I’m not a fan of participating in meal trains as a giver or receiver. It’s a lot of pressure to cook a meal for someone else, especially when you’re trying to make it something easy to deliver, reheat and that will appeal to the whole family.

My family is full of picky eaters and it’s easier for us and preferable to either pick something up or order something than coordinate a time to meet someone dropping food off that there’s little chance we’ll all eat.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know, we should be grateful…

But in name of humor, what’s a meal you’ve received on your doorstep from a friend or acquaintance that was just terrible and ended up not being very helpful after all?

Anything from someone's home kitchen is getting immediately disposed of in my house. So nasty.

Genuine questions for those of you who feel this way – Do you never go to dinner parties at anyone else’s home? Or do you only attend if they are catered, and then how do you ascertain that before you RSVP in the affirmative or negative?

Or is it that you’re OK with a dinner party because you can see the food being made and the cleanliness of the house? And if that’s the case, would you accept food delivered to your house from the kitchen of someone who had made it at their house where you had Previously attended a dinner party, and deemed heir cleanliness acceptable?

Anonymous wrote:I know, we should be grateful…

But in name of humor, what’s a meal you’ve received on your doorstep from a friend or acquaintance that was just terrible and ended up not being very helpful after all?

Anything from someone's home kitchen is getting immediately disposed of in my house. So nasty.

My cherished and very generous grandmother participated in meal trains through our church well into her 80s. She was a great cook. I once went with her to deliver a meal to a family with 3 kids and a brand new fourth baby. I thought what she prepared looked just fine. It’s been a long time but I definitely remember baked chicken legs and a salad with lots of carrots and cucumbers, and a German chocolate cake. That family actually called the church and complained the meal was not good and that they had no choice but to end up ordering pizza.

They don’t have to like what an 85 year old nana brings to their home. But have some grace and tact!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like to think of myself as a good cook and thoughtful friend but I have apparently failed twice in meal train deliveries: the first was chicken pot pie "muffins" to a family with a preschooler who had just had a new baby...thought they'd be kid-friendly but the mom let me know the preschooler rejected them and she and her husband found them "a little salty." Second time, family with a new [summer] baby - we brought over freshly grilled chicken breasts & grilled peppers with all the ingredients to make chicken Caesar salads (bags of pre-chopped romaine, bottle of dressing, shredded parm, loaf of crusty bread) and the couple looked at us like we had brought them something totally exotic and questionably edible.

Chicken pot pie muffins sound good. Nice how the food arrives portioned too.

It's highly unlikely we're going to please a preschooler. Or an adult for that matter. It's highly unlikely to please unless you know what people want prepared, and how they want it prepared.

I am really surprised they gave you negative feedback after bringing them a meal. I mean if you invited them over would they have said "Thanks for inviting us. We found the food fairly salty and our preschooler would not touch it". No!

Meal trains don't work in a culture where so many people have food restrictions and where eating and food are so politicized. Forty or fifty years ago, everyone made the same thing for this situation-- some kind of casserole. Very few families with kids were vegetarian or vegan, and there was a lot less delineation in the market regarding food health and quality (no Whole Foods, no organic anything, no debates over hormones, additives, processed food, etc.). Whether you were working class, middle class, or professional class, you'd make a lasagna and the recipient would thank you graciously.

That doesn't work now. People think casseroles are low class, too heavy. Don't eat meat or bread. Watching their salt intake. What food would be universally acceptable now? That makes sense to transport and would keep for a bit in the freezer if need be? There isn't one.

Shut it down.

The midwestern casseroles were the worst. Overcooked, under seasoned meat. Random, sometimes strongly flavored things like pickle slices, olives, and raisins in oddly sweet creamy sauces. And then, on top, things that had been crunchy once like Fritos, ritz crackers, potato chips, or pretzels, but got soggy from steaming under a the plastic life

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was part of a mom’s preschool group that made a meal train for me when I had my second child. So, granted, the person who signed up to bring this wasn’t my BFF of anything. So I give her a pass..

But I was sent “pizza pasta.” It was cooked noodled, some pepperoni, a jar of sauce, and bag of mozzarella dumped on top, all in an aluminium casserole dish. Plus box of generic frozen Texas toast garlic bread. Whole things was tossed. Yuck. If you are going to sign up for a meal train, don’t send bare minimum packaged stuff.

People give these things in disposable trays for a reason, dipshit. The fact that you would ding her for not making more work for you - having to wash and return a casserole dish while taking care of a newborn - says a lot about you. That, and how you couldn’t figure out that she was trying to make a dish that a preschooler would eat.

No issue with the tray. But don’t send someone a meal of packaged pepperoni, a jar of sauce, and a bag of cheese dumped over noddles. That isn’t even cooking.

You aren't entitled to someone else's time and energy and money. If you want a certain kind if food, make it yourself or pay someone to prepare it for you.

If you want to participate in a meal train, assume that not everything people send will be something you love or even like. It's likely her family just has different standards/parameters for food. You say thank you, graciously, and then toss it. That's how meal trains go.

Thus thread reminds me of the recent thread on how everyone laments there's no village anymore, but parents today don't actually want the village. This is a perfect example. Someone prepared a meal for you (yes, they did, I don't care how subpart you think it was, that woman thought of, shopped for, and assembled a meal for your family) but you're mad because it's not good enough, not what you'd feed your family, not reflective of your values and social class.

Well that's your village. Take it or leave it. She doesn't work for you, she's just trying to help you out.

I've never had a bad meal from these things, but maybe that's because my favorite food is pizza and I will eat any pizza so if people ask I say pizza. I also rarely eat pizza under normal non-stressful situations so it always tastes good.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was part of a mom’s preschool group that made a meal train for me when I had my second child. So, granted, the person who signed up to bring this wasn’t my BFF of anything. So I give her a pass..

But I was sent “pizza pasta.” It was cooked noodled, some pepperoni, a jar of sauce, and bag of mozzarella dumped on top, all in an aluminium casserole dish. Plus box of generic frozen Texas toast garlic bread. Whole things was tossed. Yuck. If you are going to sign up for a meal train, don’t send bare minimum packaged stuff.

And this is why meal trains aren't realistic. Overwhelmed volunteers and recipients with champagne tastes.

Yep. What a snot.

As I've gotten older, I've become a bit more grossed out about other people's cooking. I realized at one point, I've seen too many gross things when my friends cook that I just can't. We're all well raised and college educated but a lot of people seem to know very little about food safety or are just straight out gross. Like the neighbor who expected us to tolerate her cats on the dinner table eating the cheese of the plate of appetizers she set out. She's a Georgetown grad with a big firm lawyer husband and a nice looking house from the outside but their house is gross.

Anonymous wrote:Anything that is raw and must be cooked. And probably also fish because it will stink up the microwave

This. Mom of premature twins. I had a crazy neighbor who put fish in everything. When I came home from the hospital with one of my kids, she sent over a plate of fish that smelled so bad it made both dh and I nauseaus. If I can smell the fish from across the street, you shouldn't be gifting it to anyone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When we had a new baby someone brought us raw salmon and some sort of side ingredients (this was a while ago and I wasn't really sleeping, so my memory on the details is fuzzy but maybe a bagged salad?) and said "Enjoy cooking!" Thankfully DH is a great cook and he prepared the meal, but he was irked.

One time my MIL’s friend and friend’s dd and 3 year old granddaughter came to see our infant twins. Not only did they not bring us anything, but the 3 year old was hungry, so they asked for a snack. They let’s her wander around our house while she ate a granola bar, dropping crumbs everywhere. I was dumbfounded.

You’re mad that a 3 year old got hungry at your house?

Of course not. I’m annoyed that they chose to visit with a hungry 3 year old, brought nothing, asked us for food, and made a mess. We had newborn preterm twins. If you aren’t going to be helpful, the least you can do is make your visit help-neutral.

Same here. I had premies and was stunned by my bil and his skeevy wife calling us on labor day to tell us they were on the way to our house since we had always hosted that day. We had been at the hospital with one infant the entire night before. We have no problem telling people to get lost.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When we had a new baby someone brought us raw salmon and some sort of side ingredients (this was a while ago and I wasn't really sleeping, so my memory on the details is fuzzy but maybe a bagged salad?) and said "Enjoy cooking!" Thankfully DH is a great cook and he prepared the meal, but he was irked.

One time my MIL’s friend and friend’s dd and 3 year old granddaughter came to see our infant twins. Not only did they not bring us anything, but the 3 year old was hungry, so they asked for a snack. They let’s her wander around our house while she ate a granola bar, dropping crumbs everywhere. I was dumbfounded.

You’re mad that a 3 year old got hungry at your house?

Not pp, but you're an ass.

No one has ever made/brought me a meal. I would eat anything!

This post is making me think of my mother, who passed a few years ago. I am one of 8 kids and whenever a new baby was arriving my mother would roast a turkey breast. As soon as we went into labor she would start cooking. It was great because you could make sandwiches and pick at it for days.