Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Paraeducator. Short days, get experience, healthcare included, if your principal is good and likes you they might find a job like front desk etc for you.
What did you do before you got married?
Part time paraeducators don’t get benefits.
Anonymous wrote:Home caregiver for elderly, often required only mornings
Anonymous wrote:If you have a professional background, contact staffing agencies relates to what you did (bookkeeping, paralegal, communications). You may be able to find a part-time, and or work from home gig that could work. You may need to take something you don’t love, but it pays and gets you started, then you can be more selective moving forward.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You need to give up on a 9-2 schedule. Your kids will be fine with fewer activities, carpools and/or a PT nanny. Plenty of women work full days with kids and it’s manageable.
And plenty of those women aren’t mothers of kids who just lost their father. When my husband died, my kids benefited greatly from continuing with their prior activities and schedules while they adjusted to all of the other changes such a big loss brings. OP isn’t trying to keep it the same forever, but is trying to do what’s best for her family in this particular moment.
Thank you for understanding. My kids need to be with their friends and their adult mentors, particularly their male coaches and instructors. I don’t want to isolate them at home or have them face further losses just now.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You need to give up on a 9-2 schedule. Your kids will be fine with fewer activities, carpools and/or a PT nanny. Plenty of women work full days with kids and it’s manageable.
And plenty of those women aren’t mothers of kids who just lost their father. When my husband died, my kids benefited greatly from continuing with their prior activities and schedules while they adjusted to all of the other changes such a big loss brings. OP isn’t trying to keep it the same forever, but is trying to do what’s best for her family in this particular moment.
Thank you for understanding. My kids need to be with their friends and their adult mentors, particularly their male coaches and instructors. I don’t want to isolate them at home or have them face further losses just now.
This impulse is both understandable and arguably misguided. Your lives have changed, pretending they have not is going to be counterproductive. The kids need to adapt to the new reality, as do you. Your priority should be your future financial security, not trying to completely insulate your kids from the impact of the loss you all have experienced by funding entirely optional social/sports/arts whatever activities. Get a full-time job with benefits and develop a solid financial plan for your retirement. That should be your highest priority, not trying to keep everything status quo ante, as nice (and as unrealistic) as that would be.
If you haven’t lost your spouse and had to raise kids that lost their parent you have no basis to tell OP that her plan is misguided. You try starting a brand new career while raising traumatized kids and report back on how well that goes.
As a mom, you have to do what you have to do. If you can’t afford your house no amount of extra curricular activities will make up for it. I think people here are really encouraging OP to think realistically rather than emotionally. It’s hard but it’s what needs to be done.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You need to give up on a 9-2 schedule. Your kids will be fine with fewer activities, carpools and/or a PT nanny. Plenty of women work full days with kids and it’s manageable.
And plenty of those women aren’t mothers of kids who just lost their father. When my husband died, my kids benefited greatly from continuing with their prior activities and schedules while they adjusted to all of the other changes such a big loss brings. OP isn’t trying to keep it the same forever, but is trying to do what’s best for her family in this particular moment.
Thank you for understanding. My kids need to be with their friends and their adult mentors, particularly their male coaches and instructors. I don’t want to isolate them at home or have them face further losses just now.
This impulse is both understandable and arguably misguided. Your lives have changed, pretending they have not is going to be counterproductive. The kids need to adapt to the new reality, as do you. Your priority should be your future financial security, not trying to completely insulate your kids from the impact of the loss you all have experienced by funding entirely optional social/sports/arts whatever activities. Get a full-time job with benefits and develop a solid financial plan for your retirement. That should be your highest priority, not trying to keep everything status quo ante, as nice (and as unrealistic) as that would be.
If you haven’t lost your spouse and had to raise kids that lost their parent you have no basis to tell OP that her plan is misguided. You try starting a brand new career while raising traumatized kids and report back on how well that goes.
As a mom, you have to do what you have to do. If you can’t afford your house no amount of extra curricular activities will make up for it. I think people here are really encouraging OP to think realistically rather than emotionally. It’s hard but it’s what needs to be done.
This. Losses happen. Coping requires clearminded planning for a new reality, not behaviors which try to mask the situation which will ultimately make outcomes worse.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You need to give up on a 9-2 schedule. Your kids will be fine with fewer activities, carpools and/or a PT nanny. Plenty of women work full days with kids and it’s manageable.
And plenty of those women aren’t mothers of kids who just lost their father. When my husband died, my kids benefited greatly from continuing with their prior activities and schedules while they adjusted to all of the other changes such a big loss brings. OP isn’t trying to keep it the same forever, but is trying to do what’s best for her family in this particular moment.
Thank you for understanding. My kids need to be with their friends and their adult mentors, particularly their male coaches and instructors. I don’t want to isolate them at home or have them face further losses just now.
This impulse is both understandable and arguably misguided. Your lives have changed, pretending they have not is going to be counterproductive. The kids need to adapt to the new reality, as do you. Your priority should be your future financial security, not trying to completely insulate your kids from the impact of the loss you all have experienced by funding entirely optional social/sports/arts whatever activities. Get a full-time job with benefits and develop a solid financial plan for your retirement. That should be your highest priority, not trying to keep everything status quo ante, as nice (and as unrealistic) as that would be.
If you haven’t lost your spouse and had to raise kids that lost their parent you have no basis to tell OP that her plan is misguided. You try starting a brand new career while raising traumatized kids and report back on how well that goes.
As a mom, you have to do what you have to do. If you can’t afford your house no amount of extra curricular activities will make up for it. I think people here are really encouraging OP to think realistically rather than emotionally. It’s hard but it’s what needs to be done.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You need to give up on a 9-2 schedule. Your kids will be fine with fewer activities, carpools and/or a PT nanny. Plenty of women work full days with kids and it’s manageable.
And plenty of those women aren’t mothers of kids who just lost their father. When my husband died, my kids benefited greatly from continuing with their prior activities and schedules while they adjusted to all of the other changes such a big loss brings. OP isn’t trying to keep it the same forever, but is trying to do what’s best for her family in this particular moment.
Thank you for understanding. My kids need to be with their friends and their adult mentors, particularly their male coaches and instructors. I don’t want to isolate them at home or have them face further losses just now.
This impulse is both understandable and arguably misguided. Your lives have changed, pretending they have not is going to be counterproductive. The kids need to adapt to the new reality, as do you. Your priority should be your future financial security, not trying to completely insulate your kids from the impact of the loss you all have experienced by funding entirely optional social/sports/arts whatever activities. Get a full-time job with benefits and develop a solid financial plan for your retirement. That should be your highest priority, not trying to keep everything status quo ante, as nice (and as unrealistic) as that would be.
If you haven’t lost your spouse and had to raise kids that lost their parent you have no basis to tell OP that her plan is misguided. You try starting a brand new career while raising traumatized kids and report back on how well that goes.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:You need to give up on a 9-2 schedule. Your kids will be fine with fewer activities, carpools and/or a PT nanny. Plenty of women work full days with kids and it’s manageable.
And plenty of those women aren’t mothers of kids who just lost their father. When my husband died, my kids benefited greatly from continuing with their prior activities and schedules while they adjusted to all of the other changes such a big loss brings. OP isn’t trying to keep it the same forever, but is trying to do what’s best for her family in this particular moment.
Thank you for understanding. My kids need to be with their friends and their adult mentors, particularly their male coaches and instructors. I don’t want to isolate them at home or have them face further losses just now.
This impulse is both understandable and arguably misguided. Your lives have changed, pretending they have not is going to be counterproductive. The kids need to adapt to the new reality, as do you. Your priority should be your future financial security, not trying to completely insulate your kids from the impact of the loss you all have experienced by funding entirely optional social/sports/arts whatever activities. Get a full-time job with benefits and develop a solid financial plan for your retirement. That should be your highest priority, not trying to keep everything status quo ante, as nice (and as unrealistic) as that would be.
Anonymous wrote:Alimony is still a thing? I thought that was a thing of the past.