Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How often are your kids seeing their bf/gf?

Mine is 17 and they've only been dating a few months but don't really see each other much. Lots of texting and they usually hang out 1 day/week (sometimes for an hour or so after school).

Is this the norm?

It's just so different now. When I was dating in HS/college I def was with my Bf a lot more than that.

This is about what we are comfortable with and feel is appropriate. I see zero reason to get so serious so fast. Once per week is plenty outside of school. Academics, sports, other ECs, and her girl group friendships need to come first.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If a teen relationship appears too enmeshed, other than talking about it and encouraging other friendships and activities, what can as parent do that won't backfire?

More family weekend trips and out of town vacations. Make them get a job and/or volunteer hours; anywhere where the significant other is not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would introduce yourself by text to parents. Maybe pick a time you know they will be at your house and text to introduce yourself, tell them you understand xx is coming over and you wanted them to have your number in case they ever need it. That at least opens communication. My house rules at that age were they could hang out only when a parent was home, not in BR. They were often in the basement TV room and I’d pop down to do laundry and say hello periodically, but I left them alone plenty. I also suggest you invite significant other to dinner so you spend sometime with the family not just your DD alone.

do not do this. this is way weird.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How often are your kids seeing their bf/gf?

Mine is 17 and they've only been dating a few months but don't really see each other much. Lots of texting and they usually hang out 1 day/week (sometimes for an hour or so after school).

Is this the norm?

It's just so different now. When I was dating in HS/college I def was with my Bf a lot more than that.

This is about what we are comfortable with and feel is appropriate. I see zero reason to get so serious so fast. Once per week is plenty outside of school. Academics, sports, other ECs, and her girl group friendships need to come first.

They are far from "serious." But also seem to be moving VEEERRRRY slow (which is fine with me but I just wonder if this means they really "aren't that into each other.") We def aren't bringing him on vacations or family outings and we haven't met the parents (other than to say hello and put names to faces).

Anonymous wrote:I would introduce yourself by text to parents. Maybe pick a time you know they will be at your house and text to introduce yourself, tell them you understand xx is coming over and you wanted them to have your number in case they ever need it. That at least opens communication. My house rules at that age were they could hang out only when a parent was home, not in BR. They were often in the basement TV room and I’d pop down to do laundry and say hello periodically, but I left them alone plenty. I also suggest you invite significant other to dinner so you spend sometime with the family not just your DD alone.