16 years? Oh hell no. I am 38 and would not even consider dating a 54 year old.

Second marriages fail and end in divorce a higher percent of the time than first marriages. They may marry 16 years apart, but it doesn't last.

Another depressing thread.

I think that it's best to focus on finding someone you like being around who also shares the same basic worldview/values you have (it doesn't have to be exactly the same, but the fundamental values should be).

Aside from that, an age difference of more than 8-10 years should involve an understanding on the part of both parties that you are going to be in very different stages of life at certain points in your relationship.

Essentially long-term relationships are about committing to not just the person in the present, but committing to growing together, understanding you and your partner will go through changes, as will your relationship.

An age difference of more than a decade means that you will be hitting huge biological/aging shifts at very different points in time. And that can pose a set of challenges above and beyond the usual LTR challenges of just the general ways people change over time and deal with life.

That's not to say it can't work out.

Aside from that, I do think that younger women (20s) are at a disadvantage when dating a man more than 10 years older. This is a generalization, but there is usually a power dynamic present that, in my view, can stunt a woman's growth at a time when she should be forging out a sense of independence and self. It's not quite the same as it is if she is in a relationship with a man who is the same age and also forging out his independence.

Anonymous wrote:I have noticed that the "perfect" age difference between men and women seems to be 16 years, the man being the older one. Whenever you hear about a man leaving his wife for a younger woman, the age difference always seems to be about 16 years -- I do not know why this is.

So under my theory, a man cannot start to date his "perfect" match until he is at least 35; and can no longer date a woman in her early 30s or younger once he is older than 48 years.

With large age differences those marriages have less of a chance of staying together or being happy.

OP didn't say anything wrong, it happens a lot.

What ridiculous bullshit.
My husband is 19 year older than me. We're not doing any better or worse than our friends.
I can't believe you would take as a positive example some douchebag who leaves his wife for another woman.
Shame on you, OP.

Anonymous wrote:My 56 year old father is dating a 32 year old. And she makes more money than him. But he acts like he's a teenager so I guess it works out for them.

My dad married someone that was almost 18 years younger. It didn't work once he was in his 70's with health problems. She was his nurse maid. People are in denial that it's too large of a age difference. It's not fair to your kids and an embarrassment if they are close in age.

My 56 year old father is dating a 32 year old. And she makes more money than him. But he acts like he's a teenager so I guess it works out for them.

I am 52 and my gf is 36 and it works with us. The only problem is that she wants a child and I don't (have a few from my marriage), so it looks like that relationship will fall apart just like the others.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have noticed that the "perfect" age difference between men and women seems to be 16 years, the man being the older one. Whenever you hear about a man leaving his wife for a younger woman, the age difference always seems to be about 16 years -- I do not know why this is.

So under my theory, a man cannot start to date his "perfect" match until he is at least 35; and can no longer date a woman in her early 30s or younger once he is older than 48 years.

You must be a fat, old loser trying to sell younger women on old penis. I dated a man who was 37 when I was 19. He was in the initial stages of ED (penis was only ever semi-hard) and was losing his hair. He was also very bitter about life. I collected some nice gifts from him and let him support me through school. Then I dumped him. I am now married to an optimistic, sweet man only three years older whose penis still gets rock hard and whose best years are still ahead of him.

You just sound like a gold-digging whore.

She sounds awesome. And SMART.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have noticed that the "perfect" age difference between men and women seems to be 16 years, the man being the older one. Whenever you hear about a man leaving his wife for a younger woman, the age difference always seems to be about 16 years -- I do not know why this is.

So under my theory, a man cannot start to date his "perfect" match until he is at least 35; and can no longer date a woman in her early 30s or younger once he is older than 48 years.

You must be a fat, old loser trying to sell younger women on old penis. I dated a man who was 37 when I was 19. He was in the initial stages of ED (penis was only ever semi-hard) and was losing his hair. He was also very bitter about life. I collected some nice gifts from him and let him support me through school. Then I dumped him. I am now married to an optimistic, sweet man only three years older whose penis still gets rock hard and whose best years are still ahead of him.

You just sound like a gold-digging whore.

The best deal is the find a guy your age who has a trust fund. You're golden then.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom is 15 years older than my stepdad, and they just celebrated their 25th anniversary. Just a random little share there.

Another share - my good friend is married to a man 15 years older, and she likes the money but him not so much. Regularly complains of life stage differences and lack of things and friends in common. They just had a baby and now she is 100% into that and they barely hang out, so I wonder how things will go in the future for them.

I am married to a man 2 years older than me, and when I complain that we don't have enough money he likes to tell me that I should have married a guy about 15 years older. But my DH is hot and we have a lot of fun together.

I am rambling really, but my conclusion is that the perfect thing is actually to find a guy your own age with a trust fund.

the perfect thing is to make your own money, and have your pick of men

No way! Then there won't be time for me to relax, shop, read, write, socialize, groom etc. etc. It would be WAY better to live on someone else's dime. Pff.

Anonymous wrote:My mom is 15 years older than my stepdad, and they just celebrated their 25th anniversary. Just a random little share there.

Another share - my good friend is married to a man 15 years older, and she likes the money but him not so much. Regularly complains of life stage differences and lack of things and friends in common. They just had a baby and now she is 100% into that and they barely hang out, so I wonder how things will go in the future for them.

I am married to a man 2 years older than me, and when I complain that we don't have enough money he likes to tell me that I should have married a guy about 15 years older. But my DH is hot and we have a lot of fun together.

I am rambling really, but my conclusion is that the perfect thing is actually to find a guy your own age with a trust fund.

the perfect thing is to make your own money, and have your pick of men

Anonymous wrote:I am the exception but I am 46 and dating a 65 year old man, a very young acting/looking active amazing man. I have yet to meet any 40 something years old who can hold a candle to him and the sex is off the charts. Age is nothing more than a number.

You expect to have an active sex life when you are 55 and he is 74??