Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 08:28     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:Happily married DW here. I check out men all the time. I find fewer than 1% actually attractive enough to think “ooh, who is THAT.” Perhaps it’s 1 in 1000 people I see. And of course I don’t act on it! What do you want me to do, stare at my shoes pretending no one else exists? My DH checks out women. Never obviously and never really in front of me (at least not on purpose), but he’s human. I’d hate it if he were some frigid dude only into his solitary hobby.



Looking at other human beings is not the same thing as "checking them out". That's what you do afer you glance and realize there is someone actually attractive in the store (very rare).

No one is "checking out" 50_ year old men at Michaels or World Market. Its unusual for men that age to be in those stores, so that might merit a surprised glance. But no one find 50+ year old men eye candy enough to be "checking out".
Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 08:26     Subject: Re:Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your 50, married, and looking at other women at the grocery store and posting about it on DCUM.

Is that normal married men behavior??

Yes


Sad


As sad as being a fat 54 yo woman with no husband?
Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 08:24     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Let's say you're a man in this situation and want to take things further. What do you do or say? I'm roughly in OP's situation fairly often, maybe once or twice a week. I wasn't a big lady's man when I was younger but now I've got a bit of a silver fox thing going. I'm not sure how to actually talk to women in stores, at crosswalks, etc.




NP. Woman here. You should find an innocent topic to remark on or pose a question. The remark or question should be from the immediate surroundings:
"Oh, it's nice they carry these chocolate oranges this year, too!"
Then: "Do you shop here often? My daughter wanted me to get Christmas stockings."
And so on, picking up on her replies.

After a three-minute conversation, after she could see that you are not a creep, you can say: "I have enjoyed talking to you. I'd love to see you again, if you don't mind." Then she either gives uou her phone number or you give her yours.


Or, hear me out, I could do my grocery shopping without being subjected to public harassment?


DP.

Do you feel harassed when women talk to you at the grocery store or is this only an issue when men do it?

And you can always nod and quickly look away if you are not interested in small talk.
Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 06:14     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Let's say you're a man in this situation and want to take things further. What do you do or say? I'm roughly in OP's situation fairly often, maybe once or twice a week. I wasn't a big lady's man when I was younger but now I've got a bit of a silver fox thing going. I'm not sure how to actually talk to women in stores, at crosswalks, etc.




NP. Woman here. You should find an innocent topic to remark on or pose a question. The remark or question should be from the immediate surroundings:
"Oh, it's nice they carry these chocolate oranges this year, too!"
Then: "Do you shop here often? My daughter wanted me to get Christmas stockings."
And so on, picking up on her replies.

After a three-minute conversation, after she could see that you are not a creep, you can say: "I have enjoyed talking to you. I'd love to see you again, if you don't mind." Then she either gives uou her phone number or you give her yours.


Or, hear me out, I could do my grocery shopping without being subjected to public harassment?
Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 02:40     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
OP, has it occurred to you that you were staring creepily, and they might have been glancing at you because you made them uneasy and they wanted to keep their eye on the weird old guy who kept staring?
Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 02:37     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Happily married DW here. I check out men all the time. I find fewer than 1% actually attractive enough to think “ooh, who is THAT.” Perhaps it’s 1 in 1000 people I see. And of course I don’t act on it! What do you want me to do, stare at my shoes pretending no one else exists? My DH checks out women. Never obviously and never really in front of me (at least not on purpose), but he’s human. I’d hate it if he were some frigid dude only into his solitary hobby.

Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 01:30     Subject: Re:Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:Same thing at Michaels. I was there with my tween DDs and seemed to be getting looks. I don't wear a wedding ring (work reasons) so maybe they assumed I was a divorced dad.


I hope you don’t think they were checking you out?? Ha! I am laughing…men truly have enormous egos
Anonymous
Post 12/16/2025 01:17     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
they were nervous smiles to avoid getting assaulted by your creepy asss
Anonymous
Post 12/15/2025 23:32     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:They were probably wondering what you were doing in World Market at noon on a Monday.


Lloyd Dobler: I got a question. If you guys know so much about women, how come you're here at like the Gas 'n' Sip on a Saturday night completely alone drinking beers with no women anywhere?

Joe: By choice, man.


Thanks a lot, PP. Now I have “Joe lies . . . Joe lies when he cries” playing in my head.


Dissed in the Malibu don’t know what to do!
Anonymous
Post 12/15/2025 23:19     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Ngl, no one is freakier in bed than an early 40s woman stepping out on her marriage. You better hold on for dear life, boys.
Anonymous
Post 12/15/2025 23:16     Subject: Re:Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Same thing at Michaels. I was there with my tween DDs and seemed to be getting looks. I don't wear a wedding ring (work reasons) so maybe they assumed I was a divorced dad.
Anonymous
Post 12/15/2025 23:10     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
In this situation they were just all amazed to see a dad doing the stocking shopping!
Anonymous
Post 12/15/2025 21:58     Subject: Re:Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your 50, married, and looking at other women at the grocery store and posting about it on DCUM.

Is that normal married men behavior??

Yes


Sad
Anonymous
Post 12/15/2025 21:51     Subject: Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is why women choose the bear, creep.


What's creepy about a handsome man getting attention?


2 thumbs down.
Anonymous
Post 12/15/2025 21:50     Subject: Re:Middle Aged Women And Wandering Eye
Anonymous wrote:Your 50, married, and looking at other women at the grocery store and posting about it on DCUM.

Is that normal married men behavior??

Yes