Anonymous
03/14/2026 10:58
Subject: Re:In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:"My spouse and I are in our fifties. I finally got to where I just couldn't deal with sex no matter how much I loved him. I gave him the option of seeking sex elsewhere. He has. He's happy and so am I. We think this will work for us. We both know it's possible it could end the marriage. We both hope it won't. If it does, it does."
I'm curious about what this PP experienced that made her feel she couldn't deal with sex any longer despite still being in love with her DH. Are we talking physical or medical problems or something else? It must be really severe if it was bad enough that you'd give a hall pass.
It was a combo of a sexual abuse history and menopause that totally killed whatever sex drive I had to begin with.
Why would he marry you knowing you had an SA history? I don’t understand this at all.
I don't know why I read this threads. They make me so angry.
Anonymous
03/14/2026 10:52
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Why would sex be any different than any other physical activity? No one should expect to do it two times a year and have it be great - practice is important and I think that is run for both partners.
Anonymous
03/14/2026 10:41
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
I think you are right. I didn’t use it and lost it….
Anonymous
03/14/2026 10:33
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:70. Together 50 years. Still regularly sexually active. 6x month? Don't track it. No ed drugs ever. No hrt ever. More lube than pre menopause.
Hope it continues. Have no expectations for anything at this age. Just gratitude for what I have.
Really unbelievable.
This is not the norm.
Glad this is somebody's story.
No HRT? Yeah right.
I am a 60 year old woman who never had HRT madly in love with a 51 year old. No lube, ED, etc
My gf is 70 and she wants to do it 3-4X per week. I’m 64 and am thrilled for any action at all after decades with a frigid ex.
I know my gf is a freak of nature but I think she never stopped using it, and it’s kind of a use-it-or-lose-it thing for women.
Anonymous
03/14/2026 10:21
Subject: Re:In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:"My spouse and I are in our fifties. I finally got to where I just couldn't deal with sex no matter how much I loved him. I gave him the option of seeking sex elsewhere. He has. He's happy and so am I. We think this will work for us. We both know it's possible it could end the marriage. We both hope it won't. If it does, it does."
I'm curious about what this PP experienced that made her feel she couldn't deal with sex any longer despite still being in love with her DH. Are we talking physical or medical problems or something else? It must be really severe if it was bad enough that you'd give a hall pass.
It was a combo of a sexual abuse history and menopause that totally killed whatever sex drive I had to begin with.
Why would he marry you knowing you had an SA history? I don’t understand this at all.
I suspect my ex was abused as a child…that and menopause killed her sex drive too. But it’s either a repressed memory or a secret she intends to keep to her grave. I suspect that’s true of many if not most survivors of childhood SA.
Anonymous
03/13/2026 20:51
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:70. Together 50 years. Still regularly sexually active. 6x month? Don't track it. No ed drugs ever. No hrt ever. More lube than pre menopause.
Hope it continues. Have no expectations for anything at this age. Just gratitude for what I have.
Really unbelievable.
This is not the norm.
Glad this is somebody's story.
No HRT? Yeah right.
I am a 60 year old woman who never had HRT madly in love with a 51 year old. No lube, ED, etc
Anonymous
03/13/2026 20:50
Subject: Re:In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:"My spouse and I are in our fifties. I finally got to where I just couldn't deal with sex no matter how much I loved him. I gave him the option of seeking sex elsewhere. He has. He's happy and so am I. We think this will work for us. We both know it's possible it could end the marriage. We both hope it won't. If it does, it does."
I'm curious about what this PP experienced that made her feel she couldn't deal with sex any longer despite still being in love with her DH. Are we talking physical or medical problems or something else? It must be really severe if it was bad enough that you'd give a hall pass.
It was a combo of a sexual abuse history and menopause that totally killed whatever sex drive I had to begin with.
Why would he marry you knowing you had an SA history? I don’t understand this at all.
Anonymous
03/13/2026 16:51
Subject: Re:In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:"My spouse and I are in our fifties. I finally got to where I just couldn't deal with sex no matter how much I loved him. I gave him the option of seeking sex elsewhere. He has. He's happy and so am I. We think this will work for us. We both know it's possible it could end the marriage. We both hope it won't. If it does, it does."
I'm curious about what this PP experienced that made her feel she couldn't deal with sex any longer despite still being in love with her DH. Are we talking physical or medical problems or something else? It must be really severe if it was bad enough that you'd give a hall pass.
It was a combo of a sexual abuse history and menopause that totally killed whatever sex drive I had to begin with.
Anonymous
03/13/2026 15:14
Subject: Re:In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
"My spouse and I are in our fifties. I finally got to where I just couldn't deal with sex no matter how much I loved him. I gave him the option of seeking sex elsewhere. He has. He's happy and so am I. We think this will work for us. We both know it's possible it could end the marriage. We both hope it won't. If it does, it does."
I'm curious about what this PP experienced that made her feel she couldn't deal with sex any longer despite still being in love with her DH. Are we talking physical or medical problems or something else? It must be really severe if it was bad enough that you'd give a hall pass.
I'm curious about what this PP experienced that made her feel she couldn't deal with sex any longer despite still being in love with her DH. Are we talking physical or medical problems or something else? It must be really severe if it was bad enough that you'd give a hall pass.
Anonymous
03/13/2026 14:04
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Even if men > 40 don't have full blown ED, most are not as firm unless using pills
Anonymous
03/11/2026 23:29
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:I’m 50, married 26 years. He’s the absolute best man in every way but if he said he was done (or if I felt I could say I’m done) I would be SO RELIEVED. I’ve heard this can change with HRT so maybe I’ll feel differently someday. We’re only 3-4 times/month. But right now I’d be good with never. The thought of still doing it in my 60s in inconceivable.
My spouse and I are in our fifties. I finally got to where I just couldn't deal with sex no matter how much I loved him. I gave him the option of seeking sex elsewhere. He has. He's happy and so am I. We think this will work for us. We both know it's possible it could end the marriage. We both hope it won't. If it does, it does.
Anonymous
03/11/2026 23:14
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:70. Together 50 years. Still regularly sexually active. 6x month? Don't track it. No ed drugs ever. No hrt ever. More lube than pre menopause.
Hope it continues. Have no expectations for anything at this age. Just gratitude for what I have.
Really unbelievable.
This is not the norm.
Glad this is somebody's story.
No HRT? Yeah right.
Anonymous
03/11/2026 17:59
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
70. Together 50 years. Still regularly sexually active. 6x month? Don't track it. No ed drugs ever. No hrt ever. More lube than pre menopause.
Hope it continues. Have no expectations for anything at this age. Just gratitude for what I have.
Hope it continues. Have no expectations for anything at this age. Just gratitude for what I have.
Anonymous
03/11/2026 15:35
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:I’m 50, married 26 years. He’s the absolute best man in every way but if he said he was done (or if I felt I could say I’m done) I would be SO RELIEVED. I’ve heard this can change with HRT so maybe I’ll feel differently someday. We’re only 3-4 times/month. But right now I’d be good with never. The thought of still doing it in my 60s in inconceivable.
I hope he moves on from you to someone younger.
Anonymous
03/11/2026 15:31
Subject: In a marriage, how many years do you expect to be sexually active?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Most men get ED in the 40's and women are peri and angry from being dumped on for years. It's not sexy any more.
Especially if everyone is out of shape or the new glp-1 fat skinny.
You both sound mentally not all there.