There will be an autopsy, a police investigation, an investigation by child protective services. The results of all of these will not be available for 2 to 4 weeks at a miniumum.

so, trying to reevaluate risks for centers you may or may not be considering, you have to wait for all of that to clear.

I am a SIDS parent and have met many others. No meaningful info will be available for minimum of a month. And chances are very very high that this infant death was random lousy luck, and all caregivers were following all best practices. That's the case in the majority of SIDS deaths these days. It was in my house.

As a MOTH too I don't find it a problem to repost the note here. There was zero identifying information sobstope getting your panties twisted.

It is a horrible situation and having gone through a SIDS death at a facility I can assure you that the family and center are devastated-- not running to DCUM to check in in things. They are most likely consumed by the truly horrific police investigation which they will all be subjected to. That is what is horrific. Not this.

Anonymous wrote:

New poster here: What are you talking about? I'm not trying to be snotty but I think you are overreacting. People are just curious and scared. I doubt anyone is deriving some kind of morbid glee from this event. It's an awful tragedy and I think many are concerned about the how and why it occurred. A PP poster has now told us. And now many of us feel a need to express our deep sympathies.

There's a word for that. It's called "rubbernecking".

Anonymous wrote:As a member of MOTH, I'm annoyed to see one of our posts copied on DCUM. I hope they find and ban you.

Because that would be so devastating?

As a member of MOTH, I'm annoyed to see one of our posts copied on DCUM. I hope they find and ban you.

Anonymous wrote:Moms on the Hill, or MOTH, is an almost always wonderful, civil, and supportive listserve for parents on Capitol Hill to share information. It is not anonymous, like DCUM.

There were no details provided there other than the fact that a tragic infant death had occurred, and two MOTH moms with kids at the center provided what little information they had, while expressing their support for the center and the caregivers. No one on MOTH mentioned that a child had been found unresponsive in his/her crib, which is why the post above from 13:53 was, I believe, helpful.

Just FYI, here was the original post from last night:

MOTH,

Tragically, a baby in one of the infant rooms at my daughter's daycare facility died during the day today. No details have been provided to the parent community yet (and I don't know if they will be - I assume there are many legal issues to contend with re: disclosure of information in this type of situation), but I have been struggling all day with some pretty extreme feelings. I can't begin to imagine the horrible and sudden loss suffered by these parents (even starting to think about it sends me into a panic), and I'm guessing there are other parents with children at this center who are similarly distraught. I'm also absolutely heartbroken for the women who work at this facility, who've now had the unthinkable happen and must somehow work through it.

Does anyone have a recommendation for a website, book, support group or other resource that might be helpful in working through these emotions? I feel silly for having such strong feelings about a tragedy that I am essentially tangential to, but I really can't believe how hard this is hitting me - I'd love to have some resources to share with other parents who might be feeling the same way. And if anyone has recommendations for what to do / say / recommend to the women who work at our daycare center, please share those as well.

Many thanks,

[then she signed her name]

What followed from the MOTH community was an outpouring of shared grief, advice, and support. Novel concept, eh?

Apparently the fact that reposting limited-access emails to public forums is against the user agreement of almost every listserve is a novel concept to you, though.

Please stop engaging with 17:00.

Anonymous wrote:No, its about safety, and knowing what happened so that we can all evaluate or revaluate the possible risks involved in the form of childcare we will use/are using. Its about learning as much as we can about an unfortunate incident that occurred when a child was under the care of professionals, in order to understand and appreciate the potential risks involved.

Right, that's what I said. You just don't like the way I said it. If someone emails or sends you something on a private forum or list, then why not respond back to them instead of dragging somewhere else?

This thread is tasteless no matter how you try to sweeten it up. Come back with some information that's been verified and then have a discussion on safety precautions IF it is at all relevant. Because right now all you are doing is being tacky and then justifying it because it's about you, your concerns, and you have a right to know for your own child. "Hey pssssttt did you hear about the baby...oh yea, the parents, sorry but I need to know what happened..." Grow up, gossip over the phone. Or here's a clue dimwit OP- respond to the person who told you in the first place!

So far 09/25/2012 16:50 seems to be the only one with some decency. So let's end with that and move on.

I can't imagine how difficult and horrible this whole situation must be for the poor family of the child. If the child died of SIDS, it was probably difficult, horrible, and shocking for his or her caretakers at the daycare as well. I feel so sorry for all involved.

Anonymous wrote:is this connected to yesterday's post: "incident at bright horizons ny ave today"

I am curious to know this as well. I assumed so.

I can't imagine how difficult and horrible this whole situation must be for the poor family of the child. If the child died of SIDS, it was probably difficult, horrible, and shocking for his or her caretakers at the daycare as well. I feel so sorry for all involved.

Anonymous wrote:Drawing attention to themselves? I don't see anyone doing that nor do I see anyone saying 'so glad it wasn't me'. Everyone has been pretty respectful thus far. It seems like you're overly worked up over this thread for some reason.

And how does one draw attention to oneself with an anonymous posting?

Can we all just ignore the deranged PP?

is this connected to yesterday's post: "incident at bright horizons ny ave today"

No, its about safety, and knowing what happened so that we can all evaluate or revaluate the possible risks involved in the form of childcare we will use/are using. Its about learning as much as we can about an unfortunate incident that occurred when a child was under the care of professionals, in order to understand and appreciate the potential risks involved. There is no debate that this is tragic and unthinkable, and the family deserves the upmost compassion and respect. The only good that can ever come out of such sad things is an opportunity to learn and change, if there is in fact anything that could have been prevented or changed. That is all any parent is thinking about here; its not about morbid curiosity, but rather internal looking need to protect. Fear/panic is a natural reaction to a story like this for any parent that uses daycare, and it can only be quelled with information.

I think we can all agree that the poster that provided the vaccination/CIO rant is making it all about his or her agenda.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


OK lady...since we have no details, how the hell do you know the family wants to be private. Maybe, they want to be public to prevent something like that from happening to anyone else. Lots of grieving families do that. I can't believe I'm actually engaging you again, but you really need to calm down. Not everyone is as evil as you think we are and we certainly have a right to know.

Right, this is about you.

You've come unglued.

Anonymous wrote:


OK lady...since we have no details, how the hell do you know the family wants to be private. Maybe, they want to be public to prevent something like that from happening to anyone else. Lots of grieving families do that. I can't believe I'm actually engaging you again, but you really need to calm down. Not everyone is as evil as you think we are and we certainly have a right to know.

Right, this is about you.