Anonymous wrote:If the kid’s gait weight then please don’t say anything.

To me this is the beginning and end of the thread. If the child is going to well visits on the normal schedule, his weight is being watched closely. Babies are people, so they come in all shapes and sizes -- you don't necessarily know that a baby is underweight by looking at them. My babies were both long and were not really chunky as infants (they were chunky toddlers, then stretched out again). I had several people tell me they thought my babies were "too thin" which is such a rude thing to say to a new parent, but especially a breastfeeding mother.

But in those first few months, you go to the doctor all the time. I was also in a support group for breastfeeding moms and they had a scale at the group so I'd also weight my babies there before and after a feed just out of curiosity. Both kids gained weight exactly on track. They were growing exactly as expected with no issues, and our pediatrician never had any concerns about them. But those nosy busybodies were convinced I was depriving my babies of nutrients or something, because they had this idea of what a "healthy" infant looked like and deemed my kids too small.

Guess what, my kids are tweens now and they are still small, because being a small person runs in my family. They are also healthy, good eaters, both play sports, and sleep well.

OP doesn't know more than this baby's doctor and parents and needs to zip her lips.

My first DC sounded exactly like your friend's baby. Turned out to be tongue tie. His nursing just wasn't effective at extracting milk. He'd collapse from exhaustion before he was working so hard to suck, but wake up hungry again almost immediately because he never really got full.

It took exactly one visit to an LC to figure it out. LC encouraged us to add one bottle of formula a day while we worked through the tongue tie.

In retrospect, I'm only sorry that i waited until he was 2 months old before asking for help.

So I +1 the suggestion to mention to your friend that an LC can help her with strategies to manage the cluster feeding. Make it about helping her, not a commentary on how she's raising the baby.

Mom is doing too much pumping. Pumping replaces a nursing session.
She doesn't need that much of a stash. Mayyyybe 2-3 days of enough for daycare which at 1-1.5oz per hour and 10 hours MAX that 10-15oz x 3= 30-45oz.
Not to mention has she tested whether she has high lipase after freezing?
Baby builds her supply best as long as no ties are present. If baby is under 12 weeks ties can be present and they get enough but once they have to start working for it as your supply becomes demand only it will dip because they aren't efficient at extracting milk. She may also have low reserves but if she's pumping 3-4oz after nursing that's unlikely.

It's just a LOT of pumping.

If the kid’s gait weight then please don’t say anything.