I don't quite get these summer orientations. Why do they do that?
My DD is going to a big state school that has this and it's a huge pain to have to get her there and break up summer plans. What happened to having events for parents during drop off?

My orientation at a SLAC was an entire week before classes started. Parents moved me in then orientation started that night (and it was a ton of fun).
It was the same for my kid who is a junior at a mid-sized school right now.

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it is important at all. We didn't go for my DD's orientation b/c we had been at other events along the way.

Not planning to go to DS's orientation -- I've already seen the agenda, and the college has many of the same videos on the same topics on their website. My kid can figure it out.

Also wondering why people say it's a milestone. Moving into college is, but this? Don't parents already know the school by that point and have been to it with their child? Also wondering if it's not counter-productive because these kids are going to have to manage their own classes, schedule, life on campus...So why are the parents so involved still and micromanaging?

Depends on the school

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are we talking orientation - which can last a week for freshmen - or admitted students day? I'm not hanging around for 1 week.

I have 4 kids that have gone to different colleges (some are still in, some graduated within the last couple years) and have never heard of orientation taking a full week.
Some of the colleges my kids went to/I know about have an optional thing where you go a week before school starts and have lots of different activities and events to participate in--but that's not "orientation." All of my kids' school orientations were between 5 hours and a full day.

DP. University of Chicago does the week before school starts as the only orientation. Parents help with move in and then there's a ceremony and they leave, but the rest of the week is the non-optional orientation.

Anonymous wrote:Are we talking orientation - which can last a week for freshmen - or admitted students day? I'm not hanging around for 1 week.

I have 4 kids that have gone to different colleges (some are still in, some graduated within the last couple years) and have never heard of orientation taking a full week.
Some of the colleges my kids went to/I know about have an optional thing where you go a week before school starts and have lots of different activities and events to participate in--but that's not "orientation." All of my kids' school orientations were between 5 hours and a full day.

Are we talking orientation - which can last a week for freshmen - or admitted students day? I'm not hanging around for 1 week.

I really think we should hold off on calling people helicopter parents if they say parents should go to the parent part of orientation. The programming is geared towards them. They are not unusual for attending it.

Summer or orientation has been a thing for decades. Yes, some schools do it right before move-in, but doing it separately in the summer is totally normal. If you don’t know this, then except the fact that you’re experience is very limited.

Also, the people who think the university should be responsible for figuring this out for you are out to lunch. I’m guessing that because of the 4 hour drive comment, this is about Virginia Tech. We shouldn’t expect giant universities to be responsible for accommodating a single student who has a unique situation.

OP, this is clearly a special situation and you have to do what is best for all involved. There are lots of good suggestions in this thread. It sounds like you already have your plan anyway. Good luck to your student.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would prioritize my kid over my mother for this.

+1000 I don't understand how this is even a question.

You people are crazy. OP is making a reasonable choice. This is not accepted students day, it is orientation. Land the helicopter.

I think you should go, and bring your mom. She'll probably like seeing where her grandson will be going to college. If she doesn't speak English, she'll probably be bored at the actual orientation events (they usually have all the parents go in an auditorium and have speakers present information) but maybe help her find a nice coffee house or lounge where she can sit and read or something? I bet if you call the university they can recommend something.

I don't think it is important at all. We didn't go for my DD's orientation b/c we had been at other events along the way.

Not planning to go to DS's orientation -- I've already seen the agenda, and the college has many of the same videos on the same topics on their website. My kid can figure it out.

Anonymous wrote:From someone who went alone.

- My parents missed all the info sessions for the them, other parent seemed to know much more about stuff

- When everyone was going out for dinner with parents, I didn't have anyone. A girl I had been hanging out with asked me to join her and her parents. It was nice of them, but now I think about how they didn't even know me and picked up the tab for me at dinner.

Love that family! No kid should be put in that position.

Anonymous wrote:I would prioritize my kid over my mother for this.

+1000 I don't understand how this is even a question.

OP, I would find a way to make it work so that you can attend. Even if you will be with him for a total of a hour, I think it will be worth it to be there.

Bring your mom along! I am sure that will be a special memory all on its own. If the AM is a drop off and it too much to get everyone out the door, maybe find an AirBNB or VRBO and leave your mom for a short time, drop him off and then attend what you can. Or have your mom come with for the whole day. I am sure there are accommodations they can/will make for her and I'm sure it would not be the first time a grandparent has attended. She might even find another grandparent to hang with?

Yes, your 18 year old is fine on his own as other posters have said, but I think the idea of knowing you are there (even if you aren't able to attend fully) is valuable, both in the moment and down the road. Will he have someone to sit with at lunch? Attend sessions with, etc etc. I would try to make the event as un-awkward as possible for him.

From someone who went alone.

- My parents missed all the info sessions for the them, other parent seemed to know much more about stuff

- When everyone was going out for dinner with parents, I didn't have anyone. A girl I had been hanging out with asked me to join her and her parents. It was nice of them, but now I think about how they didn't even know me and picked up the tab for me at dinner.

Go with your kid, OP. This is a milestone. Your mom should understand.