Anonymous wrote:This sounds like a more extreme version of what I'll call early adolescent "embarassing family" syndrom. All of my kids went through a stage where everything DH and I did was super embarassing to him. Our singing was just intolerably uncool. Siblings were uncool and annoying. This sounds similar but also a bit over the top if he's super angry. Can you talk to him about it?

Maybe this. But I remember seeing this as a power play on my mother's part. She'd have me trapped in the car, at the mercy of her singing. The singing and the brother's noise can be perceived as dominating the room. It grates and the person subjected to these noises is helpless. I'm sure he didn't start out with this "over reacting." He's probably just really frustrated at this point. He doesn't get the down time he needs to transition (in the car) or at home (the singing, the brother's noise), when he's trying to study or otherwise have time to think.

Limit the singing somehow, so that he knows you're acknowledging his mental space. Also, gift him with a noise cancellation headset. It's an easy fix.

Sounds like a great kid you've got there. There's no reason to keep him at the mercy of these distractions, unless it truly is a power play on your part.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like OCD. Any recent strep in him, family members, or friends?

What I'd the step connection??

I think the pp is suggesting looking into PANDAS. I know one child who has it-- he has OCD and is math genius. Has had a lot of health problems.

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like OCD. Any recent strep in him, family members, or friends?

What I'd the step connection??

My DS14 is the same way about certain noises. He now wears noise-cancelling headphones alot and he is very happy. I think he figured out the solution to the issue he was having himself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to update the thread and say thanks to all who gave advice.

He has been diagnosed with ODD. He is in therapy. Exposure response prevention therapy.

Unfortunately, he has had some ocd symptoms for a few years. I wish he told me.

Thanks for the update. Glad he's getting help. I hope it makes life easier for him going forward!

Meanwhile, knowing what you do now, any advice about clues or other things to look for? I can see how kids might keep these things to themselves, either intentionally or just because they don't think to share them.

I just noticed I wrote ODD. I meant OCD.
Good question, I wish i didn't brush off the symptoms at the start. All doors needed to be shut etc. I thought he was just controlling. It seems to have gotten bad over the last year. I swear I didn't see symptoms before that.
I have thought about it and I just didn't.
He says it started at 8-9 but I didn't see it. He was the perfect child in so many ways, never any problems at school etc.

Thanks for the update- it's quite possible to hide OCD and anxiety. Is there a chance that your thirteen year old also has ADHD? I'm bringing it up because I had some fairly severe anxiety for awhile-- my son has ADHD and when I watch the specifics of how he struggles, I realize that I may have ADHD. They conditions often coexist or ADHD could be driving the anxiety-- it's all about self-regulation, know what I mean? My son is also exceptionally gifted and it led to a later diagnosis.

I am fairly sure he doesn't have adhd. It's ocd, mild. He is gifted.
I am really hoping therapy works.
I do think older one with adhd has some anxiety.
Ahhh, I wish life could be easier.

app here who mentioned ADHD- I'm glad the OCD is mild. It will get better with therapy especially since you've caught it before he's an adult.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to update the thread and say thanks to all who gave advice.

He has been diagnosed with ODD. He is in therapy. Exposure response prevention therapy.

Unfortunately, he has had some ocd symptoms for a few years. I wish he told me.

Thanks for the update. Glad he's getting help. I hope it makes life easier for him going forward!

Meanwhile, knowing what you do now, any advice about clues or other things to look for? I can see how kids might keep these things to themselves, either intentionally or just because they don't think to share them.

I just noticed I wrote ODD. I meant OCD.
Good question, I wish i didn't brush off the symptoms at the start. All doors needed to be shut etc. I thought he was just controlling. It seems to have gotten bad over the last year. I swear I didn't see symptoms before that.
I have thought about it and I just didn't.
He says it started at 8-9 but I didn't see it. He was the perfect child in so many ways, never any problems at school etc.

Thanks for the update- it's quite possible to hide OCD and anxiety. Is there a chance that your thirteen year old also has ADHD? I'm bringing it up because I had some fairly severe anxiety for awhile-- my son has ADHD and when I watch the specifics of how he struggles, I realize that I may have ADHD. They conditions often coexist or ADHD could be driving the anxiety-- it's all about self-regulation, know what I mean? My son is also exceptionally gifted and it led to a later diagnosis.

I am fairly sure he doesn't have adhd. It's ocd, mild. He is gifted.
I am really hoping therapy works.
I do think older one with adhd has some anxiety.
Ahhh, I wish life could be easier.

Anonymous wrote:This sounds like a more extreme version of what I'll call early adolescent "embarassing family" syndrom. All of my kids went through a stage where everything DH and I did was super embarassing to him. Our singing was just intolerably uncool. Siblings were uncool and annoying. This sounds similar but also a bit over the top if he's super angry. Can you talk to him about it?

Also agree. But, I have to side with your son on getting annoyed by the things that your other son does. My ADHD son does similar things. Sometimes I don't even notice it and sometimes it drives me right out of my mind - and I am the most tolerant in our family.

Look he is who he is. Maybe your singing is awful maybe the toe-tapping is maddening.

I am 46 and I cannot stand to hear people sniff. I feel like my head is going to explode.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to update the thread and say thanks to all who gave advice.

He has been diagnosed with ODD. He is in therapy. Exposure response prevention therapy.

Unfortunately, he has had some ocd symptoms for a few years. I wish he told me.

Thanks for the update. Glad he's getting help. I hope it makes life easier for him going forward!

Meanwhile, knowing what you do now, any advice about clues or other things to look for? I can see how kids might keep these things to themselves, either intentionally or just because they don't think to share them.

I just noticed I wrote ODD. I meant OCD.
Good question, I wish i didn't brush off the symptoms at the start. All doors needed to be shut etc. I thought he was just controlling. It seems to have gotten bad over the last year. I swear I didn't see symptoms before that.
I have thought about it and I just didn't.
He says it started at 8-9 but I didn't see it. He was the perfect child in so many ways, never any problems at school etc.

Thanks for the update- it's quite possible to hide OCD and anxiety. Is there a chance that your thirteen year old also has ADHD? I'm bringing it up because I had some fairly severe anxiety for awhile-- my son has ADHD and when I watch the specifics of how he struggles, I realize that I may have ADHD. They conditions often coexist or ADHD could be driving the anxiety-- it's all about self-regulation, know what I mean? My son is also exceptionally gifted and it led to a later diagnosis.

Google hyperacusis

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to update the thread and say thanks to all who gave advice.

He has been diagnosed with ODD. He is in therapy. Exposure response prevention therapy.

Unfortunately, he has had some ocd symptoms for a few years. I wish he told me.

Thanks for the update. Glad he's getting help. I hope it makes life easier for him going forward!

Meanwhile, knowing what you do now, any advice about clues or other things to look for? I can see how kids might keep these things to themselves, either intentionally or just because they don't think to share them.

I just noticed I wrote ODD. I meant OCD.
Good question, I wish i didn't brush off the symptoms at the start. All doors needed to be shut etc. I thought he was just controlling. It seems to have gotten bad over the last year. I swear I didn't see symptoms before that.
I have thought about it and I just didn't.
He says it started at 8-9 but I didn't see it. He was the perfect child in so many ways, never any problems at school etc.

Anonymous wrote:I wanted to update the thread and say thanks to all who gave advice.

He has been diagnosed with ODD. He is in therapy. Exposure response prevention therapy.

Unfortunately, he has had some ocd symptoms for a few years. I wish he told me.

Thanks for the update. Glad he's getting help. I hope it makes life easier for him going forward!

Meanwhile, knowing what you do now, any advice about clues or other things to look for? I can see how kids might keep these things to themselves, either intentionally or just because they don't think to share them.

I agree with misphonia. My DH has this. Noises like sniffling, toe-tapping, and food-crunching send him over the edge. It's taken many (adult) years to get him to just leave the room when he can't take it, rather than lay into the "offender."

I wanted to update the thread and say thanks to all who gave advice.

He has been diagnosed with ODD. He is in therapy. Exposure response prevention therapy.

Unfortunately, he has had some ocd symptoms for a few years. I wish he told me.

My 11 yo son is so much like this. can't stand chewing/lip smacking noises, can't take the smell of cheese or fresh cut fruits like cantelope. We try to give him a break, and let him eat in another room, but other times, when things are more easy going, enourage him to stay with us and cope. It will be a life long issue, but I am sure he will learn to cope. And he does cope at school. And for some reason, home is worse. I read with misophonia, it is the family that drives the kids the most crazy. I think it is due to the emotional attachment.

Funny, spouse has similary issues.