Anonymous wrote:I love this... Half the things that people are confessing I never even thought of as shameful. DD is only 4 mos. so most aren't relevant yet, but it never occurred to me that: (1) a glass of wine is dangerous, (2) Trader Joes is bad for you, (3) a six-yr old watching a movie is even noteworthy, (4) a couple pots in the sink are a problem, (5) reading DCUM = neglect. And apparently these things are so shameful that there are other Mom's who will scold you for such actions - and then claim you are bragging about them b/c you admit them on an anonymous forum. Clearly I am new at this but WTF?

I'm right there with you, but my kid is five months, so I've had a whole additional month to learn. I have learned from DCUM that the fact that my kid was born five weeks early and had to go to the NICU, and that I have supplemented with formula, means that he is headed for reform school/we will never bond/and I am shittastic. Honestly, I feel OK with having already failed, as I can't be held to unreasonably high expectations, and I have no place to go but up.

I love this... Half the things that people are confessing I never even thought of as shameful. DD is only 4 mos. so most aren't relevant yet, but it never occurred to me that: (1) a glass of wine is dangerous, (2) Trader Joes is bad for you, (3) a six-yr old watching a movie is even noteworthy, (4) a couple pots in the sink are a problem, (5) reading DCUM = neglect. And apparently these things are so shameful that there are other Mom's who will scold you for such actions - and then claim you are bragging about them b/c you admit them on an anonymous forum. Clearly I am new at this but WTF?

I think teaching your kids that you really can't take yourself too seriously, or demand that everyone else take you too seriously, is one of our highest and best uses as a parent. This is really the ol' "its the journey and the destination" adventure. We want to produce well-adjusted, humorous, fun adults that contribute to society and have empathy (well, that's my goal), we have to do that in the real world (in this case, DC-area, which means we don't have copious amounts of spare money or time), and we want to have fun on the journey (well, I do -- in fact, I insist on it as the journey is going to be most of the mobile years of my remaining life span!). Making time for fun and for us to be happy people, as well as happy parents, is hugely important, because if we aren't happy and enjoying ourselves, we simply can't teach our kids how to do those things. So, cutting corners in certain aspects is absolutely necessary, for me, anyway. Honestly, I think those that don't get caught up in minutiea. And I think way too often we let our fear of each others' judgment rain on our own little happy parades. Well, I for one, refuse. I not being supermom means that my kid has a fun mom, I choose that.

I had an elective C-section!!!!! this one takes the cake!!!

Anonymous wrote:I let my kid watch videos at age 7 months and still let him, he has his own iPad, I feed my 18 month old squeeze pouches instead of making my own baby food. I also feed him chicken nuggets and a lot of sugar (tons of fruit, honey nut cheerios) I don't spend enough time reading to him. My house is a disaster and I drive a beat up, old jacked up car and live in a slightly ghetto area in a bad public school pyramid.

Wait are we not supposed to feed fruit now? And here I was thinking I was a super mom.

Anonymous wrote:I let my kid watch videos at age 7 months and still let him, he has his own iPad, I feed my 18 month old squeeze pouches instead of making my own baby food. I also feed him chicken nuggets and a lot of sugar (tons of fruit, honey nut cheerios) I don't spend enough time reading to him. My house is a disaster and I drive a beat up, old jacked up car and live in a slightly ghetto area in a bad public school pyramid.

You are a renegade. Really.

I let my kid watch videos at age 7 months and still let him, he has his own iPad, I feed my 18 month old squeeze pouches instead of making my own baby food. I also feed him chicken nuggets and a lot of sugar (tons of fruit, honey nut cheerios) I don't spend enough time reading to him. My house is a disaster and I drive a beat up, old jacked up car and live in a slightly ghetto area in a bad public school pyramid.

There needs to be a group for just us moms who don't do everything perfectly and are 100% ok with it. I can't tell you how many play groups I have stopped going to because all the moms do is try and 1 up each other on what perfect mothers they are. I thought it would be different because these are weekend playgroups (aka mostly all moms who work outside the home) but its not, they were just as judgy. Ugh. This thread makes me think of the time I was at CVS and watched a lady make her children use hand sanitizer each time they took an M&M out of the bag that they had with them (organic specialty type M&M things). Give me a break. Parents are no fun when all they talk about is parenting.

I find that the people who worry the most about being judged are also the most judgmental. They shudder at the prospect that they'll be criticized the way they secretly criticize others and assessed by the same measures they assign to others. I like the spirit of the thread, I really do. But most of the posts remind me that the supposedly carefree, "I'm not a supermom and proud of it" crowd, is the most snarky, insecure, and judgmental group around, much worse than the supermoms (who the non-supermoms judge too).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Right, exactly like I said in my first sentence - no, I don't get it. So I don't get why people enjoy bragging about what awful parents they are = I don't have enough fun. Nice one PP.

Who is bragging? I see people stating facts "my kid is watching a movie" "I didn't put away the laundry", etc. I'm sitting on DCUM and there's 2 dirty pots sitting in the sink. I'm not bragging about it, but the pots are there. Apparently you are on DCUM too, shouldn't you be out striving for better?

So no one else was bothered by OP's post?

Nope - not bothered at all.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Right, exactly like I said in my first sentence - no, I don't get it. So I don't get why people enjoy bragging about what awful parents they are = I don't have enough fun. Nice one PP.

Who is bragging? I see people stating facts "my kid is watching a movie" "I didn't put away the laundry", etc. I'm sitting on DCUM and there's 2 dirty pots sitting in the sink. I'm not bragging about it, but the pots are there. Apparently you are on DCUM too, shouldn't you be out striving for better?

So no one else was bothered by OP's post?

If one spends too much time on DCUM (as I do) it's really easy to feel like a shittastic mom. In reality, I'm a pretty good mom, despite the fact that even though I try making my own baby food, I usually end up buying it, I watch tv when my 5mo is in the room, I'm not a good cook, and I use hand sanitizer. I also had an induced labor and an epidural! Just because we don't do all the supermom things, doesn't mean we are bragging, or awful parents. Just give is our thread, and let us have a place to not be criticized for our choices and imperfections.

Anonymous wrote:OP didn't say her kid was watching a movie. She said her 1yo was watching Narnia, which I assumed was one of the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe movies, which are long and kind of scary. So I'm picturing her sitting there, drinking glasses of wine, her 3yo totally missing and her young kids watching hours of totally inappropriate TV, and I'm kind of shocked. The other one that got me was the "my kid eats Trader Joe's five nights a week.". Totally different than I left two pots in the sink or I'm on DCUM at 10 at night or I haven't taken the laundry out of the dryer yet.

TJ's mom here. I think it's funny that you're scandalized by my kid eating turkey meatballs, polenta with spinach and carrots, or butternut squash risotto from Trader Joe's for dinner. Sure, it's probably too much sodium, but since he never eats fast food or processed snack food, I figure it all balances out. I have a demanding job, and I don't have the time or inclination to spend hours chopping vegetables and cooking when I could spend that time with my child.

And frankly, anybody's whose big confession is that they left two pots in the sink sounds kind of sad to me.

Anonymous wrote:OP didn't say her kid was watching a movie. She said her 1yo was watching Narnia, which I assumed was one of the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe movies, which are long and kind of scary. So I'm picturing her sitting there, drinking glasses of wine, her 3yo totally missing and her young kids watching hours of totally inappropriate TV, and I'm kind of shocked. The other one that got me was the "my kid eats Trader Joe's five nights a week.". Totally different than I left two pots in the sink or I'm on DCUM at 10 at night or I haven't taken the laundry out of the dryer yet.

Okay, just to make it clear - it's not like her 3yo is roaming out in the streets. He's somewhere in the house. He's not 'missing'. Do you never let your kids out of your sight?

Anonymous wrote:1) Yesterday while letting my DD (4) watch several episodes of Max & Ruby/Fresh Beat Band, I fell asleep. I woke up with a blanket over me. DD says "mommy I put a blanket on you because you fell asleep, are you done with your nap now? Can you make me some lunch?"2) After letting DD run around the park all
Saturday afternoon I didnt give her a bath before we went out to dinner. I did change her clothes though.

I actually think that is amazingly sweet.

Anonymous wrote:Uh....judgemental mom, no one is bragging. I read it as people just stating a fact. My fact: I've been too lazy to put away the laundry i did friday after work. For the last couple of days, I've been taking my outfits out of the dryer. And I'm sure once kids come along, I'll be lazy about some things. I'm hardly bragging and would be mortified if someone (other than dh) saw me take my clothes out of the dryer and put them on right there, but i can be honest about it.

Relax a little lady.

And you don't even have kids yet?