Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be spending New Year’s Eve with my son’s girlfriend’s parents for the first time . They apparently do not drink (though are okay if their adult kids do). I enjoy wine with dinner, and to be honest would ideally have some wine on New Year’s Eve—especially in a socially charged situation—nothing excessive at all.

But, perhaps it is rude of me to bring wine, if they don’t drink? (No one under 21 will be present.) Thanks.

Bringing wine to a place where you know people are deliberately abstaining is excessive. If you can't go a night without it, even in "a socially charged situation" you may have a problem with alcohol use/dependence.

Spend a single sober night. You will survive. Unless, of course, you won't, in which case, you're already an alcoholic and will need supervised detox to deal with your DTs.

Seriously, though. The fact that the thought of being without booze for a single event is giving you this much stress indicates you have a problematic relationship to alcohol. There are all kinds of programs that can help you with this.

-7+ years sober (and I used to "sneak a flask" to all kinds of things I "enjoyed more w/o booze", so I get it)

Blah blah blah. It’s not just any night we’re talking about, folks. It’s NYE! Basically anyone who drinks has a glass of champagne on NYE. You’re acting like it’s a random Tuesday night in March. Get over yourself. Just because you’re an alcoholic doesn’t mean everyone is.

It's one night. There's nothing magical about a glass of alcohol on new year's. Plenty of people don't drink. If you can't be one of them, if you're so addicted that you have to bring booze somewhere you know it won't be, that's not about "enjoyment", it's about your addiction.

Fighting this hard for it, like it's some sort of sacred thing, represents a very flawed relationship to a food item. Do you go this hard for eggs on Easter? Goose on Christmas?

Sober up. If you can't, well, there's your problem

If someone really wants to bring pumpkin pie to Thanksgiving it doesn't make them an addict. Some people treat alcohol like food. It's just another item on the table to sample and not consumed as a drug. It doesn't have a hold on us as it apparently does for you.

Thank you.

Why are so many people using “need” interchangeably with “prefer?”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be spending New Year’s Eve with my son’s girlfriend’s parents for the first time . They apparently do not drink (though are okay if their adult kids do). I enjoy wine with dinner, and to be honest would ideally have some wine on New Year’s Eve—especially in a socially charged situation—nothing excessive at all.

But, perhaps it is rude of me to bring wine, if they don’t drink? (No one under 21 will be present.) Thanks.

Bringing wine to a place where you know people are deliberately abstaining is excessive. If you can't go a night without it, even in "a socially charged situation" you may have a problem with alcohol use/dependence.

Spend a single sober night. You will survive. Unless, of course, you won't, in which case, you're already an alcoholic and will need supervised detox to deal with your DTs.

Seriously, though. The fact that the thought of being without booze for a single event is giving you this much stress indicates you have a problematic relationship to alcohol. There are all kinds of programs that can help you with this.

-7+ years sober (and I used to "sneak a flask" to all kinds of things I "enjoyed more w/o booze", so I get it)

Blah blah blah. It’s not just any night we’re talking about, folks. It’s NYE! Basically anyone who drinks has a glass of champagne on NYE. You’re acting like it’s a random Tuesday night in March. Get over yourself. Just because you’re an alcoholic doesn’t mean everyone is.

It's one night. There's nothing magical about a glass of alcohol on new year's. Plenty of people don't drink. If you can't be one of them, if you're so addicted that you have to bring booze somewhere you know it won't be, that's not about "enjoyment", it's about your addiction.

Fighting this hard for it, like it's some sort of sacred thing, represents a very flawed relationship to a food item. Do you go this hard for eggs on Easter? Goose on Christmas?

Sober up. If you can't, well, there's your problem

If someone really wants to bring pumpkin pie to Thanksgiving it doesn't make them an addict. Some people treat alcohol like food. It's just another item on the table to sample and not consumed as a drug. It doesn't have a hold on us as it apparently does for you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be spending New Year’s Eve with my son’s girlfriend’s parents for the first time . They apparently do not drink (though are okay if their adult kids do). I enjoy wine with dinner, and to be honest would ideally have some wine on New Year’s Eve—especially in a socially charged situation—nothing excessive at all.

But, perhaps it is rude of me to bring wine, if they don’t drink? (No one under 21 will be present.) Thanks.

Bringing wine to a place where you know people are deliberately abstaining is excessive. If you can't go a night without it, even in "a socially charged situation" you may have a problem with alcohol use/dependence.

Spend a single sober night. You will survive. Unless, of course, you won't, in which case, you're already an alcoholic and will need supervised detox to deal with your DTs.

Seriously, though. The fact that the thought of being without booze for a single event is giving you this much stress indicates you have a problematic relationship to alcohol. There are all kinds of programs that can help you with this.

-7+ years sober (and I used to "sneak a flask" to all kinds of things I "enjoyed more w/o booze", so I get it)

Blah blah blah. It’s not just any night we’re talking about, folks. It’s NYE! Basically anyone who drinks has a glass of champagne on NYE. You’re acting like it’s a random Tuesday night in March. Get over yourself. Just because you’re an alcoholic doesn’t mean everyone is.

It's one night. There's nothing magical about a glass of alcohol on new year's. Plenty of people don't drink. If you can't be one of them, if you're so addicted that you have to bring booze somewhere you know it won't be, that's not about "enjoyment", it's about your addiction.

Fighting this hard for it, like it's some sort of sacred thing, represents a very flawed relationship to a food item. Do you go this hard for eggs on Easter? Goose on Christmas?

Sober up. If you can't, well, there's your problem

If someone really wants to bring pumpkin pie to Thanksgiving it doesn't make them an addict. Some people treat alcohol like food. It's just another item on the table to sample and not consumed as a drug. It doesn't have a hold on us as it apparently does for you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be spending New Year’s Eve with my son’s girlfriend’s parents for the first time . They apparently do not drink (though are okay if their adult kids do). I enjoy wine with dinner, and to be honest would ideally have some wine on New Year’s Eve—especially in a socially charged situation—nothing excessive at all.

But, perhaps it is rude of me to bring wine, if they don’t drink? (No one under 21 will be present.) Thanks.

Bringing wine to a place where you know people are deliberately abstaining is excessive. If you can't go a night without it, even in "a socially charged situation" you may have a problem with alcohol use/dependence.

Spend a single sober night. You will survive. Unless, of course, you won't, in which case, you're already an alcoholic and will need supervised detox to deal with your DTs.

Seriously, though. The fact that the thought of being without booze for a single event is giving you this much stress indicates you have a problematic relationship to alcohol. There are all kinds of programs that can help you with this.

-7+ years sober (and I used to "sneak a flask" to all kinds of things I "enjoyed more w/o booze", so I get it)

Blah blah blah. It’s not just any night we’re talking about, folks. It’s NYE! Basically anyone who drinks has a glass of champagne on NYE. You’re acting like it’s a random Tuesday night in March. Get over yourself. Just because you’re an alcoholic doesn’t mean everyone is.

It's one night. There's nothing magical about a glass of alcohol on new year's. Plenty of people don't drink. If you can't be one of them, if you're so addicted that you have to bring booze somewhere you know it won't be, that's not about "enjoyment", it's about your addiction.

Fighting this hard for it, like it's some sort of sacred thing, represents a very flawed relationship to a food item. Do you go this hard for eggs on Easter? Goose on Christmas?

Sober up. If you can't, well, there's your problem

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be spending New Year’s Eve with my son’s girlfriend’s parents for the first time . They apparently do not drink (though are okay if their adult kids do). I enjoy wine with dinner, and to be honest would ideally have some wine on New Year’s Eve—especially in a socially charged situation—nothing excessive at all.

But, perhaps it is rude of me to bring wine, if they don’t drink? (No one under 21 will be present.) Thanks.

Bringing wine to a place where you know people are deliberately abstaining is excessive. If you can't go a night without it, even in "a socially charged situation" you may have a problem with alcohol use/dependence.

Spend a single sober night. You will survive. Unless, of course, you won't, in which case, you're already an alcoholic and will need supervised detox to deal with your DTs.

Seriously, though. The fact that the thought of being without booze for a single event is giving you this much stress indicates you have a problematic relationship to alcohol. There are all kinds of programs that can help you with this.

-7+ years sober (and I used to "sneak a flask" to all kinds of things I "enjoyed more w/o booze", so I get it)

Blah blah blah. It’s not just any night we’re talking about, folks. It’s NYE! Basically anyone who drinks has a glass of champagne on NYE. You’re acting like it’s a random Tuesday night in March. Get over yourself. Just because you’re an alcoholic doesn’t mean everyone is.

It's one night. There's nothing magical about a glass of alcohol on new year's. Plenty of people don't drink. If you can't be one of them, if you're so addicted that you have to bring booze somewhere you know it won't be, that's not about "enjoyment", it's about your addiction.

Fighting this hard for it, like it's some sort of sacred thing, represents a very flawed relationship to a food item. Do you go this hard for eggs on Easter? Goose on Christmas?

Sober up. If you can't, well, there's your problem

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be spending New Year’s Eve with my son’s girlfriend’s parents for the first time . They apparently do not drink (though are okay if their adult kids do). I enjoy wine with dinner, and to be honest would ideally have some wine on New Year’s Eve—especially in a socially charged situation—nothing excessive at all.

But, perhaps it is rude of me to bring wine, if they don’t drink? (No one under 21 will be present.) Thanks.

Bringing wine to a place where you know people are deliberately abstaining is excessive. If you can't go a night without it, even in "a socially charged situation" you may have a problem with alcohol use/dependence.

Spend a single sober night. You will survive. Unless, of course, you won't, in which case, you're already an alcoholic and will need supervised detox to deal with your DTs.

Seriously, though. The fact that the thought of being without booze for a single event is giving you this much stress indicates you have a problematic relationship to alcohol. There are all kinds of programs that can help you with this.

-7+ years sober (and I used to "sneak a flask" to all kinds of things I "enjoyed more w/o booze", so I get it)

Blah blah blah. It’s not just any night we’re talking about, folks. It’s NYE! Basically anyone who drinks has a glass of champagne on NYE. You’re acting like it’s a random Tuesday night in March. Get over yourself. Just because you’re an alcoholic doesn’t mean everyone is.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes and its strange to me you can't go one night without it...hhhmmm

It's New Year's Eve though. It's traditional to have a drink that night. I'm the PP who doesn't drink but it wouldn't bother me if someone brought it to my home. Much better than expecting me to provide it because I wouldn't know what to get. I'm not abstaining due to health reasons or sobriety. I just don't care for it. Since these people don't care if their adult child drinks, I assume they are the same way, but since it is so fraught, maybe OP should check with their DC. I feel like with everyone I know it would be absolutely fine.

Not for everyone! Consider that.

Obviously, since the post you're quoting is from a non-drinker. Wanting a drink on NYE doesn't make the OPs alcoholic. That's a night where people who only drink once or twice a year will have one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That this is even a concern for you suggests that alcohol is playing too large a role in your life.

Oh stop it’s New Year’s Eve. Having a glass of champagne or similar is standard. Regular night in February, sure id completely agree this wouldn’t even be a question. But a holiday that typically features a specific alcoholic beverage?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be spending New Year’s Eve with my son’s girlfriend’s parents for the first time . They apparently do not drink (though are okay if their adult kids do). I enjoy wine with dinner, and to be honest would ideally have some wine on New Year’s Eve—especially in a socially charged situation—nothing excessive at all.

But, perhaps it is rude of me to bring wine, if they don’t drink? (No one under 21 will be present.) Thanks.

Bringing wine to a place where you know people are deliberately abstaining is excessive. If you can't go a night without it, even in "a socially charged situation" you may have a problem with alcohol use/dependence.

Spend a single sober night. You will survive. Unless, of course, you won't, in which case, you're already an alcoholic and will need supervised detox to deal with your DTs.

Seriously, though. The fact that the thought of being without booze for a single event is giving you this much stress indicates you have a problematic relationship to alcohol. There are all kinds of programs that can help you with this.

-7+ years sober (and I used to "sneak a flask" to all kinds of things I "enjoyed more w/o booze", so I get it)

Anonymous wrote:I am from a non-drinking family and my parents would absolutely want a guest to fill comfortable and if that includes alcohol so be it. Some of my other relatives feel differently. Your initial posts suggests the GF’s parents are more like mine.

I do think it’s weird to not be able to abstain for one meal, but again, I grew up with no alcohol being the norm so none of the reasons people say they “need” resonate with me.

Curious though - why are you polling stranger and not asking your son his thoughts.