Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 19:35     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I am a second wife. My DH left his ex-wife for me. We didn't start seeing each other until after he had moved out of their home and the marriage was rocky at that point. However, he ultimately left her for me.

I hate to break it to some of you bitter ex-wives, but life turned out just fine for us. We got custody of both of my stepchildren when they were 4 and 7. They are adults now. I have a great relationship with both of them. They consider this "home". Their mother wasn't abusive. She wasn't a drug user or an alcoholic. We were just able to show the judge that it would be in best interest of the kids to live with us. The Guardian ad Litem assigned to our case recommended we get custody and that pretty much won the case for us. She got every other weekend and four weeks during the summer.

So...contrary to what many of you might want to believe, life is pretty damn good. Money is not an issue. We are not paying any child support at all. We did pay child support for two years ($2,700 a month in Georgia), but that gravy train stopped when we got custody of the kids. We were able to successfully blend our families - I had two, he had two, we have one together. They are all very close and consider each other brothers and sisters in every way because they were raised together. And we've been married over 20 years.

My advise as an ex-wife who was royally screwed by an ex-husband. Let go of the anger and bitterness. Life goes on. You don't have to forgive. But holding onto anger only hurts you and your children.



You sing a pretty tune but wait till he leaves you for something young, tight and pretty.


Says another bitter ex-wife!
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 19:14     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:I am a second wife. My DH left his ex-wife for me. We didn't start seeing each other until after he had moved out of their home and the marriage was rocky at that point. However, he ultimately left her for me.

I hate to break it to some of you bitter ex-wives, but life turned out just fine for us. We got custody of both of my stepchildren when they were 4 and 7. They are adults now. I have a great relationship with both of them. They consider this "home". Their mother wasn't abusive. She wasn't a drug user or an alcoholic. We were just able to show the judge that it would be in best interest of the kids to live with us. The Guardian ad Litem assigned to our case recommended we get custody and that pretty much won the case for us. She got every other weekend and four weeks during the summer.

So...contrary to what many of you might want to believe, life is pretty damn good. Money is not an issue. We are not paying any child support at all. We did pay child support for two years ($2,700 a month in Georgia), but that gravy train stopped when we got custody of the kids. We were able to successfully blend our families - I had two, he had two, we have one together. They are all very close and consider each other brothers and sisters in every way because they were raised together. And we've been married over 20 years.

My advise as an ex-wife who was royally screwed by an ex-husband. Let go of the anger and bitterness. Life goes on. You don't have to forgive. But holding onto anger only hurts you and your children.



You sing a pretty tune but wait till he leaves you for something young, tight and pretty.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 19:10     Subject: All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:Men who can't sustain their first marriage are losers.


TRUE!
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 15:44     Subject: All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:I cant believe the evil bitch pp who is bragging about having taken young kids away from their mother. Do you want a cookie?

wtf is wrong with you.


Hey, I didn't "take them away". The judge is the one who made that decision. He knew that we would do a much better job ensuring the children were well taken care of. Their mother isn't a horrible person. But a cat is a better mother. She is one of those women who probably never should have had kids. I'm glad she did because I adore my step-kids. But she lacks even the most basic maternal instinct. She and the kids have a good relationship now, but it's not a mother/child relationship. She is more like a good friend or a fun aunt. I am the one they refer to as "mom".

My point was not to brag about winning custody. This thread is full of angry ex-wives who are convinced that there is no way a second wife could ever be happy. Well, I'm a second wife. We've been married over 20 years. And all is well. I'm also an ex-wife. My ex and I have a good relationship despite a really nasty divorce. I chose not to stay angry and bitter. Life is too short for that.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 15:30     Subject: All Second Wives are awesome
I cant believe the evil bitch pp who is bragging about having taken young kids away from their mother. Do you want a cookie?

wtf is wrong with you.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 15:09     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I am a second wife. My DH left his ex-wife for me. We didn't start seeing each other until after he had moved out of their home and the marriage was rocky at that point. However, he ultimately left her for me.

I hate to break it to some of you bitter ex-wives, but life turned out just fine for us. We got custody of both of my stepchildren when they were 4 and 7. They are adults now. I have a great relationship with both of them. They consider this "home". Their mother wasn't abusive. She wasn't a drug user or an alcoholic. We were just able to show the judge that it would be in best interest of the kids to live with us. The Guardian ad Litem assigned to our case recommended we get custody and that pretty much won the case for us. She got every other weekend and four weeks during the summer.

So...contrary to what many of you might want to believe, life is pretty damn good. Money is not an issue. We are not paying any child support at all. We did pay child support for two years ($2,700 a month in Georgia), but that gravy train stopped when we got custody of the kids. We were able to successfully blend our families - I had two, he had two, we have one together. They are all very close and consider each other brothers and sisters in every way because they were raised together. And we've been married over 20 years.

My advise as an ex-wife who was royally screwed by an ex-husband. Let go of the anger and bitterness. Life goes on. You don't have to forgive. But holding onto anger only hurts you and your children. tse


Something about this storyt doesn't add up.

A modern judge ((in a not-backwater county in the South who is not golfing partners with the divorcing father)) would NEVER award basically sole custody of a 4 year old when a healthy, mentally sharp, non-parolee mother is arguing for some equal share of custody.

Your life might be all roses, but your backstory seems off. At least in 2015 outside of honey boo boo land


This was in 14 years ago in Atlanta, Georgia. Not "backwater county" at all. And we didn't get sole custody. My DH and his ex had joint legal custody, but he had primary physical custody. It happens a lot more often than you might think. The Guardian ad Litem recommendation is what won the case, in my opinion. Family Law Judges make weird decisions all the time. We did not expect to walk about with primary physical custody.

It happened to a good friend of mine just two years ago. Her kids were 12 and 14. They told the court they wanted to live with their dad. The judge gave dad primary custody. Mom ended up with every other weekend and a few weeks during the summer. A year later, dad moved across the country with the kids with the permission of the court. He just had to agree to pay for airline tickets twice a year.

Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 14:56     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:I am a second wife. My DH left his ex-wife for me. We didn't start seeing each other until after he had moved out of their home and the marriage was rocky at that point. However, he ultimately left her for me.

I hate to break it to some of you bitter ex-wives, but life turned out just fine for us. We got custody of both of my stepchildren when they were 4 and 7. They are adults now. I have a great relationship with both of them. They consider this "home". Their mother wasn't abusive. She wasn't a drug user or an alcoholic. We were just able to show the judge that it would be in best interest of the kids to live with us. The Guardian ad Litem assigned to our case recommended we get custody and that pretty much won the case for us. She got every other weekend and four weeks during the summer.

So...contrary to what many of you might want to believe, life is pretty damn good. Money is not an issue. We are not paying any child support at all. We did pay child support for two years ($2,700 a month in Georgia), but that gravy train stopped when we got custody of the kids. We were able to successfully blend our families - I had two, he had two, we have one together. They are all very close and consider each other brothers and sisters in every way because they were raised together. And we've been married over 20 years.

My advise as an ex-wife who was royally screwed by an ex-husband. Let go of the anger and bitterness. Life goes on. You don't have to forgive. But holding onto anger only hurts you and your children. tse


Something about this storyt doesn't add up.

A modern judge ((in a not-backwater county in the South who is not golfing partners with the divorcing father)) would NEVER award basically sole custody of a 4 year old when a healthy, mentally sharp, non-parolee mother is arguing for some equal share of custody.

Your life might be all roses, but your backstory seems off. At least in 2015 outside of honey boo boo land
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 14:06     Subject: All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:I'm the second wife, and I am awesome. Mostly because I don't cheat on DH like the first one did. But also because I'm not crazy.


+1
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 13:38     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
I am a second wife. My DH left his ex-wife for me. We didn't start seeing each other until after he had moved out of their home and the marriage was rocky at that point. However, he ultimately left her for me.

I hate to break it to some of you bitter ex-wives, but life turned out just fine for us. We got custody of both of my stepchildren when they were 4 and 7. They are adults now. I have a great relationship with both of them. They consider this "home". Their mother wasn't abusive. She wasn't a drug user or an alcoholic. We were just able to show the judge that it would be in best interest of the kids to live with us. The Guardian ad Litem assigned to our case recommended we get custody and that pretty much won the case for us. She got every other weekend and four weeks during the summer.

So...contrary to what many of you might want to believe, life is pretty damn good. Money is not an issue. We are not paying any child support at all. We did pay child support for two years ($2,700 a month in Georgia), but that gravy train stopped when we got custody of the kids. We were able to successfully blend our families - I had two, he had two, we have one together. They are all very close and consider each other brothers and sisters in every way because they were raised together. And we've been married over 20 years.

My advise as an ex-wife who was royally screwed by an ex-husband. Let go of the anger and bitterness. Life goes on. You don't have to forgive. But holding onto anger only hurts you and your children.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 13:11     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Hmmm. I've never wanted to be second at anything in life. Thankfully, I met a hot, smart and successful 25-year old when I was the same age. Both our salaries went through the roof in the first 5 years of our marriage.

My DH despises non-ambitious, non-intelligent women. Pretty gold-digger proof. You can spot then a mile away.


Lots of young attractive and intelligent women who are very accomplished that are available for the successful older man. Why settle for the older woman who is well past her prime in terms of looks and on a descending trajectory when there is the alternative of an attractive younger woman?



Hmm. Maybe because they married her when she was young/successful and honor commitment.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 12:29     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:Hmmm. I've never wanted to be second at anything in life. Thankfully, I met a hot, smart and successful 25-year old when I was the same age. Both our salaries went through the roof in the first 5 years of our marriage.

My DH despises non-ambitious, non-intelligent women. Pretty gold-digger proof. You can spot then a mile away.


Lots of young attractive and intelligent women who are very accomplished that are available for the successful older man. Why settle for the older woman who is well past her prime in terms of looks and on a descending trajectory when there is the alternative of an attractive younger woman?

Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 10:14     Subject: All Second Wives are awesome
It's weird that so many posters assume the second wife broke up the marriage.

I know plenty of second wives. They all met their husbands well after the divorce.

Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 09:50     Subject: Re:All Second Wives are awesome
Muslima wrote:I thought this was about polygamy


Good one!
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 09:44     Subject: All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Funniest part of this thread by far is the delusional ranting of the "first wives." Yeah sure honey, whatever it takes for you not to recognize that as men move into middle age, they make a shit ton more money and generally get more attractive (outliers aside). Meanwhile you you wrinkle up and get more bitter and angry. If I were a married woman with kids and a reasonably good life I'd get very realistic about my "free market" options as compared to my husband's, and act accordingly. That might help some of you avoid the angry solitude evident in the posts of some of these old chickens.


I don't know too many women who had trouble landing a second husband. Thats all in your head.

Some men aren't worth keeping around, even if there are monetary dividends to reap. Misery isn't worth it. As I plan to marry at 40ish, I am grateful to his first wife. He knows where it went wrong and is trying a lot harder to be a good guy. He speaks of her fondly and I don't have any ill feelings towards her. Bless that woman for breaking him in.


What is the divorce rate for second marriages?


Divorce rates have been misquoted for a very long time. Newer research suggests it isn't ridiculously high, like previously thought. I think second marriages are far less likely to be dragged out "for the kids." I wish there were statistics on happy and unhappy first and second marriages.
Anonymous
Post 01/17/2015 09:41     Subject: All Second Wives are awesome
Anonymous wrote:Men who can't sustain their first marriage are losers.


Women aren't responsible?