No bday gift. Having a party is a gift from us! Her birthday is so close to Christmas that throwing a party is a lot that time of year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do a party for bday and they get presents from friends that way. We have the space to invite a lot of kids (if they want) or do something smaller like a small group and a slumber party. We rarely get them any gifts. Both grandparents are generous and work with us to get them things they will enjoy. Usually it's clothes, winter coat, boots (practical stuff) for the girl and then a few frivolous items from 1 grandma. The other usually does art supplies, maybe some Barbie stuff. DS will generally request a few Wii or DS games or something like a Nerf gun. Probably a total of $150 per kid per bday (plus the party paid for by us).

Christmas I usually go to Value Village and get some books and stocking stuffers. Getting harder with DS as he gets older and choosier, but still a win w/ DD. Spend a total of maybe $20/kid. We get each other (parents) maybe a book or 2. Then we go meet the grandparents for a nice Florida vacation after Christmas. Would rather spend the money that way. Grandparents each spend about $75-$100 again and work with us to get things that the kids really want and will play with.

I am the OP and I am wondering for those who do not get that many presents for kids on bdays and Christmas, do you usually get them toys and other entertainment stuff throughout the year? I am wondering because my kid's bday falls so close to Christmas and I feel like I don't want to "spoil" by getting toys and stuff all year round.

I'm the one giving my DD an origami book. I don't really get her toys throughout the year. If someone gives me a sticker for her or something, I'll pass it along, but we don't just randomly go buy toys for no reason at all.

OK, I'll bite, so if you don't get her random presents or birthday presents, when do you get her stuff? Or do you have relatives who get her stuff? Or does she truly not get anything other than a craft book and bare essentials? If so, what does she do when she is at home?

She gets to bake more than once a year! We go to the library twice a week so she reads a lot, draws, writes her own stories and plays, these days she's practicing juggling with her stuffed animals, she can go next door to play basketball in their driveway (they leave their ball in a container thing outside). She plays music and makes up dances, has friends over, makes videos on th ecomputer, reads her magazine (my friend got her a subscription to National Geographic). We play cards or one of our board games, etc. There's tons to do - she rarely gets bored.

One or two and a big-ass party. I don't limit spending so much as I think about what she wants and what will last. For her 5th, she got a very fancy princess dress ($70) because she wears her cheapo ones all the time and they fall about like *that* -- preferred to buy one and have it last as a hand me down for girl #2.

And she received magna tiles.

Oh, and a birthday party for her friends. Not big, but it took a great deal of effort to put together. I had fun doint it, mind you...

Yeah, me too, PP. We don't do a lot of random toys but DS gets a bit more than that. DS got Magnatiles, a toy truck, a nightlight that lights up when he can get up (more for me, ha!) and a set of Dr. Suess for his birthday, so around $150. He'll get about the same for Christmas. Still, his friends come over and seem shocked there isn't a ton of plastic around, and one recently asked "Why doesn't DS have any toys?" Sigh.

DS is young so we don't do all the toys at one time. When he starts to get engaged with one, we let him play with it. Sometimes it takes 2 weeks to get all the birthday or Christmas presents opened but it spreads out the fun too and he gets to enjoy them as he goes instead of overwhelming him in one fell swoop. I'm sure his tendency towant to spread it out will fade with age.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do a party for bday and they get presents from friends that way. We have the space to invite a lot of kids (if they want) or do something smaller like a small group and a slumber party. We rarely get them any gifts. Both grandparents are generous and work with us to get them things they will enjoy. Usually it's clothes, winter coat, boots (practical stuff) for the girl and then a few frivolous items from 1 grandma. The other usually does art supplies, maybe some Barbie stuff. DS will generally request a few Wii or DS games or something like a Nerf gun. Probably a total of $150 per kid per bday (plus the party paid for by us).

Christmas I usually go to Value Village and get some books and stocking stuffers. Getting harder with DS as he gets older and choosier, but still a win w/ DD. Spend a total of maybe $20/kid. We get each other (parents) maybe a book or 2. Then we go meet the grandparents for a nice Florida vacation after Christmas. Would rather spend the money that way. Grandparents each spend about $75-$100 again and work with us to get things that the kids really want and will play with.

I am the OP and I am wondering for those who do not get that many presents for kids on bdays and Christmas, do you usually get them toys and other entertainment stuff throughout the year? I am wondering because my kid's bday falls so close to Christmas and I feel like I don't want to "spoil" by getting toys and stuff all year round.

I'm the one giving my DD an origami book. I don't really get her toys throughout the year. If someone gives me a sticker for her or something, I'll pass it along, but we don't just randomly go buy toys for no reason at all.

OK, I'll bite, so if you don't get her random presents or birthday presents, when do you get her stuff? Or do you have relatives who get her stuff? Or does she truly not get anything other than a craft book and bare essentials? If so, what does she do when she is at home?

NP here.

Wow? What does she do? How about use her imagination? Read? Watch TV? Go on the internet? Draw? Bake? Write stories?

It's so weird how everyone here is so attached to "stuff".

Well you need "stuff" to read, draw, and write stories. We know she bakes once a year because her mom gives her a certificate to do that. So, ok, maybe she's spending all her time on the tv or Internet, I'd probably prefer that my kid play with "stuff" instead of this, but, whatever, different strokes I guess.

I wasn't trying to be rude, I'm really just wondering what the girl does when she is home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do a party for bday and they get presents from friends that way. We have the space to invite a lot of kids (if they want) or do something smaller like a small group and a slumber party. We rarely get them any gifts. Both grandparents are generous and work with us to get them things they will enjoy. Usually it's clothes, winter coat, boots (practical stuff) for the girl and then a few frivolous items from 1 grandma. The other usually does art supplies, maybe some Barbie stuff. DS will generally request a few Wii or DS games or something like a Nerf gun. Probably a total of $150 per kid per bday (plus the party paid for by us).

Christmas I usually go to Value Village and get some books and stocking stuffers. Getting harder with DS as he gets older and choosier, but still a win w/ DD. Spend a total of maybe $20/kid. We get each other (parents) maybe a book or 2. Then we go meet the grandparents for a nice Florida vacation after Christmas. Would rather spend the money that way. Grandparents each spend about $75-$100 again and work with us to get things that the kids really want and will play with.

I am the OP and I am wondering for those who do not get that many presents for kids on bdays and Christmas, do you usually get them toys and other entertainment stuff throughout the year? I am wondering because my kid's bday falls so close to Christmas and I feel like I don't want to "spoil" by getting toys and stuff all year round.

I'm the one giving my DD an origami book. I don't really get her toys throughout the year. If someone gives me a sticker for her or something, I'll pass it along, but we don't just randomly go buy toys for no reason at all.

OK, I'll bite, so if you don't get her random presents or birthday presents, when do you get her stuff? Or do you have relatives who get her stuff? Or does she truly not get anything other than a craft book and bare essentials? If so, what does she do when she is at home?

NP here.

Wow? What does she do? How about use her imagination? Read? Watch TV? Go on the internet? Draw? Bake? Write stories?

It's so weird how everyone here is so attached to "stuff".

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do a party for bday and they get presents from friends that way. We have the space to invite a lot of kids (if they want) or do something smaller like a small group and a slumber party. We rarely get them any gifts. Both grandparents are generous and work with us to get them things they will enjoy. Usually it's clothes, winter coat, boots (practical stuff) for the girl and then a few frivolous items from 1 grandma. The other usually does art supplies, maybe some Barbie stuff. DS will generally request a few Wii or DS games or something like a Nerf gun. Probably a total of $150 per kid per bday (plus the party paid for by us).

Christmas I usually go to Value Village and get some books and stocking stuffers. Getting harder with DS as he gets older and choosier, but still a win w/ DD. Spend a total of maybe $20/kid. We get each other (parents) maybe a book or 2. Then we go meet the grandparents for a nice Florida vacation after Christmas. Would rather spend the money that way. Grandparents each spend about $75-$100 again and work with us to get things that the kids really want and will play with.

I am the OP and I am wondering for those who do not get that many presents for kids on bdays and Christmas, do you usually get them toys and other entertainment stuff throughout the year? I am wondering because my kid's bday falls so close to Christmas and I feel like I don't want to "spoil" by getting toys and stuff all year round.

I'm the one giving my DD an origami book. I don't really get her toys throughout the year. If someone gives me a sticker for her or something, I'll pass it along, but we don't just randomly go buy toys for no reason at all.

OK, I'll bite, so if you don't get her random presents or birthday presents, when do you get her stuff? Or do you have relatives who get her stuff? Or does she truly not get anything other than a craft book and bare essentials? If so, what does she do when she is at home?

DD is 3. For both her last birthday and Christmas, I actually didn't give her the presents we bought her until a month or two later. For Xmas, my in-laws gave her so many gifts I felt like it was just overwhelming and she had a party for her birthday and so got a lot of new presents. I kept our gifts hidden and gave them to her gradually over the next several months. At this age, she doesn't really get who the presents are "from" so much as she knows that she got a lot of new stuff all at the same time. Anyone have any tips on how to get the grandparents to chill out on the gift-giving? Seriously, ours are ridiculous.

My nieces, now 18, 19 and 21 all were lavishly spoiled by family and friends. When they were young, there were closets of unopened toys, gifts, etc because they received so many things. My siblings both lamented that they spent so much money on gifts and yet the kids often didn't notice or enjoy some gifts because they were overwhelmed. So, my mother and I started the "grandma fund" for each of the girls. Each year, we gave them something small they would enjoy and then would put money into the grandma fund, for both birthdays and Christmas. And they still had overwhelming amounts of gifts from other relatives and friends. When my oldest niece was going to college and wanted a new car, she took out $8000 from the grandma fund, shopped around, got a great deal on a very lightly used car that fit her needs perfectly and actually returned $3000 to the grandma fund. And there's still more money there for whenever she wants it. The second niece, in HS, took out money to buy herself a really nice camera since she was getting much more into photography than when she got her cute, nice point-and-shoot from her dad a few years before.

So, now that I have two one year olds, we actually got them nothing for Christmas or their recent first birthday. They still received a ton of gifts from aunts and uncles, and friends of the family. Instead, I put $200 for each of them in their bank account for both Christmas and $100 each for birthday and we threw them the party (really for us, but we did include several other one year olds for a playdate). My mother has continued to add to the "grandma fund" for each holiday. I have two one year olds who already have $1500 bank accounts and growing.

One birthday gift, somewhere in the $100 range.

One large Christmas gift, also $100 range, plus some smaller stocking and Hanukkah gifts (under $15 range, maybe 5-10 total, but we also have some family traditions around the small gifts so he's not getting them all at once and they are part of our larger family celebrations). He also gets gifts from relatives, friends, and grandparents, so he's getting a total of 4-5 larger gifts ($50 range) and 4-5 smaller gifts ($25 range) from people other than us. No shortage of toys or presents to open!

We buy a few toys over the course of the year if specific things are needed (birthday and Christmas are within two months of each other, so sometimes there will be something that can't wait that long), and we buy books throughout the year. We also get hand-me-down toys throughout the year so those are "new" from my child's perspective--I try to bring a few out at a time.

No outside of birthday and Christmas we don't guy gifts / toys. They still get the occasional toy from visits with extended family though at other times of the year.

am the OP and I am wondering for those who do not get that many presents for kids on bdays and Christmas, do you usually get them toys and other entertainment stuff throughout the year?

Yes, though not constantly. DS is under 5 so I still play with him quite a bit, and I like some variety in toys and activities as well!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do a party for bday and they get presents from friends that way. We have the space to invite a lot of kids (if they want) or do something smaller like a small group and a slumber party. We rarely get them any gifts. Both grandparents are generous and work with us to get them things they will enjoy. Usually it's clothes, winter coat, boots (practical stuff) for the girl and then a few frivolous items from 1 grandma. The other usually does art supplies, maybe some Barbie stuff. DS will generally request a few Wii or DS games or something like a Nerf gun. Probably a total of $150 per kid per bday (plus the party paid for by us).

Christmas I usually go to Value Village and get some books and stocking stuffers. Getting harder with DS as he gets older and choosier, but still a win w/ DD. Spend a total of maybe $20/kid. We get each other (parents) maybe a book or 2. Then we go meet the grandparents for a nice Florida vacation after Christmas. Would rather spend the money that way. Grandparents each spend about $75-$100 again and work with us to get things that the kids really want and will play with.

I am the OP and I am wondering for those who do not get that many presents for kids on bdays and Christmas, do you usually get them toys and other entertainment stuff throughout the year? I am wondering because my kid's bday falls so close to Christmas and I feel like I don't want to "spoil" by getting toys and stuff all year round.

I'm the one giving my DD an origami book. I don't really get her toys throughout the year. If someone gives me a sticker for her or something, I'll pass it along, but we don't just randomly go buy toys for no reason at all.

Anonymous wrote:We do a party for bday and they get presents from friends that way. We have the space to invite a lot of kids (if they want) or do something smaller like a small group and a slumber party. We rarely get them any gifts. Both grandparents are generous and work with us to get them things they will enjoy. Usually it's clothes, winter coat, boots (practical stuff) for the girl and then a few frivolous items from 1 grandma. The other usually does art supplies, maybe some Barbie stuff. DS will generally request a few Wii or DS games or something like a Nerf gun. Probably a total of $150 per kid per bday (plus the party paid for by us).

Christmas I usually go to Value Village and get some books and stocking stuffers. Getting harder with DS as he gets older and choosier, but still a win w/ DD. Spend a total of maybe $20/kid. We get each other (parents) maybe a book or 2. Then we go meet the grandparents for a nice Florida vacation after Christmas. Would rather spend the money that way. Grandparents each spend about $75-$100 again and work with us to get things that the kids really want and will play with.

I am the OP and I am wondering for those who do not get that many presents for kids on bdays and Christmas, do you usually get them toys and other entertainment stuff throughout the year? I am wondering because my kid's bday falls so close to Christmas and I feel like I don't want to "spoil" by getting toys and stuff all year round.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I cannot imagine not giving any gifts to my kids on their special day. They are gifts in my life and i love to celebrate their presence here. It is not about material value at all, it is about showing you care and their day is special as they are.

Wow, these posts are so eye-opening. Not sure so much of the individuals or of our society. I think it is about the material value (since so much else can show these things, $$ value must be what is meaningful to you) or a total lack of imagination on your part. Or maybe I am misreading this post and by gifts you might mean something neat you made for the child of little cost etc.

Are you saying that you find it odd or out of the ordinary for a child to get a birthday gift for his birthday?