Anonymous wrote:I think the trick is to be strict 95% of the time so that once in a while you can bend the rules without it sending the wrong message. My kids know we are strict about school attendance, but once in a blue moon we just lighten up and let things ride. I think our kids appreciate it and don't take advantage because they see it as something unusual and special.

I think bending some rules are okay...extra sweets on occasion, staying up late on occasion, etc...but skipping school is a non-negotiable.

I think the trick is to be strict 95% of the time so that once in a while you can bend the rules without it sending the wrong message. My kids know we are strict about school attendance, but once in a blue moon we just lighten up and let things ride. I think our kids appreciate it and don't take advantage because they see it as something unusual and special.

When I was in elementary school, my mom would surprise us in the morning and say, get dressed, we are going to Disneyland today! (We lived in L.A.) It was always May, we never knew which day, and it is one of the fondest childhood memories I have with my mom and sister. We were not a family who took expensive vacations, and really did have to be bleeding out our eyes in order to be kept home from school for a sick day. Except for that one day! Lines were short, crowds were low; all day was spent with mom and little sister.

You can probably guess where I fall on this issue. If we lived near Disneyland, I would carry on the tradition. I think doing this during elementary school is fine. I understand the stakes are a little higher in high school, so it would really depend on the schedule and the kid. But I have no real objection to it.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is interesting, but I wonder whether anybody is still taking this approach in high school? I know my teenagers occasionally need a day to sleep in -- they go at such a fast pace between school, sports, activities and their bodies aren't programmed to get up at 6am every day.

Still, the problem at this age is that missing a day is more a punishment than a reward due to all the work that must be made up. My kids usually will say it isn't worth it to miss a day.

It can be done in upper school. DS can miss one or two days per year, but never on a test, quiz or project day. And, yes there is a lot of work to make up on the return. So he will only miss if he really absolutely needs to take the day off.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is interesting, but I wonder whether anybody is still taking this approach in high school? I know my teenagers occasionally need a day to sleep in -- they go at such a fast pace between school, sports, activities and their bodies aren't programmed to get up at 6am every day.

Still, the problem at this age is that missing a day is more a punishment than a reward due to all the work that must be made up. My kids usually will say it isn't worth it to miss a day.

In the school system where I work, an unexcused absence in middle school and high school means a "0" in every class for the day. Needless to say, those zeroes can wreck a GPA.

This thread is interesting, but I wonder whether anybody is still taking this approach in high school? I know my teenagers occasionally need a day to sleep in -- they go at such a fast pace between school, sports, activities and their bodies aren't programmed to get up at 6am every day.

Still, the problem at this age is that missing a day is more a punishment than a reward due to all the work that must be made up. My kids usually will say it isn't worth it to miss a day.

Anonymous wrote:no cats, but some kids. I am teaching them to follow the rules. They are happy. No shortage of days available to 'Have fun." Holidays, teacher work days, week-ends, summer.
But I would feel guily for teaching them it is o.k. to break the rules or set the example that rules are for somebody else but not us. People who do this cut in line a lot, among other things.
A brook becomes crooked by following the path of least resistance. Same with people.

The path you're taking is harder and others may try to make themselves feel better with criticism. Your children will be better off for your teaching them what's right and responsible. There are plenty of built-in vacation days for moms and dads to have quality time with their kids.

no cats, but some kids. I am teaching them to follow the rules. They are happy. No shortage of days available to 'Have fun." Holidays, teacher work days, week-ends, summer.
But I would feel guily for teaching them it is o.k. to break the rules or set the example that rules are for somebody else but not us. People who do this cut in line a lot, among other things.
A brook becomes crooked by following the path of least resistance. Same with people.

Anonymous wrote:Almost every jurisdiction in the country requires school children to attend school unless they have a valid excuse to be absent.
Taking the day off "just for fun" is not a valid excuse.
You may say oh what does one day hurt, lighten up Francis.
This is how it starts. Soon they'll be taking a piece of candy at the grocery store since no one is watching.
Then maybe just one toke on a joint. I mean really what's the harm? That red light doesn't mean stop; it's just a suggestion - no traffic cam around, so what's the harm?
then it's cheating on taxes, expense reports, marriage vows
It's a slippery slope I tell ya and cutting school is how it starts.

You are a serious wackadoodle. I feel bad for your children -- if you have any and aren't just living alone with 6 cats.

What a bunch of passive aggressive control freaks. Who gives a flying "f" if your elementary school age child misses a day or two of school a year to have fun or enjoy alone time with a parent. This isn't gonna make or break them in getting into an ivy or being a responsible adult.

Yes, I let my 4 yo DD stay home sometimes. Why not? Preschool is not mandatory.

Yes. I give them the mental health day option every year. One a semester if they want it, they just have to call it that and not have a test, quiz or paper due. It's better than faking sick. We don't go out though. It's a day to regroup at home. Two of my kids have used it. Each one only once. I was fine with it. It was what they needed.

Anonymous wrote:Almost every jurisdiction in the country requires school children to attend school unless they have a valid excuse to be absent.
Taking the day off "just for fun" is not a valid excuse.
You may say oh what does one day hurt, lighten up Francis.
This is how it starts. Soon they'll be taking a piece of candy at the grocery store since no one is watching.
Then maybe just one toke on a joint. I mean really what's the harm? That red light doesn't mean stop; it's just a suggestion - no traffic cam around, so what's the harm?
then it's cheating on taxes, expense reports, marriage vows
It's a slippery slope I tell ya and cutting school is how it starts.

This made me laugh out loud.

One day spent at a museum with mom directly to federal prison for tax evasion. Slippery cliff you mean.

Almost every jurisdiction in the country requires school children to attend school unless they have a valid excuse to be absent.
Taking the day off "just for fun" is not a valid excuse.
You may say oh what does one day hurt, lighten up Francis.
This is how it starts. Soon they'll be taking a piece of candy at the grocery store since no one is watching.
Then maybe just one toke on a joint. I mean really what's the harm? That red light doesn't mean stop; it's just a suggestion - no traffic cam around, so what's the harm?
then it's cheating on taxes, expense reports, marriage vows
It's a slippery slope I tell ya and cutting school is how it starts.

Anonymous wrote:^ you can go ahead and aid and abet truancy if you like. I will teach my kids to follow the rules. That probably makes me a sucker in your book, but that's the way I was raised.

Sucker