Drinking alcohol is the same as taking Valium or any other drug but drinkers are blind to that. Would your husband say to you " You are do uptight, who doesn't take Valium or Percocet on their birthday. You are such a square." It is a liquid drug but everyone is obsessed with it and it always gets a pass. Your husband sounds like he is sixteen.

Anonymous wrote:I think people who do not drink are a) an alcoholic b) religious or c) somewhat of a control freak who cannot relax.

I don't care if people don't drink but I have never met a person who doesn't drink for reasons a or b that isn't a judge mental prude who thinks anyone who does drink is an alcoholic. They have generally been horrible people who are no fun.

Judgmental huh?

I wouldn't assume anything. There can be lots of reasons not to drink.

The people I can't stand are the ones who pressure you to drink if you aren't in the mood/can't for some reason or treat a person badly if you won't . They're the assholes. Sounds like your husband has joined their camp.

No. I usually don't drink, but not because I am uptight. Ever since I turned 40, if I have even a glass of wine or beer in the evening, I randomly wake up at 5 am. I hate it.

Yep, this is me too. And if I have more than just a glass, I wake up at 3am and cannot get back to sleep. It's a clear choice. Sleep wins most times.


So if you're going to a nice dinner, holiday party, etc you pop a sleeping pill before bed. Problem solved. Cheers!


If that obvious solution worked, don't you think we would just do it?


This is the only reason I have an ambien prescription. It's how I sleep after weddings, holiday parties, girls night out... Probably use it about 2x month.

Good that it worked for you. Unfortunately it does not for me. Ambien gets me to go to sleep easily, but causes me to wake up around 5-5:30 regardless of whether I drink alcohol with it.

I'm a non drinker (religious reasons) and I don't think I'm uptight or a prude. I hate for people to make an issue of my not drinking so conversely I would never make an issue of someone who is drinking; I can't imagine being that person who says "no thanks -- I don't need alcohol to have a good time." Rather I say "thanks but I think I'll grab a coke/water."

As for how I think people view me -- honestly from 18-25, not drinking was a pretty big deal. People in college do look at you like you're weird or lame or anti-social or something and that continued through law school. I don't go around saying it was due to religion, nor did I hang out with many people of my faith -- so it was an issue that came up with "regular" people.

From 25-28, I think people thought I wasn't fun initially, but I was more open about the fact that it was due to religion and then when they realized I could still hang out/go out with them -- it was like "whatever."

From 28+, no one ever asks or cares or says anything if I don't order a drink. Honestly I think it's bc as you get older there are lots of people who used to be able to drink a lot who just can't handle it anymore or may have a health issue or may be trying -- so people just don't go there. People around me know me well -- I'm the type of person that can barely handle the caffeine effects of 2 cups of coffee in the same day so people tend to say "yeah -- it's best you not even try drinking."

Alchohol often gives me bad headache and makes me really tired. Once in a while I am able to relax and have good time after drinking, but usually not.

Anonymous wrote:I think people who do not drink are a) an alcoholic b) religious or c) somewhat of a control freak who cannot relax.

I don't care if people don't drink but I have never met a person who doesn't drink for reasons a or b that isn't a judge mental prude who thinks anyone who does drink is an alcoholic. They have generally been horrible people who are no fun.

Agree with this, but I'd add d) someone who's seen alcohol really damage someone else, or screw up a family, etc. You really lose your taste for it when it destroys others you love.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I assume they are a bit, yes. Or pregnant/trying in the case of a woman.

However the issue here seems to be your husband...is this something he is just learning about you?

Nope, he's known this about me since the beginning. For some reason, it's a problem now.

Does he drink too much? I find the people who want to pressure others to drink, have issues drinking themselves.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I do. It may not be a fair judgement, but it's generally true in my experience. I'm sure if asked, they wouldn't say they were uptight, so I'm not surprised at some of these responses.

Your post is such a sad commentary on many people's viewpoint about drinking. It can put pressure on those who don't need to be drinking.

Of all the posts here, mine is the sad commentary? I don't know how you gathered that my privately held opinion pressures anyone, but this is exactly what I meant. Drink or don't drink, I don't really care, but in my experience people who don't simply out of choice, and not due to a medical reason, tend to be uptight and perhaps a bit self important. Most people don't give a shit, but you insist that they do.

Not YOUR privately held opinion, but cumulatively speaking--the sense that many people feel as you do. You do seem to give a shit.

I think people who do not drink are a) an alcoholic b) religious or c) somewhat of a control freak who cannot relax.

I don't care if people don't drink but I have never met a person who doesn't drink for reasons a or b that isn't a judge mental prude who thinks anyone who does drink is an alcoholic. They have generally been horrible people who are no fun.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I do. It may not be a fair judgement, but it's generally true in my experience. I'm sure if asked, they wouldn't say they were uptight, so I'm not surprised at some of these responses.

Your post is such a sad commentary on many people's viewpoint about drinking. It can put pressure on those who don't need to be drinking.

Of all the posts here, mine is the sad commentary? I don't know how you gathered that my privately held opinion pressures anyone, but this is exactly what I meant. Drink or don't drink, I don't really care, but in my experience people who don't simply out of choice, and not due to a medical reason, tend to be uptight and perhaps a bit self important. Most people don't give a shit, but you insist that they do.

Anonymous wrote:I just can't imagine going to a nice dinner or being on vacation and not having a drink. Do you know what you're missing?? I don't think you're uptight but perhaps unsophisticated...

You may not be old enough to have friends and family members who fall down a very slippery slope trying to be "sophisticated."

Yes.

Anonymous wrote:

No. I usually don't drink, but not because I am uptight. Ever since I turned 40, if I have even a glass of wine or beer in the evening, I randomly wake up at 5 am. I hate it.

Yep, this is me too. And if I have more than just a glass, I wake up at 3am and cannot get back to sleep. It's a clear choice. Sleep wins most times.


So if you're going to a nice dinner, holiday party, etc you pop a sleeping pill before bed. Problem solved. Cheers!

If that obvious solution worked, don't you think we would just do it?

This is the only reason I have an ambien prescription. It's how I sleep after weddings, holiday parties, girls night out... Probably use it about 2x month.

No. I usually don't drink, but not because I am uptight. Ever since I turned 40, if I have even a glass of wine or beer in the evening, I randomly wake up at 5 am. I hate it.

Yep, this is me too. And if I have more than just a glass, I wake up at 3am and cannot get back to sleep. It's a clear choice. Sleep wins most times.


So if you're going to a nice dinner, holiday party, etc you pop a sleeping pill before bed. Problem solved. Cheers!

If that obvious solution worked, don't you think we would just do it?