Anonymous wrote:15:24-- Some families spend hundreds on Lax and other sports/activities and dance teams and cheers teams can be expensive. I am happy she will finance her passion in about 13 months when she graduates next year.

Anonymous wrote: . . . . also have to spend money taking your daughter out on dates.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Any discussion relative to the amount of allowance for your sons vs daughters?

No, they both get the same amount.

Why in the world would they need different amounts?

Hmmmm. Let me think. No, can't imagine a single difference. Oh, except clothes, bras, Rx's, makeup, tampons, better and more shampoo, conditioner, moisturizer, sunscreen, razors. All these may not be "necessities" for DD but they are things she uses most days that cost more than her brother.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any discussion relative to the amount of allowance for your sons vs daughters?

No, they both get the same amount.

Why in the world would they need different amounts?

Hmmmm. Let me think. No, can't imagine a single difference. Oh, except clothes, bras, Rx's, makeup, tampons, better and more shampoo, conditioner, moisturizer, sunscreen, razors. All these may not be "necessities" for DD but they are things she uses most days that cost more than her brother.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any discussion relative to the amount of allowance for your sons vs daughters?

We're dealing with this now. DD spends way more than her brother on "necessities" (lots of health and beauty stuff, Rx's and clothes, not to mention the spay tans and manicures she'd like routinely).

Your first problem is that your DD has tacitly understood things like spray tans and manicures to be "necessities."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any discussion relative to the amount of allowance for your sons vs daughters?

No, they both get the same amount.

Why in the world would they need different amounts?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any discussion relative to the amount of allowance for your sons vs daughters?

We're dealing with this now. DD spends way more than her brother on "necessities" (lots of health and beauty stuff, Rx's and clothes, not to mention the spay tans and manicures she'd like routinely).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any discussion relative to the amount of allowance for your sons vs daughters?

No, they both get the same amount.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure most of us here went to college. Did you really find it to be full time job? I went to a top college, worked hard, got good grades. Still had plenty of time to work 10-12 hours a week and play hard, too. Best time of my life. Working a bit didn't get in the way of any of it, and it provided me with spending money and some interesting experiences. Oh yeah, met DH at the job, too.

Yes. I had a ton of undiagnosed learning disabilities. Home work that took you one hour took me three. You studied for an hour, while I met with a tutor for two hours and then studied further on my own for two hours. I was so relieved when everyone went out at night to party, because that meant the dorms would be quieter and I'd get distracted less often. In the mornings while you were sleeping off a hangover I was back at my desk trying to get through what was taught but I hadn't learned. And I didn't go to a hard school. I could have gone to 7th grade at age 18 and would have struggled just as much. I went to the easiest school that would give me a degree which would lead to a full-time job. You called your mom to talk all about the interesting things you were learning and boys you were dating while I called my mom to ask her to explain assignments to me and what she thought the teacher meant. Maybe you went to a professor's office hours once a semester? I went almost once a week. I worked my ASS off in college. It was much more than a full time job. I did not have time to work part time or "play hard." Oh and I didn't get good grades. I passed. And I was relieved to pass because sometimes I failed despite working hard. School is simply not my thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daddy pays. Do they outgrow that mentality?

Absolutely. I am proof of that. When I was in 11th grade and got a driving permit, my father gave me an "emergency credit card." It had my name on it but the bill went to him. I was to use it in any sort of driving emergency. In 12th grade, I would often get sent on errands (pharmacy, supermarket, post office) and get told to pay for the errands with the credit card. I took the credit card to college. Again, it was only for some sort of huge emergency. My parents deposited $200 a month into a bank for me, which I could pull out with an ATM card. I never used the credit card. After college, maybe 6 months after I'd been working full time, I'd gotten my own credit card. I handed the emergency credit card back to my dad one day. "I haven't used this in a really long time. The credit limit on my cc is $2,000. Thanks, but I don't think I need this backup any more."

My parents gave me juuuuuuust enough that I didn't have to struggle, but DID have to plan and budget. It left me respectful of how much things cost, the concept of saving, etc. That's why I give my college-aged kids (and being that each headed off to college at 16, they WERE kids) money. Again, enough that they can get by, IF they pay attention to sales, and budget wisely.

*My guess for the twice-a-week salon visits: her kid is on a dance or cheer team. There are requirements for your hair, makeup, etc. My guess is the kid can't do her own hair the way the team requires, so she's going twice a week to have it done so she looks appropriate for games and appearances as a member of the team.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure most of us here went to college. Did you really find it to be full time job? I went to a top college, worked hard, got good grades. Still had plenty of time to work 10-12 hours a week and play hard, too. Best time of my life. Working a bit didn't get in the way of any of it, and it provided me with spending money and some interesting experiences. Oh yeah, met DH at the job, too.

Yes. I had a ton of undiagnosed learning disabilities. Home work that took you one hour took me three. You studied for an hour, while I met with a tutor for two hours and then studied further on my own for two hours. I was so relieved when everyone went out at night to party, because that meant the dorms would be quieter and I'd get distracted less often. In the mornings while you were sleeping off a hangover I was back at my desk trying to get through what was taught but I hadn't learned. And I didn't go to a hard school. I could have gone to 7th grade at age 18 and would have struggled just as much. I went to the easiest school that would give me a degree which would lead to a full-time job. You called your mom to talk all about the interesting things you were learning and boys you were dating while I called my mom to ask her to explain assignments to me and what she thought the teacher meant. Maybe you went to a professor's office hours once a semester? I went almost once a week. I worked my ASS off in college. It was much more than a full time job. I did not have time to work part time or "play hard." Oh and I didn't get good grades. I passed. And I was relieved to pass because sometimes I failed despite working hard. School is simply not my thing.

Similar to my DC, although it's not quite as much of a struggle. So working would be a challenge. Plus it's a small liberal arts school in a small town-very few jobs in the town for students and all the on campus jobs go to FA students. We give DC an allowance so time can be spent on school.

What does he do in the summer?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure most of us here went to college. Did you really find it to be full time job? I went to a top college, worked hard, got good grades. Still had plenty of time to work 10-12 hours a week and play hard, too. Best time of my life. Working a bit didn't get in the way of any of it, and it provided me with spending money and some interesting experiences. Oh yeah, met DH at the job, too.

Yes. I had a ton of undiagnosed learning disabilities. Home work that took you one hour took me three. You studied for an hour, while I met with a tutor for two hours and then studied further on my own for two hours. I was so relieved when everyone went out at night to party, because that meant the dorms would be quieter and I'd get distracted less often. In the mornings while you were sleeping off a hangover I was back at my desk trying to get through what was taught but I hadn't learned. And I didn't go to a hard school. I could have gone to 7th grade at age 18 and would have struggled just as much. I went to the easiest school that would give me a degree which would lead to a full-time job. You called your mom to talk all about the interesting things you were learning and boys you were dating while I called my mom to ask her to explain assignments to me and what she thought the teacher meant. Maybe you went to a professor's office hours once a semester? I went almost once a week. I worked my ASS off in college. It was much more than a full time job. I did not have time to work part time or "play hard." Oh and I didn't get good grades. I passed. And I was relieved to pass because sometimes I failed despite working hard. School is simply not my thing.

Similar to my DC, although it's not quite as much of a struggle. So working would be a challenge. Plus it's a small liberal arts school in a small town-very few jobs in the town for students and all the on campus jobs go to FA students. We give DC an allowance so time can be spent on school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure most of us here went to college. Did you really find it to be full time job? I went to a top college, worked hard, got good grades. Still had plenty of time to work 10-12 hours a week and play hard, too. Best time of my life. Working a bit didn't get in the way of any of it, and it provided me with spending money and some interesting experiences. Oh yeah, met DH at the job, too.

Yes. I had a ton of undiagnosed learning disabilities. Home work that took you one hour took me three. You studied for an hour, while I met with a tutor for two hours and then studied further on my own for two hours. I was so relieved when everyone went out at night to party, because that meant the dorms would be quieter and I'd get distracted less often. In the mornings while you were sleeping off a hangover I was back at my desk trying to get through what was taught but I hadn't learned. And I didn't go to a hard school. I could have gone to 7th grade at age 18 and would have struggled just as much. I went to the easiest school that would give me a degree which would lead to a full-time job. You called your mom to talk all about the interesting things you were learning and boys you were dating while I called my mom to ask her to explain assignments to me and what she thought the teacher meant. Maybe you went to a professor's office hours once a semester? I went almost once a week. I worked my ASS off in college. It was much more than a full time job. I did not have time to work part time or "play hard." Oh and I didn't get good grades. I passed. And I was relieved to pass because sometimes I failed despite working hard. School is simply not my thing.

Anonymous wrote:Any discussion relative to the amount of allowance for your sons vs daughters?