Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another suggestion to encourage friendships with great kids. Positive peer pressure is a fabulous thing.

I’m skeptical that you can have that much control over it. Other than putting them in a school with good demographics, once you drop them off in the morning, they’re going to choose who they associate with and there’s not much you can do about it.

Anonymous wrote:If I could go back I would think college when applying private hs. I would wait for hs acceptance and then dig deep into each school college counseling philosophy. Each school has their own philosophy and it is better to understand if this is a fit. Some schools have an application limit. I think this is a great thing because it is a kid stress reducer and there is an incentive for college counseling to really work with each student. You are paying a lot for hs and it is reasonable to expect this area of your school to be excellent.

Some schools will write recommendations and send out documents but will not advocate. We experienced this and it was cold. Whole experience was cold. Changed schools for second child and a world of difference. First child I was enamored with the trappings of beautiful school and fun activities and excellent classes. This is great but the college search experience was unnecessarily unemotional. I felt the counselor didn’t care about my child and it hurt. I was warned by class ahead parents but again thought it was not a big deal because we were not looking at a Harvard. Believe parents is the nugget there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had a no phones in bedroom and no phones/laptops overnight in bedroom.

When my HS kids came home, they had to plug their iphones in the kitchen. They were allowed to check them, etc. But when they were studying--they were studying.

That blue light and distraction and time suck is real. It was a PIA to get on board with it early, but it paid dividends as HS went along and now in college oldest has incredibly healthy habits. He also was always an avid reader.

I can see the difference in communication, concentration and mood when kids spend a significant time on their phones/youtube, etc. We also did not have tik tok.

100%. This is all really good advice.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stress less. There are soooooooo many colleges out there. My kid got into all 10 he applied to and got better merit aid than I expected as a B student. Focus on what’s good for your kid and the whole experience will be easy.

Your kid got into all 10… so don’t stress … is not really super advice. Your kid had a great experience applying. I’m happy for him and you. For for those looking forward, this isn’t how it will work. I think people are looking for ways to be flexible, resilient, adjust as needed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would listen to Warren Buffet's views on college and send my kid to community college first and have them work too - gain life and work skills while saving two years of potential debt. Transfer to a school of choice for the last 2 years which makes them appreciate the experience of that school even more and gives them that school's name on their Bachelor's degree diploma.

It’s nice to be Warren Buffet, I guess. Meanwhile most kids already attend public high schools and work part time. College-bound kids without a lot of family money should know that most FA and merit money is only available to FTFY freshmen. And a kid without wealthy parents cannot “transfer to a school of choice” because nearly all transfer admissions are need-aware.

You are misguided on a few things. FA is not only available to freshman. It is absolutely available to transfer students. And all kinds of financial scholarships are as well. Also, the DMV happens to have some of the best community college's in the country. And these 2 year schools have high acceptance rates in their pipeline programs to 4-year colleges across the country including colleges and universities with more difficult acceptance rates for typical freshman.

FA rules changed for transfer students this year at many T25 schools.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would listen to Warren Buffet's views on college and send my kid to community college first and have them work too - gain life and work skills while saving two years of potential debt. Transfer to a school of choice for the last 2 years which makes them appreciate the experience of that school even more and gives them that school's name on their Bachelor's degree diploma.

It’s nice to be Warren Buffet, I guess. Meanwhile most kids already attend public high schools and work part time. College-bound kids without a lot of family money should know that most FA and merit money is only available to FTFY freshmen. And a kid without wealthy parents cannot “transfer to a school of choice” because nearly all transfer admissions are need-aware.

You are misguided on a few things. FA is not only available to freshman. It is absolutely available to transfer students. And all kinds of financial scholarships are as well. Also, the DMV happens to have some of the best community college's in the country. And these 2 year schools have high acceptance rates in their pipeline programs to 4-year colleges across the country including colleges and universities with more difficult acceptance rates for typical freshman.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would listen to Warren Buffet's views on college and send my kid to community college first and have them work too - gain life and work skills while saving two years of potential debt. Transfer to a school of choice for the last 2 years which makes them appreciate the experience of that school even more and gives them that school's name on their Bachelor's degree diploma.

It’s nice to be Warren Buffet, I guess. Meanwhile most kids already attend public high schools and work part time. College-bound kids without a lot of family money should know that most FA and merit money is only available to FTFY freshmen. And a kid without wealthy parents cannot “transfer to a school of choice” because nearly all transfer admissions are need-aware.

Anonymous wrote:I would listen to Warren Buffet's views on college and send my kid to community college first and have them work too - gain life and work skills while saving two years of potential debt. Transfer to a school of choice for the last 2 years which makes them appreciate the experience of that school even more and gives them that school's name on their Bachelor's degree diploma.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would listen to Warren Buffet's views on college and send my kid to community college first and have them work too - gain life and work skills while saving two years of potential debt. Transfer to a school of choice for the last 2 years which makes them appreciate the experience of that school even more and gives them that school's name on their Bachelor's degree diploma.

You would? Did you? Will you?

I mean, agree it sounds good. But will you do this with YOUR kid?

Anonymous wrote:I would do nothing differently for my current college student. I let him dictate his course load and didn’t hover. I let him choose his ECs and didn’t stress over whether he had enough or they were good enough. I paid for tutors when he asked but didn’t push. We were realistic about the odds for top colleges and while he was bright and hardworking, we didn’t ever expect those outcomes so there could be no disappointment. We didn’t buy into USNWR ratings. He happily attends UMD where he is crushing it. Our youngest is making his college list now. He chose not to load up on APs and doesn’t have perfect grades. He will be looking at colleges with high acceptance rates. That’s ok because we know he can thrive wherever he lands. We are reminding him we love him regardless of grades, test scores, sports accomplishments or college acceptances. My best advice is to watch the old documentary The Race to Nowhere. I was fortunate to watch it when my oldest was in elementary school and it really influenced my approach.

We need to show our kids that mental health matters more than top colleges.