If your post photos of your large new house (cough-McMansion-cough) on facebook:
25% of your friends will despise your taste;
25% of your friends will envy and hate you;
25% of your friends will love it without resentment;
25% of your friends won't even notice.

The thing is, you can't know in advance which friend will think what!

So don't post.

PS: I'm in the "despise your taste" category.

My best friend (friends 35 years) found the house online that we recently purchased. She stopped speaking to me because of the price. We have considerable income differences and careers that I minimized for years.

So either you are a rat lady or a person with a large house?

I don't understand the posters on this thread. That seems rather narrow minded, no? Were you joking, PP?

Most of my friends are doing very well in their lives. But I have seen mutual friends go off the rails about one aging better in looks or financially, and it is sad. To hear a grown adult go on about another tells me they have extremely poor coping mechanisms. And what else bothers them? Probably just about anything.

I am the same way. Mindful about not seeming like I am showing off even though that's not my intention. I moved up the ladder quickly in my twenties and was making crazy money by age 26. Meanwhile my friends back in the midwest were barely making above minimum wage. At the time, I boasted too much about my salary and pics of the house I had built, etc. The house wasn't even that large, but it was still a 326K brand new house for a 26-year-old single person. Meanwhile my friends were lucky to be renting an apartment.

I cringe to this day over it. The thing is, I wasn't talking aobut this stuff to be boastful. I was just really excited and wanted to share. I am really careful now not to mention anything about money at all with people.

Anonymous wrote:When I am on Facebook I notice a lot of people post their new homes, pics of renovations etc..

I go out of the way to avoid posting pictures because our home is massive and less than a year old. I also instruct my wife and family members to do the same. We live in nearby areas so people would generally know how much higher the home is worth and I feel like it would be boasting. Part of me is proud of the home and wish I would show it off but feel that it would be not be proper.

Am I over thinking this?

Right, like you have friends.

Anonymous wrote:When I am on Facebook I notice a lot of people post their new homes, pics of renovations etc..

I go out of the way to avoid posting pictures because our home is massive and less than a year old. I also instruct my wife and family members to do the same. We live in nearby areas so people would generally know how much higher the home is worth and I feel like it would be boasting. Part of me is proud of the home and wish I would show it off but feel that it would be not be proper.

Am I over thinking this?

Well done.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's interesting that you assume people in smaller homes would be jealous of your large home. Larger, more expensive homes are not everyone's dream.

+1. Absolutely no desire to live in a McMansion.

You shouldn't be so close minded.

Who are all these people posting pics of their house. My friends only post if they just bight a house or sometimes post before-after pics. Do you not want your wife to post pics of the kids playing on the porch where you can kinda see te house or not post a pic of her fav flowers blooming? You are weird OP.

Anonymous wrote:I think it's interesting that you assume people in smaller homes would be jealous of your large home. Larger, more expensive homes are not everyone's dream.

+1. Absolutely no desire to live in a McMansion.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP THANK YOU FOR BEING SO CONSIDERATE FOR THE LITTLE PEOPLE

Why are you yelling?

BECAUSE THE LITTLE PEOPLE ONLY UNDERSTAND LOUD WORDS

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I want to know how much my friends' houses cost, I can look up the address on Zillow. (quick everyone....go google your best friends! then you can either be jealous or laugh behind their backs!)

Zillow is often wrong. (They're $300k off on our house). Better to go to Fairfax County or Arlington County website, it gives the actual sales prices. I'm sure you can find that in other places, too.

zillow shows sales data and zestimates are pretty accurate if owners claim the home and add / adjust details.

Anonymous wrote:If I want to know how much my friends' houses cost, I can look up the address on Zillow. (quick everyone....go google your best friends! then you can either be jealous or laugh behind their backs!)

Zillow is often wrong. (They're $300k off on our house). Better to go to Fairfax County or Arlington County website, it gives the actual sales prices. I'm sure you can find that in other places, too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Post away, OP. I like seeing pics of my friends' homes. I am very happy with my own nice, modestly-sized home and wouldn't be envious at all of your giant new build. Trust me, if I know where you live I know about what you spent anyway. But I would like to see what you chose as finishings, style, etc. Like HGTV but even better since I know you.

I like seeing pics of people's vacations, too. The more luxe, the better. I am happy for my friends who get to go cool places, and someday when I travel again I'll post pics too.

The "hide everything" people seem to me to be the ones who must be deeply unhappy/jealous to anticipate their success causing so much angst in others. Projecting, I'd bet.

I don't think any PP said to "hide everything." And I think that is a fundamental problem with the prevailing attitude of our society: that NOT showing something or posting pictures of their lives equates to "hiding" or implies some kind of unhappiness.

Some people just aren't into being flashy. And whether you want to admit it or not, if you are posting a ton of pictures of your vacations and your house, et cetera, on a social media platform, then you are being flashy.

That's fine. But don't assume that those who refrain from that are "hiding" something.

I kind of view people who overshare/overpost on facebook in the same way that I view people who do a lot of PDA: They have to have an audience.

+100

If I want to know how much my friends' houses cost, I can look up the address on Zillow. (quick everyone....go google your best friends! then you can either be jealous or laugh behind their backs!)

Anonymous wrote:Also--the size of the house says nothing about somebody's networth. Some of the little folk may have a lot more going on than you think.

Rat Lady told me this is impossible. If you don't live a in a new construction mansion, you're just a poor.