Anonymous wrote:Apparently DC went to the counselor and told that spouse is screaming at them during arguments. Now I am worried this will start a report on our family. For what is worth we are both immigrant and in our country yelling at a child would not be considered crazy but I know for anglo people this is a big deal. I am terrified

Your child is suffering. Hence the visit to the counselor. You need to get this solved within your family asap

Anonymous wrote:Maybe this can be a wake up call to your spouse to find a better way to communicate with your DC. While it might be common is your culture, research indicates (depending on frequency and what’s being said) it can be very harmful to children. And depending on the context, possibly illegal.

lol. No.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:anglo people?

why do you think screaming at a child who you are supposed to teach and guide is the right thing to do? How do you think screaming will "help" the situation or make child care about you or what you're saying? just because you were brainwashed into thinking abuse is ok doesn't mean you have to continue to think so. Wake up mama.

dp.. my kids sometimes don't take what we seriously unless we yell at them.

Yes to be honest, this is how I was with my parents. They gave nonstop feedback on everything, mostly negative. So I began to ignore it all. They did need to yell to get my attention.

You won't get in trouble. But also I feel bad for your kid if they are this upset by it. We yell at our kids, but we don't demean or insult them (or try not to). You are both probably easily dysregulated, which I think can come from being yelled at in times in conflict. Kids these days have better emotional intelligence than parents and can see that this is wrong.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:anglo people?

why do you think screaming at a child who you are supposed to teach and guide is the right thing to do? How do you think screaming will "help" the situation or make child care about you or what you're saying? just because you were brainwashed into thinking abuse is ok doesn't mean you have to continue to think so. Wake up mama.

dp.. my kids sometimes don't take what we seriously unless we yell at them.

Leave it to DCUM to bring out all the high and mighty parents that claim they never yell or lie to their kids because they are so evolved as parents. #barf

I for sure yell at my kids from time to time. They can be little s***s and can push my buttons. I am evolved enough to know that this is about me losing my cool than good parenting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:anglo people?

why do you think screaming at a child who you are supposed to teach and guide is the right thing to do? How do you think screaming will "help" the situation or make child care about you or what you're saying? just because you were brainwashed into thinking abuse is ok doesn't mean you have to continue to think so. Wake up mama.

dp.. my kids sometimes don't take what we seriously unless we yell at them.

That is because that is what you have taught them. Shame.

Oh shut up, you insufferable POS.

NP: Read p1 then skipped to see where convo is now. Reading this very last response makes it seem like all the adults have left the chat and middle schoolers have taken over.

Name calling now? LOL! You know PP, even though this forum is anonymous, people in your real life know you’re petty & immature, so don’t think posts like this are the only sign

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:anglo people?

why do you think screaming at a child who you are supposed to teach and guide is the right thing to do? How do you think screaming will "help" the situation or make child care about you or what you're saying? just because you were brainwashed into thinking abuse is ok doesn't mean you have to continue to think so. Wake up mama.

dp.. my kids sometimes don't take what we seriously unless we yell at them.

That is because that is what you have taught them. Shame.

Oh shut up, you insufferable POS.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:anglo people?

why do you think screaming at a child who you are supposed to teach and guide is the right thing to do? How do you think screaming will "help" the situation or make child care about you or what you're saying? just because you were brainwashed into thinking abuse is ok doesn't mean you have to continue to think so. Wake up mama.

dp.. my kids sometimes don't take what we seriously unless we yell at them.

That is because that is what you have taught them. Shame.

yeah but every parents kid is not so traumatized that they go report it to the school GC and the parent couldn't care less about their kid and only about CPS. my parents were so old, they were born in a colonial country that doesnt exist anymore and they were better than you. care about your kid- read "hold on to your kids" by Gabor mate and "between parent and child". excellent books on building that trust between parent and child where they know that you always mean the best for them but kids can spot it when you lie- maybe not someone else- but you lying they can spot so you better mean it.

Anonymous wrote:If screaming was considered abuse 90% of the world would be checked by CPS. This “gentle parenting” has gone too far. You mean to tell me you don’t scream at your kids? That’s a lie.

+1 Every parent yells at their kids.

Anonymous wrote:Apparently DC went to the counselor and told that spouse is screaming at them during arguments. Now I am worried this will start a report on our family. For what is worth we are both immigrant and in our country yelling at a child would not be considered crazy but I know for anglo people this is a big deal. I am terrified

If they think they are allowed to argue with their parents you have failed to set the pecking order and respect in the house. Take their electronics away until they learn to do what they are told.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:anglo people?

why do you think screaming at a child who you are supposed to teach and guide is the right thing to do? How do you think screaming will "help" the situation or make child care about you or what you're saying? just because you were brainwashed into thinking abuse is ok doesn't mean you have to continue to think so. Wake up mama.

dp.. my kids sometimes don't take what we seriously unless we yell at them.

Leave it to DCUM to bring out all the high and mighty parents that claim they never yell or lie to their kids because they are so evolved as parents. #barf

Anonymous wrote:anglo people?

why do you think screaming at a child who you are supposed to teach and guide is the right thing to do? How do you think screaming will "help" the situation or make child care about you or what you're saying? just because you were brainwashed into thinking abuse is ok doesn't mean you have to continue to think so. Wake up mama.

dp.. my kids sometimes don't take what we seriously unless we yell at them.