Anonymous
Post 06/21/2026 07:30     Subject: Wedding gift
Anonymous wrote:Op here. I’m not sure why they came down the afternoon before as the wedding didn't start until 3 the next day. They could have stayed at the hotel block downtown and walked everywhere. But, whatever.


Check-in at most hotels is not until 3:00, and early check-in is not always guaranteed. The wedding was at 3:00, so they would have needed to be assured they could check in early to get ready for the wedding. Also, some couple require 2 rooms (my DH snores), so a hotel might have cost them more than the Airbnb.
Anonymous
Post 06/21/2026 02:01     Subject: Wedding gift
Even if they did exactly as you suggested and stayed at your designated hotel and walked everywhere, they still might not have given a wedding gift.

If one of them recently received an inheritance, it’s not considered jointly owned money and the recipient may be keeping it separate from their spouse. So don’t count on that as a source of wedding gift and travel funds.
Anonymous
Post 06/20/2026 18:13     Subject: Wedding gift
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You know these people well enough to invite them to your sons wedding, they attended and spend hundreds of dollars on it, but that’s not good enough for you because they didn’t give a gift on top of that. You also didn’t address how long your son and his now wife had been cohabitating before the wedding. If this is going to be a dealbreaker for you, I’d say you’re shallow.


It’s not a dealbreaker ffs.
Cohabiting? 1.5 years. Why is that important? They asked for ppl to contribute to a honeymoon fund, if ppl wanted to give a gift.


Well here is the problem. They asked for money. Most polite 65+ year olds with a decent upbringing would find this tacky AF. They are politely telling your son that you don't ask for money. If they can't afford a honeymoon, spend less on the wedding.



I'm the OP. I wondered about this. However, they have two households they combined. They don't need any more stuff. But, people constantly asked "what do they want as a gift."
Anonymous
Post 06/20/2026 18:11     Subject: Wedding gift
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:ICYMI: you don’t invite people to a far-flung wedding and expect a gift.

Heck, plenty of couples proactively convey “no gifts” these days.

Anyway, since you’ve commented multiple times that you would never ask about a gift, then why do you suddenly care? Weird.


Far flung? It was two hours away.
And.. these ppl are 65ish.


2 hours is a schlep for most people…especially older people…particularly when a wedding, reception, and alcohol are involved.

Most people aren’t up for driving home 2+ hours after a wedding…but you know that since you got room blocks at two hotels.



Well, I didn't but my son and wife did.
Anonymous
Post 06/20/2026 18:10     Subject: Wedding gift
Anonymous wrote:How wealthy are the couple?


moderately. Just received an inheritance of I don't know what size but she got a new car.
Anonymous
Post 06/20/2026 16:18     Subject: Wedding gift
How wealthy are the couple?