Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.

Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war.

In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all.

And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much.

My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed.

I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability.

It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does…

Thanks for the follow up. I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a quiet space for her if she gets overwhelmed especially if they bill themselves as inclusive. I’m glad she is going back. She should not be punished for getting overwhelmed. That said, I don’t think you can expect camp will be free of noise and chaos.

Op here - thank you. The accommodation was to allow her to take a break and do a quiet activity like coloring for a few minutes if she felt overwhelmed. There was no expectation on other kids accommodating or not being typical kids.

A NT camp does not have the staff to watch your child during a meltdown. This accommodation should never have been requested.

The camp billed itself as “inclusive” per OP. And letting a child do a quiet activity is not a massive burden. Maybe you should ask yourself why you feel the need to make comments like this.

Anonymous wrote:If you didn’t disclose your DC’s diagnosis and didn’t educated them on how to handle potential meltdowns beforehand. Well, the counselor’s reaction is expected and not entirely their fault.

Anonymous wrote:ASD DD loved camp until counselor got overwhelmed and decided on a group punishment.

The chain of events kicked off with a few kids getting a bit hyper. the kids were getting bored, and probably just needed a switch to a more physical activity.

Counselor over reacted and punished the whole group making them sit silently in a corner and threatening them with school work.

Cue sense of justice, abrupt change in routine, and already at max mental load and ASD DD had an autistic meltdown. It made an already stressed counselor even more stressed which made AsD kid more stressed.. You know how this goes.

We gave our kid the option to take a day off but DD wants to go back (good).

Would you (nicely) educate counselor on what happened and how to handle it in the future or let it go?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.

Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war.

In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all.

And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much.

My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed.

I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability.

It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does…

Thanks for the follow up. I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a quiet space for her if she gets overwhelmed especially if they bill themselves as inclusive. I’m glad she is going back. She should not be punished for getting overwhelmed. That said, I don’t think you can expect camp will be free of noise and chaos.

Op here - thank you. The accommodation was to allow her to take a break and do a quiet activity like coloring for a few minutes if she felt overwhelmed. There was no expectation on other kids accommodating or not being typical kids.

A NT camp does not have the staff to watch your child during a meltdown. This accommodation should never have been requested.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.

Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war.

In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all.

And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much.

My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed.

I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability.

It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does…

Thanks for the follow up. I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a quiet space for her if she gets overwhelmed especially if they bill themselves as inclusive. I’m glad she is going back. She should not be punished for getting overwhelmed. That said, I don’t think you can expect camp will be free of noise and chaos.

Op here - thank you. The accommodation was to allow her to take a break and do a quiet activity like coloring for a few minutes if she felt overwhelmed. There was no expectation on other kids accommodating or not being typical kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.

Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war.

In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all.

And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much.

My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed.

I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability.

It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does…

Thanks for the follow up. I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a quiet space for her if she gets overwhelmed especially if they bill themselves as inclusive. I’m glad she is going back. She should not be punished for getting overwhelmed. That said, I don’t think you can expect camp will be free of noise and chaos.

Op here - thank you. The accommodation was to allow her to take a break and do a quiet activity like coloring for a few minutes if she felt overwhelmed. There was no expectation on other kids accommodating or not being typical kids.

This child needs a 1:1 or a special needs camp. You have described behavior outside the realm of typical even for ASD at age 8.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.

Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war.

In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all.

And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much.

My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed.

I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability.

It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does…

Thanks for the follow up. I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a quiet space for her if she gets overwhelmed especially if they bill themselves as inclusive. I’m glad she is going back. She should not be punished for getting overwhelmed. That said, I don’t think you can expect camp will be free of noise and chaos.

Op here - thank you. The accommodation was to allow her to take a break and do a quiet activity like coloring for a few minutes if she felt overwhelmed. There was no expectation on other kids accommodating or not being typical kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.

Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war.

In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all.

And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much.

My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed.

I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability.

It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does…

Thanks for the follow up. I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a quiet space for her if she gets overwhelmed especially if they bill themselves as inclusive. I’m glad she is going back. She should not be punished for getting overwhelmed. That said, I don’t think you can expect camp will be free of noise and chaos.

Anonymous wrote:Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.

Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war.

In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all.

And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much.

My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed.

I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability.

It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does…

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds as though you have a very clear sense of what you think happened, but I am concerned that you might be only hearing it from your kid's point of view, or you might be making assumptions and filling things in with your imagination.

As a special ed teacher, I often have parents who will call me and explain to me why something happened when they actually don't even know what happened, and their explanation doesn't match the events.

Did the meltdown happen at camp? If so, if it ended in a way that didn't come to the camp leadership's attention, and didn't result in your kid wanting to stay home, then I would take that as a win.

If the meltdown did come to the camp leadership's attention, then I would assume that they are already coaching the counselor. If they didn't exclude your child, or demand a meeting, then they must be confident that they have strategies that will work in the context of the group.

If you want to talk to them, I'd go in understanding that part autism, particularly in young children, is a distorted understanding of social situations, and that there may have been very good reasons why they asked the kids to sit rather than moving to a more physical activity. Asking kids to do something that's incompatible with unsafe behavior (e.g. asking a kid running around to sit down) is a pretty common strategy with both children and with people with ASD.

So, if the meltdown rose to the level that there were safety issues, I would go in with an open mind and say "I'd love to know more about this incident, so that we can figure out what skills and knowledge to target going forward. Can you tell me more about what happened?"

I'm also going to say that suggesting that a kid who is willing to go back into a situation stay home has the potential to backfire.

This is all really excellent perspective - thank you and I hope you comment more here! My only caveat is that sometimes the child actually does have a valid additional perspective of the facts that the teacher does not have. This doesn’t mean that the upshot is any different (kid may not have coping skills required for the setting) but plenty of times my kid was able to fill in more details about what actually happened when the teacher just said “he just snapped all of a sudden!” Kids on the spectrum are usually pretty honest so they are not going to actually lie even if their perspective is partial. You may work with younger kids or less verbal kids than mine though.

I largely agree with you, but a teenaged or young twenty something camp counselor is not a teacher. They aren’t trained about avoiding triggers and meltdowns so sharing the child’s perspective might not result in any change.

I still think an email should be sent and think OP should send one too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds as though you have a very clear sense of what you think happened, but I am concerned that you might be only hearing it from your kid's point of view, or you might be making assumptions and filling things in with your imagination.

As a special ed teacher, I often have parents who will call me and explain to me why something happened when they actually don't even know what happened, and their explanation doesn't match the events.

Did the meltdown happen at camp? If so, if it ended in a way that didn't come to the camp leadership's attention, and didn't result in your kid wanting to stay home, then I would take that as a win.

If the meltdown did come to the camp leadership's attention, then I would assume that they are already coaching the counselor. If they didn't exclude your child, or demand a meeting, then they must be confident that they have strategies that will work in the context of the group.

If you want to talk to them, I'd go in understanding that part autism, particularly in young children, is a distorted understanding of social situations, and that there may have been very good reasons why they asked the kids to sit rather than moving to a more physical activity. Asking kids to do something that's incompatible with unsafe behavior (e.g. asking a kid running around to sit down) is a pretty common strategy with both children and with people with ASD.

So, if the meltdown rose to the level that there were safety issues, I would go in with an open mind and say "I'd love to know more about this incident, so that we can figure out what skills and knowledge to target going forward. Can you tell me more about what happened?"

I'm also going to say that suggesting that a kid who is willing to go back into a situation stay home has the potential to backfire.

This is all really excellent perspective - thank you and I hope you comment more here! My only caveat is that sometimes the child actually does have a valid additional perspective of the facts that the teacher does not have. This doesn’t mean that the upshot is any different (kid may not have coping skills required for the setting) but plenty of times my kid was able to fill in more details about what actually happened when the teacher just said “he just snapped all of a sudden!” Kids on the spectrum are usually pretty honest so they are not going to actually lie even if their perspective is partial. You may work with younger kids or less verbal kids than mine though.