All we did was help buy furniture and pay the deposit and first month's rent, gave them a 7 yo car and paid their first year of auto insurance. They then proceeded to handle everything else, including investing as well as a Roth and starting their 401K.

Given the significant financial advantage you gave your kid, of course they have money to invest invest. I hope you're not suggesting they're "making it on their own."

Anonymous wrote:No idea. Both my kids went to state schools and have access to our Amazon, Google Pay, Uber, Starbucks, Kohls, Macy's, JC Penney, Lands End, Old Navy accounts...and credit cards linked to their bank accounts.

Both are super frugal. Both also earn money through internships and invest it. Both have great friends who are also super frugal (by choice and/or by circumstance) so they do not feel compelled to spend a crazy amount. They and their friends do spend on budget travel -internationally and domestically.

We pay for every single thing. They need to save and invest everything that they earn, and they do. Some goes in Roth and then some goes into investing.

Same. It’s easy to live on nothing if you have no choice (I know, that was me in college). It’s harder, and more important for their future life, to teach a kid to be frugal by choice and not spend money that they have. Unless something dramatic happens, our kids are going to inherit substantial amounts of $$$. I need them to know how to handle that when it happens. In any case, if a kid can’t net $2-3,000 a month to sustain their lifestyle after graduating from college, something has gone terribly wrong. (FWIW, we have two older children who are fully launched and doing great, without any subsidies from Mom & Dad, so it’s worked so far).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How can a kid spend only 500 per month. Do they never get chipotle or take an uber or go
To cvs for toiletries? Thats how much I spent in college in the early 90’s

This!

My college was in a major city though, so everyone liked to go out to restaurants, clubs, etc. I was broke with $100/week.

Nobody answers a thread like this except people who want to flex on how little they spend.

These threads are dominated by the skinflints. They also say they give their kids nothing and then list all the exceptions that they pay for (books, they use the Amazon account, buy them all their toiletries, etc etc). It’s totally unhelpful for someone who wants to know how much to budget.

My kid is at college in an apartment in a big city and he spends about $1,200 to $1,500 a month for *everything* except rent (books, utilities, groceries, airfare home, eating out, etc). He eats lunch on campus most days, which is a lot of the $$, and I looked into getting him a meal plan, but it was more than he is spending. When he was in the dorm, it was more like $600-800. He is by no means the biggest spender in his cohort.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How can a kid spend only 500 per month. Do they never get chipotle or take an uber or go
To cvs for toiletries? Thats how much I spent in college in the early 90’s

This!

My college was in a major city though, so everyone liked to go out to restaurants, clubs, etc. I was broke with $100/week.

Nobody answers a thread like this except people who want to flex on how little they spend.

These threads are dominated by the skinflints. They also say they give their kids nothing and then list all the exceptions that they pay for (books, they use the Amazon account, buy them all their toiletries, etc etc). It’s totally unhelpful for someone who wants to know how much to budget.

My kid is at college in an apartment in a big city and he spends about $1,200 to $1,500 a month for *everything* except rent (books, utilities, groceries, airfare home, eating out, etc). He eats lunch on campus most days, which is a lot of the $$, and I looked into getting him a meal plan, but it was more than he is spending. When he was in the dorm, it was more like $600-800. He is by no means the biggest spender in his cohort.

No idea. Both my kids went to state schools and have access to our Amazon, Google Pay, Uber, Starbucks, Kohls, Macy's, JC Penney, Lands End, Old Navy accounts...and credit cards linked to their bank accounts.

Both are super frugal. Both also earn money through internships and invest it. Both have great friends who are also super frugal (by choice and/or by circumstance) so they do not feel compelled to spend a crazy amount. They and their friends do spend on budget travel -internationally and domestically.

We pay for every single thing. They need to save and invest everything that they earn, and they do. Some goes in Roth and then some goes into investing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are still in HS, so I wondered how common is for kids to work on campus. When I was in college, I wasn't on financial aid so didn't have to work but still got a very part time campus job- like 5 hours a week - which along with summer job savings, paid for books and incidentals. I figured we'd have our kids do something similar.

.

Most on campus jobs go to students who are awarded work study as part of their FA. Just an FYI.

Yes, but most campuses are in areas that have jobs outside of the campus.

Plus, any kind of work experience in college is a great resume builder.

Maybe in urban areas but everywhere else requires transportation.

And it also means it might take you 30mins to get to/from the job (and cost you an Uber ride if it's dark out and the busses are not safe at that time), versus just walking 5 mins to a job on campus.
Often not worth it for a min wage job

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP- your kid needs to get a job to earn their own spending money. They are adults. They don’t need an allowance.

That's a valid approach! It's not for us, but I wouldn't disparage you for going that direction.

I want my kid to study hard and enjoy themself. They worked for their pocket money through HS, coaching and babysitting. They will work this summer in retail. Giving a moderate allowance in college is how I demonstrate that I support their education and transition into adulthood.

I show my support by paying for tuition, room/board, etc. No self respecting college student should want an allowance from their parents.

Ok, even you have to realize how absurd that sounds. NO self respecting college student? Not one??

I expect high academic achievement from my kid. I do not expect them to be the best shirt-folder at The Gap. Why on earth would I want them honing their shirt-folding skills when they should be crushing their Econ exam? They will have plenty of time to be an adult. College is a liminal space.

I tried to be nice, but damn, you make it hard.

You don’t have to be nice. Just be yourself. Your kid is watching you. You’d better hope they earn the big bucks or they’ll expect the gravy train to continue after they graduate. When does it end?

DP: When they graduate and start this first "real job". We fully funded everything for our kids. One had a summer job (but we didn't let them work during covid) and also took on a 10 hour/week job at the university (brain dead, monitor the resident hall desk for $7/hr--we told them they didnt' need to). They graduated in 4 years (despite having a rough start academically and changing majors0 with a 3.5 GPA, started job with great company 2 weeks later and are entering their 3rd year of being financially independent. All we did was help buy furniture and pay the deposit and first month's rent, gave them a 7 yo car and paid their first year of auto insurance.
They then proceeded to handle everything else, including investing as well as a Roth and starting their 401K.

Next kid is still in college, never had a job until research positions after sophomore year, continued that during junior year along with TA position, and doing research again this summer. They are at a challenging academic school, majoring in engineering, so we don't want them to waste time working in a minimally paying job that has nothing to do with their education. Given their track record, I'm certain they will find a job within a few months of graduation (it is tough out there now and likely will be next year) and be financially independent within a few months, since engineering tends to pay well.

So the gravy train ends when they graduate college and start their first real job. Most likely within a month after graduation. Helping your kids while they are kids and in college does not financially stunt their development. Their job was to do well in college, get internships/reserach positions and be ready to start their careers. As long as they are doing that well, it's all we ask while in college

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP- your kid needs to get a job to earn their own spending money. They are adults. They don’t need an allowance.

That's a valid approach! It's not for us, but I wouldn't disparage you for going that direction.

I want my kid to study hard and enjoy themself. They worked for their pocket money through HS, coaching and babysitting. They will work this summer in retail. Giving a moderate allowance in college is how I demonstrate that I support their education and transition into adulthood.

I show my support by paying for tuition, room/board, etc. No self respecting college student should want an allowance from their parents.

Ok, even you have to realize how absurd that sounds. NO self respecting college student? Not one??

I expect high academic achievement from my kid. I do not expect them to be the best shirt-folder at The Gap. Why on earth would I want them honing their shirt-folding skills when they should be crushing their Econ exam? They will have plenty of time to be an adult. College is a liminal space.

I tried to be nice, but damn, you make it hard.

You don’t have to be nice. Just be yourself. Your kid is watching you. You’d better hope they earn the big bucks or they’ll expect the gravy train to continue after they graduate. When does it end?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are still in HS, so I wondered how common is for kids to work on campus. When I was in college, I wasn't on financial aid so didn't have to work but still got a very part time campus job- like 5 hours a week - which along with summer job savings, paid for books and incidentals. I figured we'd have our kids do something similar.

.

Most on campus jobs go to students who are awarded work study as part of their FA. Just an FYI.

Yes, but most campuses are in areas that have jobs outside of the campus.

Plus, any kind of work experience in college is a great resume builder.

Maybe in urban areas but everywhere else requires transportation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP- your kid needs to get a job to earn their own spending money. They are adults. They don’t need an allowance.

That's a valid approach! It's not for us, but I wouldn't disparage you for going that direction.

I want my kid to study hard and enjoy themself. They worked for their pocket money through HS, coaching and babysitting. They will work this summer in retail. Giving a moderate allowance in college is how I demonstrate that I support their education and transition into adulthood.

This!! We can afford it, so we want our kid to focus on their education and research. They don't need to be getting paid $7/hr to work at the library or as a desk receptionist in their dorm. We would rather they be focused on studying and finding internships, etc.

However, if they are not doing well academically, we would not continue to fund all the fun stuff

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP- your kid needs to get a job to earn their own spending money. They are adults. They don’t need an allowance.

That's a valid approach! It's not for us, but I wouldn't disparage you for going that direction.

I want my kid to study hard and enjoy themself. They worked for their pocket money through HS, coaching and babysitting. They will work this summer in retail. Giving a moderate allowance in college is how I demonstrate that I support their education and transition into adulthood.

I show my support by paying for tuition, room/board, etc. No self respecting college student should want an allowance from their parents.

Ok, even you have to realize how absurd that sounds. NO self respecting college student? Not one??

I expect high academic achievement from my kid. I do not expect them to be the best shirt-folder at The Gap. Why on earth would I want them honing their shirt-folding skills when they should be crushing their Econ exam? They will have plenty of time to be an adult. College is a liminal space.

I tried to be nice, but damn, you make it hard.

Anonymous wrote:OP- your kid needs to get a job to earn their own spending money. They are adults. They don’t need an allowance.

My kids have jobs. They don't get an allowance but they do use our credit cards for whatever they want (within reason). We don't pay for nights out at the bar but pretty much everything else we pay for. I'd rather they save the money from their jobs. Everyone is different in how they approach it. There is no right answer.

3-400/mo, plus incidentals. I don't expect my kids to work during the school year. I worked a lot and missed out on a lot.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are still in HS, so I wondered how common is for kids to work on campus. When I was in college, I wasn't on financial aid so didn't have to work but still got a very part time campus job- like 5 hours a week - which along with summer job savings, paid for books and incidentals. I figured we'd have our kids do something similar.

.

Most on campus jobs go to students who are awarded work study as part of their FA. Just an FYI.

Yes, but most campuses are in areas that have jobs outside of the campus.

Plus, any kind of work experience in college is a great resume builder.

Depends on the location of the school, the year of the student, whether they are on the meal plan or living in an apartment.

Freshman year - meal plan kid spent almost nothing. Tuition room and books etc were paid out of 529. We deposited $100 per month.
Sophomore year apartment, meal plan and a ton of friends. Costs/expenses went up significantly. He used his summer earned money so I don't know what it ended up being per month.
Junior year - house, no meal plan. He was very frugal and budgeted but the costs were more than his summer earnings. Second semester we added funds to his account after he gave us an idea of costs - he provided us a monthly accounting of what he planned to spend.
Senior year - his summer internship was paid - he was in a house but went back on a partial meal plan to help budget his food costs (we paid the meal plan with the 529). He got through the semester with just a little from us as needed.