Anonymous wrote:I've always thought that I'd pay for a top tier school or state school, nothing in between. My first got into and attends a top tier school but my second will almost certainly not get into one, yet is interested in a number of second tier schools that have the same hefty price tag. Would you force your kid to attend a state school if they didn't get into a top tier school? With great sacrifice, we can afford to pay the second or third tier price tag but I can't help but think my kid would be better off at a state school and with ~200k (the likely cost difference) in a long-term investment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've always thought that I'd pay for a top tier school or state school, nothing in between. My first got into and attends a top tier school but my second will almost certainly not get into one, yet is interested in a number of second tier schools that have the same hefty price tag. Would you force your kid to attend a state school if they didn't get into a top tier school? With great sacrifice, we can afford to pay the second or third tier price tag but I can't help but think my kid would be better off at a state school and with ~200k (the likely cost difference) in a long-term investment.

State school how is this even a question

Parents who send their kid OOS to places like Alabama or SC are idiots financially I say this as a person who could afford to send my kid anywhere

Teach your kids financial literacy

Anonymous wrote:I've always thought that I'd pay for a top tier school or state school, nothing in between. My first got into and attends a top tier school but my second will almost certainly not get into one, yet is interested in a number of second tier schools that have the same hefty price tag. Would you force your kid to attend a state school if they didn't get into a top tier school? With great sacrifice, we can afford to pay the second or third tier price tag but I can't help but think my kid would be better off at a state school and with ~200k (the likely cost difference) in a long-term investment.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Each kid is different. My first went to a smallish Jesuit school that’s a good fit for her. Substantial merit aid (grants) brought it down to the state flagship where she was not accepted. She’s doing very well there and is happy.
Second kid two year behind is a competitive out of state flagship which also offered her substantial grants. She likes swimming with the sharks and is premed. Excellent fit for her too.
I can afford both their schools without loans. I have a small house with a “vintage” kitchen and linoleum floors.
This is the best way I spend my money.
I have a third in high school. I just put another nail in those old kitchen cabinets.

beautiful

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would never in a million years pay anywhere near full price for a second or third tier private school, especially being Virginia residents, and would only pay for first tier if we were talking top ten or better. No Vanderbilts, Northwesterns, Notre Dames, Wash Us or Emorys over UVA—no way no how—no bullshit liberal arts college over William & Mary, no middling private over JMU, etc.

If I were OP I’d offer exactly what she’s proposing and hope the kid accepts. And I wouldn’t think twice about the first kid. As she said, he wouldn’t have gone for it anyway.

OK, cheapskate. You sound like someone who is not very successful.

Anonymous wrote:Each kid is different. My first went to a smallish Jesuit school that’s a good fit for her. Substantial merit aid (grants) brought it down to the state flagship where she was not accepted. She’s doing very well there and is happy.
Second kid two year behind is a competitive out of state flagship which also offered her substantial grants. She likes swimming with the sharks and is premed. Excellent fit for her too.
I can afford both their schools without loans. I have a small house with a “vintage” kitchen and linoleum floors.
This is the best way I spend my money.
I have a third in high school. I just put another nail in those old kitchen cabinets.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of second and third tier schools don’t really cost that much. They give merit to nearly everyone they admit. Just don’t tie your hands by applying ED (unless it’s to one of the ones that guarantees merit to ED applicants).

This. My oldest goes to a "second tier" school and we pay far less than I expect we will for my youngest, who is competitive for "top tier" schools.

But I also don't understand why your second child's education would be worth less to you, just because he won't be competitive for highly selective schools. Especially if he wants a different environment than state schools offer and you can afford it.

Anonymous wrote:When you get old and grumpy, the first child won’t be the one who is around. They have their md or jd (paid for by you), and will have a busy schedule. The second one, state college kid, will take care of you. Life is not fair to the second.