Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My oh my this thread went off the rails.

A partner who is motivated primarily by love and concern doesn’t
(a) wait weeks to bring up an issue,
(b) do so only during a fight, and/or
(c) leave their loved one feeling small, insecure, and unsupported.

So, divorce?

OP. That depends entirely on whether the partner values the relationship and themselves enough to work on it avidly, and with professional help if needed.

Yes? Then the answer to you is "no."
No? Then might well be yes.

[should be "DP"]

Didn’t read all of the responses.

I’m also an “extroverted introvert” who likes a glass of wine married to a true introvert who doesn’t drink. It’s gotten worse and worse as he got older and at this point in time he can hardly stand to socialize for more than 40 minutes in a row. In fact, he will start trying to leave after 30 minutes - even in the middle of dinner!

Once during a fight he told me “after one drink you start acting like an idiot babbling about unimportant drivel. You suck all if the air out of room.”

So, that was cool! I told him he was dull and made people uncomfortable by looking bored and giving only monosyllabic answers in social situations and blatantly trying to escape.

But, we both have friends and both get invited to social events. It takes all kinds, I guess. Also, his stepdad was an alcoholic, so I think drinking just makes him nervous (even though I probably have a total of 2 glasses of wine/month).

Anyhow, we just don’t do much together socially anymore since I annoy him at parties, but we get along great as long as we aren’t at a party - which is the vast majority of the time, so that works out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two glasses of wine is kind of a lot. You need someone to tell you what you're like when drunk. Do you always need to drink to be excited to be with your friends when you're out? Skip the wine next time.

No. I don't drink alcohol myself, but I do know that 2 drinks on a night out with a meal is pretty standard, even for women. The medical definition of binge drinking starts at 4 drinks for women, and this is well below it.

I'm picking up a shaming tone in your post, and that says so very much more about you and your problems then about OP. It's kind of gross.

I don't care if you think it's shaming. 2 glasses is a lot for a lot of women and if OP is acting silly then her husband is doing her a favor pointing it out. We've all seen sloppy drunk friends. OP says she doesn't go out much so if she's suddenly drinking it can be a lot at once.

OP’s husband found DCUM.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My oh my this thread went off the rails.

A partner who is motivated primarily by love and concern doesn’t
(a) wait weeks to bring up an issue,
(b) do so only during a fight, and/or
(c) leave their loved one feeling small, insecure, and unsupported.

So, divorce?

OP. That depends entirely on whether the partner values the relationship and themselves enough to work on it avidly, and with professional help if needed.

Yes? Then the answer to you is "no."
No? Then might well be yes.

Anonymous wrote:My oh my this thread went off the rails.

A partner who is motivated primarily by love and concern doesn’t
(a) wait weeks to bring up an issue,
(b) do so only during a fight, and/or
(c) leave their loved one feeling small, insecure, and unsupported.

So, divorce?

My oh my this thread went off the rails.

A partner who is motivated primarily by love and concern doesn’t
(a) wait weeks to bring up an issue,
(b) do so only during a fight, and/or
(c) leave their loved one feeling small, insecure, and unsupported.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two glasses of wine is kind of a lot. You need someone to tell you what you're like when drunk. Do you always need to drink to be excited to be with your friends when you're out? Skip the wine next time.

No. I don't drink alcohol myself, but I do know that 2 drinks on a night out with a meal is pretty standard, even for women. The medical definition
of binge drinking starts at 4 drinks for women, and this is well below it.

I'm picking up a shaming tone in your post, and that says so very much more about you and your problems then about OP. It's kind of gross.

I don't care if you think it's shaming. 2 glasses is a lot for a lot of women and if OP is acting silly then her husband is doing her a favor pointing it out. We've all seen sloppy drunk friends. OP says she doesn't go out much so if she's suddenly drinking it can be a lot at once.

No, it's not. Go away with your nonsense.

It's half a bottle of wine. If you think that's nothing then maybe you have a drinking problem.

Again, no one cares what you think. Normal people are talking. Two glasses during the course of the night with food is nothing.

AND even if OP was tispy, SO EFFING WHAT. She was having fun with her friends, letting loose. Perhaps if you took your stick out every once in a while, you would see what a great benefit to mental health that was. You're an ass just like her DH.

Who gives a hoot what a teetotaler thinks about alcohol? Either OP drinks a shit ton at home and 2 drinks is nothing or she's on a bender on a rare night out and 2 drinks will hit her harder. She should ask her friends what she's like.

Wow. That's a helluva lot of black and white thinking. Are you an alcoholic?

Are you? This is in the health forum and op mentioned it. Is it a good health decision or not?

No, she never asked if you thought two glasses of wine was good for her health. You are the one who is desperately trying to make it a thing.

Op mentioned it and can defend her own alcohol choices.

No, she doesn't need to defend consuming two glasses of wine during a special night out. Again, go away. You're really tiresome and you are derailing the thread with your own agenda.

.

It’s always a special night isn't it? She has lots of life problems. Clearly.

I have no idea how many problems she has, but it pales in comparison to all of the problems you have and keep bothering us with.

"Us"? You and your shadow. OPs husband respectfully brought up his issues the next day. He didn't fight with her when she got home like some might do. OP has some kind of next day regret. What actual advice has anyone given her here? Drink and club more? Get a divorce?

Probably as "respectfully" as you.

If this was about caring about OP, there are gentle and respectful ways to talk about it. However, you made it about you, your own feelings, and your need to control and shame others.

And no, I don't drink myself. God.

What are you prattling on about? Are you this insecure about your own life that you heavily identify with OPs problems?

Nope.

My religion encourages me not to drink. It also is pretty clear about not taking delight or pride in the shaming of others. We are apparently of very different belief systems.

OP wanted health/wellness input. You think encouraging her drinking is a good decision?

Where did she say she wanted that? You simply can't write anything without making stuff up.

"Not sure where to post this but I may appreciate health/wellness - minded responses so here goes..."

It's the very first line in the OP. You sound like an enabler cheering on her bad choices. If she just wanted relationship advice she could have gone there.

Here you are yet again trying to derail the thread. No one cares what you think about her two glasses of wine. You have zero understanding of what she was ACTUALLY asking about.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


Try harder.

Since you're not allowed to drink your husband probably doesn't even let you do out dancing either. Not sure what you though you could add to this conversations.

"do out dancing"

"what you though you could"

"to this conversations"


I mean this very gently: you may be slurring your words a bit, there.

Not trying hard enough, apparently. I'm sure you'll get there someday.

https://www.khanacademy.org/

Anonymous wrote:


Try harder.

Since you're not allowed to drink your husband probably doesn't even let you do out dancing either. Not sure what you though you could add to this conversations.

Try harder.

Anonymous wrote:
Instead she came here to be sneered at by some math-challenged person with personality issues, at a minimum.

So it goes.

OP is likely a troll who posted and ran. You seem pretty tightly wound maybe a drink would actually help someone as bitter and angry as you are. But your "religion" forbids it and you have no mind of your own.

Instead she came here to be sneered at by some math-challenged person with personality issues, at a minimum.

So it goes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two glasses of wine is kind of a lot. You need someone to tell you what you're like when drunk. Do you always need to drink to be excited to be with your friends when you're out? Skip the wine next time.

No. I don't drink alcohol myself, but I do know that 2 drinks on a night out with a meal is pretty standard, even for women. The medical definition
of binge drinking starts at 4 drinks for women, and this is well below it.

I'm picking up a shaming tone in your post, and that says so very much more about you and your problems then about OP. It's kind of gross.

I don't care if you think it's shaming. 2 glasses is a lot for a lot of women and if OP is acting silly then her husband is doing her a favor pointing it out. We've all seen sloppy drunk friends. OP says she doesn't go out much so if she's suddenly drinking it can be a lot at once.

No, it's not. Go away with your nonsense.

It's half a bottle of wine. If you think that's nothing then maybe you have a drinking problem.

Again, no one cares what you think. Normal people are talking. Two glasses during the course of the night with food is nothing.

AND even if OP was tispy, SO EFFING WHAT. She was having fun with her friends, letting loose. Perhaps if you took your stick out every once in a while, you would see what a great benefit to mental health that was. You're an ass just like her DH.

Who gives a hoot what a teetotaler thinks about alcohol? Either OP drinks a shit ton at home and 2 drinks is nothing or she's on a bender on a rare night out and 2 drinks will hit her harder. She should ask her friends what she's like.

Wow. That's a helluva lot of black and white thinking. Are you an alcoholic?

Are you? This is in the health forum and op mentioned it. Is it a good health decision or not?

No, she never asked if you thought two glasses of wine was good for her health. You are the one who is desperately trying to make it a thing.

Op mentioned it and can defend her own alcohol choices.

No, she doesn't need to defend consuming two glasses of wine during a special night out. Again, go away. You're really tiresome and you are derailing the thread with your own agenda.

.

It’s always a special night isn't it? She has lots of life problems. Clearly.

I have no idea how many problems she has, but it pales in comparison to all of the problems you have and keep bothering us with.

"Us"? You and your shadow. OPs husband respectfully brought up his issues the next day. He didn't fight with her when she got home like some might do. OP has some kind of next day regret. What actual advice has anyone given her here? Drink and club more? Get a divorce?

Probably as "respectfully" as you.

If this was about caring about OP, there are gentle and respectful ways to talk about it. However, you made it about you, your own feelings, and your need to control and shame others.

And no, I don't drink myself. God.

What are you prattling on about? Are you this insecure about your own life that you heavily identify with OPs problems?

Nope.

My religion encourages me not to drink. It also is pretty clear about not taking delight or pride in the shaming of others. We are apparently of very different belief systems.

OP wanted health/wellness input. You think encouraging her drinking is a good decision?

Where did she say she wanted that? You simply can't write anything without making stuff up.

"Not sure where to post this but I may appreciate health/wellness - minded responses so here goes..."

It's the very first line in the OP. You sound like an enabler cheering on her bad choices. If she just wanted relationship advice she could have gone there.