Parents gave 120k with understanding that all of the inheritance will go to my siblings

60k from MIL, derived from assets remaining when late FIL's business was sold 15 years ago. It was in an investment account with DH's name on it (at MIL's insistence, we never had anything to do with it) and she insisted we take it so we could buy a home. FIL died pretty young and suddenly and had a business that required a lot of time away from the family, so MIL pretty much sees those assets as blood money and won't use them for herself. She doesn't need them, but we consider it all hers (which it is). She's now paying for DC's school, again at her insistence.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you're making like $6k a month. You could spend $1,500 on rent each month and still have tons leftover. Where's all your money going?

I wish. It's $4500 take home after my taxes, thrift contribution (12% of salary + 8% match), life+health+dental+vision insurance. Also, I just hit this level of salary one month ago after a recent promotion. I'm also dumping a LOT ($700+ month) on student loans and didn't finish full-time grad school until I was 29. If it wasn't for grad school, I wouldn't have my very good job (got a 40% raise vs. my job before grad school).

I do have money saved up, but no way do I have $50K+ for the down payment (plus closing costs) for a mediocre condo.

Glad to hear you're contributing to your 401k (and what an amazing match rate!!). And totally understand about student loans. So you take home $4,500. You pay $1,500 on rent. Of course you have utilities, phone, that kind of thing. But how much of that $3,000 are you saving?

Right now after the promotion, probably around $1K per month. And yes, I need to up the ante more.

Prior to the promotion, I was paying off my credit cards from grad school (had a $6K balance). Glad to be done with that!

Long story short, I'll have more ability to save over the next two years due to the promotion and no CC balance. However, if I want really want to do the most damage, moving to a cheaper place would be the best bet. However, the commute is going to suck. :-/

How about a group house/roommates? That's what I did at your age.

Anonymous wrote:My parents didn't give me any money for a house. They also didn't pay for my college.

I live in the DC area. I am mid-30s, and I make considerably less than you (I'm more in the range of your friends).

I pay mortgage insurance because I didn't have enough for a down payment. I also bought a house in PG and commute.

There are trade-offs. I never expected my parents to pay for a down payment. They couldn't have even if they wanted to. So I made it work. I found what I could afford and worked with that.

You need to grow up. There will always be people who have more than you do, and it isn't even necessarily that they earned it or deserve. Life isn't fair.

It sounds like you make a good salary. You can afford to buy something, but it probably will require compromise. Welcome to life. I'm kind of shocked you're only now realizing this at 31.

+1

My parents gave me zip, nada, zero. Same w/DH's parents. Everything we have, we have earned. It is not rocket science, but it does require sacrifice and hard work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you're making like $6k a month. You could spend $1,500 on rent each month and still have tons leftover. Where's all your money going?

I wish. It's $4500 take home after my taxes, thrift contribution (12% of salary + 8% match), life+health+dental+vision insurance. Also, I just hit this level of salary one month ago after a recent promotion. I'm also dumping a LOT ($700+ month) on student loans and didn't finish full-time grad school until I was 29. If it wasn't for grad school, I wouldn't have my very good job (got a 40% raise vs. my job before grad school).

I do have money saved up, but no way do I have $50K+ for the down payment (plus closing costs) for a mediocre condo.

Cry me a river. Six figures at 31, no dependents, and you can't save anything? Nothing?

Better get cracking to save up that $50K. You need to start somewhere.

Anonymous wrote:i didnt save shit and got a low money down loan for 900k with 5% down VA

If you "didn't save shit", why did you buy a 900k house?

We got about $50k that my parents had saved for college but not used. I don't think anyone's parents owe them anything, but I also don't think there should be any shame in parents transferring wealth to their kids.

No gift from parents, but our first down payment in 1999 was a combination of year-end bonus and an occasional distribution from my grandfather. 10% on a $200K house in Kensington.

Anonymous wrote:My inlaws give DH $28k a year (the limit before estate taxes). We are currently saving for a house, so we joke that they are buying an extra bedroom a bit at a time. We don't count on the money or ask for it. If they skipped a year or quit it all together, we would not mind since we live within our means. So the extra money goes right in the house account.

They can give you $28k too. That's what my father in law used to do (except he was single so it was $13k for each of us).

I only put 5 percent down in 2003. I saved it all myself. My parents did give me a few thousand (about $3k, I think) for some renovations about a year later. I was 30.

We got the tax free gift limit from H's grandma. We didn't ask. She offered. I think it was $11K at the time. We put down $90K total including closing costs. The rest we had saved up over the years, mostly from my summer associateships in law school which I banked the vast majority of, knowing I was looking to public service/government work after graduation and living as frugally as possible in this area for the first years of our marriage. Our HHI at the time was around $85K. We were very house poor for the first yearish, but were both expecting and received decent raises towards the end of that first year.

$0 from my family

I remember being your age and wondering how some of my colleagues could go house hunting in neighborhoods I couldn't dream of being able to afford. I thought maybe we should just stretch our budget if everyone else is managing to afford a $800K starter home. You have to be really careful not to compare yourself to others. You have to focus on yourself and your budget. You just never know who has extra help behind the scenes. Frankly, I'm surprised your friends were honest enough to tell you they were getting help.

Hell naw. And proud of it!

335k

15:36 here. My shitty cheap apt was actually in Bethesda!! How crazy is that? It was metro accessible too, but only cost me $700 a month.

To the PP who gets $28k a year, holy shit. How much freaking house are you saving for? Am jealous.