nice girl away because she didn't have all the moves down yet. Is that better?

Women do this all the time. Does that make women "impatient, shallow jerks"?

Women pursue naive, inexperienced men for 6 months straight and then as soon as they sleep with them dump them the next day? Uh, no. That is not at all common.

I have heard of women sleeping with a guy fairly early on, not being impressed and then opting not to go out with the guy again. That does happen.

I was 13 years old. My best friend at the time (also 13 years old) had sex with a man who was 21 years old. She felt extreme guilt about it and somehow convinced me, a sad, insecure little girl to have sex with her boyfriend’s younger, 15 year old brother. I did the deed, ran to the bathroom to bleed, and went home feeling ashamed and unprepared. I got my period two years later, when I was 15. My former friend is now married to this guy and has something like 5 children and a HHI that couldn’t be more than 30k, but I haven’t spoken to her in maybe 15 years, so who knows. I went on to abstain from sex completely until about age 17. While I don’t think sex is shameful I do believe that the circumstances that I lost my virginity under were completely inappropriate. Perhaps if I had had better parents this would have been easier for me to avoid. For the record, both of us girls were sexually abused by our fathers (no intercourse in my case) for years prior to losing our virginity.

On one hand I don't regret it. I thought about it a long time and decided I was ready, and was not pressured into it at all. However, I now would tell a girl that age that she is too young to handle sex, so through the eyes of a 40-something woman, I think I could have benefitted from waiting another couple years.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 20. I don't regret it for the age. I don't care about the age. But I got played huge and was too naive to realize it. The guy courted (and I mean chased) me for almost 6 months. I thought he was madly in love with me. And I fell hard for him. As soon as we had sex though, he dumped me and moved on. I had NO IDEA that was going to happen. I thought I had a great romance with a great boyfriend. Took me a very long time to trust after that.

That happened to me at the age of 45. If someone lies to you, there isn't much to do about it. Six months is a long time for a man to pursue just for sex.

It's funny how women assume that he was just a jerk, as opposed to maybe he just didn't enjoy having sex with her.

I guess the former is easier to believe than the latter.

So he was an impatient, shallow jerk who through a nice girl away because she didn't have all the moves down yet. Is that better?

Women do this all the time. Does that make women "impatient, shallow jerks"?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 20. I don't regret it for the age. I don't care about the age. But I got played huge and was too naive to realize it. The guy courted (and I mean chased) me for almost 6 months. I thought he was madly in love with me. And I fell hard for him. As soon as we had sex though, he dumped me and moved on. I had NO IDEA that was going to happen. I thought I had a great romance with a great boyfriend. Took me a very long time to trust after that.

That happened to me at the age of 45. If someone lies to you, there isn't much to do about it. Six months is a long time for a man to pursue just for sex.

It's funny how women assume that he was just a jerk, as opposed to maybe he just didn't enjoy having sex with her.

I guess the former is easier to believe than the latter.

So he was an impatient, shallow jerk who through a nice girl away because she didn't have all the moves down yet. Is that better?

I don't regret it. I was 16. My girlfriends and I decided that we were over being virgins, and we were going to race to see who could have sex first. Was this the best approach? Maybe not, but now that I look back, it was pretty empowering to decide to lose our virginity on our own terms.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Did it bother you that your husband had more experience than you? Did you ever wonder if you were not up to par?

No, it didn't bother me at all and to be honest I liked that he did have experience. I've never worried about not being up to par and I caught on pretty fast. I was nervous of course, but I was really looking forward to sex and being sexual. With sex there is always a learning curve. Even 18 years in we are still both discovering new things to try or new ways to turn each other on.

That's the important thing!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 20. I don't regret it for the age. I don't care about the age. But I got played huge and was too naive to realize it. The guy courted (and I mean chased) me for almost 6 months. I thought he was madly in love with me. And I fell hard for him. As soon as we had sex though, he dumped me and moved on. I had NO IDEA that was going to happen. I thought I had a great romance with a great boyfriend. Took me a very long time to trust after that.

That happened to me at the age of 45. If someone lies to you, there isn't much to do about it. Six months is a long time for a man to pursue just for sex.

It's funny how women assume that he was just a jerk, as opposed to maybe he just didn't enjoy having sex with her.

I guess the former is easier to believe than the latter.

I was 15, the age of consent in my country. But i had wanted to have sex for at least a year before that. The problem was that i couldn't find a guy willing to do it. I finally had to seduce the school "tough guy" to achieve my goal. It felt gorgeous. I never had any regrets.

No way - I was 17, glad I didn't get pregant then but that's the best age

Anonymous wrote:I was 22, and DYING to lose my virginity. So I slept with someone that I was casually dating and thought it wouldn't lead to anything. Now we are married with three kids. I kind of wish I had slept around more!

Oh wow! My partners have never led to anything serious. I'm definitely shocked by this.

Anonymous wrote:

Did it bother you that your husband had more experience than you? Did you ever wonder if you were not up to par?

No, it didn't bother me at all and to be honest I liked that he did have experience. I've never worried about not being up to par and I caught on pretty fast. I was nervous of course, but I was really looking forward to sex and being sexual. With sex there is always a learning curve. Even 18 years in we are still both discovering new things to try or new ways to turn each other on.

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Anonymous wrote:
I'm curious PP, why not the night of your wedding?

We were both tispy and exhausted. DH told me a couple years later that he was very nervous about being with a virgin and he didn't think being intoxicated would help. We did shower together and that was so crazy intimate for a girl who had done nothing more than make out with a boy. Next day was a long plane ride to our honeymoon. We were pretty much ripping each others clothes off the minute the hotel room door shut though, we had waited long enough.

Did it bother you that your husband had more experience than you? Did you ever wonder if you were not up to par?