I was the kid who had to all the laundry for a family of 5, including ironing those horrible cotton mens shirts of the 80s, from the age of 12. I don’t think it taught me that much other than I haven’t ironed anything in 30 plus years. I take it to the dry cleaners. I would rather spend money than iron.

Truthfully, my daughter doesn’t do many chores. She is 13, works hard in school, has tons of activities and is exhausted. I prefer her sleeping in on weekends to getting up and doing her own laundry. She knows how to do it in a pinch. She spent about 4 hours this past Saturday reorganizing her entire room, getting rid of stuff she has outgrown, going through all her books, etc. My husband and I helped, but she knows how to organize and wipe down shelves, etc when she needs to do this as an adult. She unloads the dishwasher, vacuums and helps shred stuff from time to time. We have a maid service that comes every two weeks so none of us are scrubbing bathrooms.

She was an intern for a musical theater camp this past summer and had to scrape gum off chairs and clean up when a kid puked — she will be fine.

I never did my laundry, or much of any chore, until I moved out of my parents' house. Same for my husband. My kids did a lot more vacuuming and dusting of our house than my husband and I when we were kids, because it's a chore I personally detest, ha.

We all did very well when we moved out. It's not hard to do laundry, or any other chore!

I've spent 15+ years on DCUM and it's always very amusing to see parents try to one-up each other on that topic and claim that it prepares kids to be independent or something. The 3-4 year olds unloading the dishwasher is a particularly ridiculous example I've seen multiple times over the years. There's no learning curve to speak of. I showed my oldest how to work the washer and dryer a week before he went to college, and he never had any trouble. He did practically zero cooking at home, and uses his shared apartment kitchen more than any of his roommates, just by watching YouTube videos for his favorite meals. He keeps an eye on the cleaning schedule of the shared bathroom, and is the only one who brought a vacuum, apparently, and uses it.

I like to run a tight ship at home, and it's easier in terms of household water use and planning if I do the laundry for everyone. We also eat as a family as much as can, and most of the time we parents do the cooking. Kids take leftovers to school.

If your kids want to participate, great. If they're super busy and it stresses them out, there's no reason to force them. They're going to learn rapidly as soon as they need to.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mine never did. They learned at college. When they come now they prefer to do it themselves.

I don't think this is that unusual. At college you find friends and figure out stuff together. It's amazing. It's bonding. Some will be good a laundry and some will help with computers, cell phones, etc. I remember a group of us sitting together senior year to help a hallmate get the classes she needed to graduate on time. This was before computer registrations! And I guess the advising office was closed. We sifted through all the requirements to graduate and all her classes.

Your kids will have a blast learning laundry at college, or your kids will be the amazing kid who teaches others.

I helped my future husband figure out the laundry machines at college. He changed my tire.

Anonymous wrote:Mine never did. They learned at college. When they come now they prefer to do it themselves.

I don't think this is that unusual. At college you find friends and figure out stuff together. It's amazing. It's bonding. Some will be good a laundry and some will help with computers, cell phones, etc. I remember a group of us sitting together senior year to help a hallmate get the classes she needed to graduate on time. This was before computer registrations! And I guess the advising office was closed. We sifted through all the requirements to graduate and all her classes.

Your kids will have a blast learning laundry at college, or your kids will be the amazing kid who teaches others.

I've always done laundry as it works out best for our family. I did have my kid run a couple of loads senior year and he was good to go. Not a big deal.

My teens do their own laundry. Sometimes my DH will rotate from the washer to the dryer for them but other than that they deal with it. My 12 year old puts away his laundry after DH washes/dries and I fold.
I take care of washing the towels and sheets since I wash them on hot.

My 14 YO does not do her laundry. I do the whole families laundry over the weekend. My Mom did the same. I will eventually teach her but its really not that hard. I only started doing my own laundry in college and I survived just fine. She does have other chores but it doesn't make sense to have her running half empty loads of laundry at random points during the week.

I don't think it's important for teens to do their own laundry. I do think it's important that teens contribute to the household in a real way. If it makes more sense for your household for you to do all the laundry (particularly if weekends are busy and you work from home, that makes sense, or if it's just a chore you don't mind) then great. Maybe instead your teen is cooking dinner twice a week or is in charge of the dishes, or does two walks a day with the dog, or vacuums weekly, or something.

You do need to make sure they know how to do the laundry before they're 18, but if their chores are something else, that's fine.

I think the real problem is teens that are not expected to contribute to the household in any real way. That's bad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my son went away to college he had to help other kids figure out how to use the laundry machines in the dorms. He was shocked they had no life skills.

They more likely they were unfamiliar with the machines dorm used. You literally just pick a temp, cycle size, regular/delicate and press start. It doesn’t take yrs of practice.

+1 And they no longer need quarters - finding enough of those was the hardest part by far of doing laundry in college.

My current freshman reported that some in their dorm had never done laundry and ruined some clothes. But they survived and learned how to do laundry.

Doing your own at home is more about taking care of yourself and your things as part of the home team.

Mine do theirs sometimes. Sometimes I pick up the slack if they need me to.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my son went away to college he had to help other kids figure out how to use the laundry machines in the dorms. He was shocked they had no life skills.

They more likely they were unfamiliar with the machines dorm used. You literally just pick a temp, cycle size, regular/delicate and press start. It doesn’t take yrs of practice.

+1 And they no longer need quarters - finding enough of those was the hardest part by far of doing laundry in college.

I’m pretty strict and mine don’t generally do theirs. My daughter usually puts hers in and sometimes changes it but I often change it and fold it, since it’s usually done after she’s gone to bed.
For my son, I basically always do his. His stuff stinks and I want to make sure it’s washed correctly to get rid of the smell.
They both have lots of other chores.

Also, I really don’t want them breaking my washing machine by overloading it or leaving crap in their pockets. My mom never let us do laundry, even though we otherwise worked like dogs, because she couldn’t afford to replace the washing machine. And we all learned to do laundry, so I don’t see it as a big deal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my son went away to college he had to help other kids figure out how to use the laundry machines in the dorms. He was shocked they had no life skills.

That’s quite a leap.

My college boyfriend had to teach me.

Lol…did you just wear dirty clothes until you found a boyfriend?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my son went away to college he had to help other kids figure out how to use the laundry machines in the dorms. He was shocked they had no life skills.

That’s quite a leap.

My college boyfriend had to teach me.

My kids have helped do their own laundry in some capacity since they were very little. Starting in MS, I had them take more responsibility and build awareness (“looks like your fav hoodie is dirty; should we throw it in washer so you can wear tomorrow?”). By HS, they do almost all of it with occasional reminder (“washer is open; want to run a load?”) and help for hectic weeks (ie, sports uniform for multiple games per week).

No, my teen knows how and can and will sometimes throw something in but I do it all together. Sometimes they fold, sometimes do. They are in tons of activities.