Musical instrument, sport (swimming), scout, and church.

What’s worth it to us?
- family travel, we travel several weeks in the year or months a summer to the mountains and beach abs prioritize visiting family while they are alive
- sports, been great for socialization and physical activity
- getting to know other families and being involved in the community during the elementary years, we want them to feel like they know the other kids well that’s they are going to school with so we do a lot of family things or travel, carpools etc
- emphasis on EQ and relationships, life skills like finance and business
- volunteer work
- faith, attending church and having a faith based community

Anonymous wrote:Swimming lessons mandatory until proficient- very important life skill.

Learn one musical instrument. Usually no need to start until the mid elementary years.

Try out several rec level team sports (whatever the kid seems interested in) but never more than one at a time. Don’t sacrifice family time for this, and don’t put your kid on any travel teams before 5th grade or so. They can specialize and/or move to travel teams in middle school. Usually the sports picture (interest level, enjoyment, talent level etc) becomes much clearer by then.

A little golf or tennis in the summer is helpful- lifelong sports. . Good to have some early exposure in case they become interested later on.

IMO academic enrichment is not necessary in elementary school unless the teacher indicates a problem area. That said- keep an eye out for after school academic clubs that might interest your kid.

+1 this is my parenting approach too

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have older kids or have been through the elementary years already, what activities, sports, or outside enrichment have been truly worth it, and why?

There is so much my child is interested in and it’s not reasonable to do it all. STEM class, math, language school, piano, nature sessions, Zoom class, multiple sports leagues, sports camps.

I wonder when I look back several years from now if I will wish I had done it differently and pushed focus on just one or two things year after year. Right now I’m just following enthusiastic child’s changing interests and doing as much as we can fit in without going crazy with driving or cutting into sleep and family time.

STEM class - nonsense, skipt it
math - if the kids is smart, do AOPS, otherwise skip
language school - do it online with a tutor, it's cheaper and easier
piano - big commitment, do it only if you they are gonna do it long term, start young
nature sessions - sounds like nonsense
zoom class - ???
sports - no idea, but i assume it's similar to music. you need to start early and stick to a single sport; otherwise it will eat a lot of resources and won't go anywhere

I disagree, as an adult having a basic foundation in a lot of sports is really helpful. I know the basics and can comfortably jump into casual tennis, golf, skiing, swimming, volleyball, soccer, softball, basketball etc. That makes rec/social engagement really easy.

There is no one right schedule, because every kid and every family is different. We have one with ADHD, and while we started with "only 1-2 activities" at a time, that child had energy to burn, and if they didn't, everyone around them (family, teachers, classmates) were miserable. So that kid had a physical activity nearly every day. Another child needed more down time/alone time, so they had fewer.

Essentially, we allowed each child what they needed. Both excelled in school, in various magnet programs, both went to great colleges for undergrad, even with some merit aid. Both visit friends from HS when home on break and have made good friends at college as well.

We are tremendously proud of both of them, and it didn't matter that one participated in more activities than the other - both got what they needed to be successful and happy

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Early elementary one activity per season, max.

We value and prioritize unstructured play time outside of school and time outside in addition to having a fairly flexible schedule for whatever we want to do.

One activity at a time? I would like to know what your kid’s week looked like at 2nd- 4th grade! I don’t know anyone who only does even just 1 sport at a time.

Mine is:

Mon: free
Tue: piano lesson
Wed: sport practice or game
Thu: free
Fri:free
Sat: language class
Sat or Sun: sometimes a sport game

But no before care or aftercare, so at school 8-3pm and he gets picked up right away for sport or music.

That’s an easy schedule.

That is my point. And it’s 4 activities. I can’t see people doing just 1 activity per semester with all the enrichment and optimization going on.

Some activities have a higher commitment. We are doing one sport at a time for my son because more than one was too much. He’s 8 but he has 3 practices a week then 3-5 games a weekend. He plays football, lacrosse, tennis and basketball but we only do one at a time. The next sport is a rec league that has 1 practice and 1 game a week but when it’s a slower period he can play with friends. He also does a Christian peer group.

Anonymous wrote:IMO, things that have been worth it:
—any active activity my kids have been willing to do. I have seen increased coordination and confidence come from practicing week after week. This includes things like bike riding and kicking a ball with parents
—heritage language school. It’s important to us as parents, so worth the schlep.
—anything a kid is truly interested in.

Things that have not been worth it for my family:
—anything I think sounds fun but that the kid isn’t interested in.

I like the way you’ve put this.

More specifically, for our family, learning to read, to swim, another language, an instrument, and to “do” for themselves (cooking , cleaning, chores) were all worthwhile. Being active (a sport, dance, hiking, biking) was and continues to be something to make time for and, if necessary, spend a reasonable amount of) money on. The other big one was to be home for dinner as a family. That one didn’t fall til late in HS but most of us made a big effort to try to make dinner whenever possible. Oh, and, a set…and early bedtime. The kids barked….but they thank us now. Being well rested and well fed prevents so many issues.

Swimming, for safety.
Gymnastics is an excellent foundation for most other sports.
With my youngest, I'm skipping music lessons, tutors, and extra academic classes and committing to reading an hour a day, working through Beast Academy at a gentle pace, or helping with schoolwork. I did too much running around with an older sibling and feel like I can streamline things with a younger sibling now that I have a better grasp.

Making sure kids are strong swimmers is important to us - for safety reasons. We are not into any competitive sports, but the kids took years of swimming lessons and are capable swimmers who are unlikely to drown.

Music
Math
Sports

Music is a gift for its own sake but also because it supports the development of math brain.

Math because our kids are gifted and schools did not provide enough challenge. RSM is the best, although Beast Math/AOPs is good, too. Don’t do drill and kill like Mathnasium.

In fact anything rote at this age will kill love of learning.

Sports because being active is important for healthy, socialization, and confidence. Boys socialize and interact primarily through sports. Girls who play sports are more confident and have better self-images, including body image.

Impact sports help kids grow sturdier brains, may be correlated with greater height. Exercise reduces stress.

You can’t start many sports after the elementary years unless the kid is very athletically talented. Soccer, hockey, basketball, lacrosse, tennis needs to start young, 4, 5,:6. Baseball you can start up to about age 12, swimming & volleyball, too. Football, for a skill position you need to start young, for lineman positions can start anytime if they’re decently athletic. Track, too.

Anonymous wrote:DS (3rd grder in the fall)
Mon to Fri 8:30am to 5-6pm at school

Mon- PE ends at 6:30pm
Tue- online language class after dinner
Wed- soccer practice ends at 7:30pm
Thur- online languahe class after dinner
Fri- free
Sat- soccer game, swim class
Sun- swim class

DD (will be kindergartener)
Mon- free
Tue- free
Wed- free
Thur- PE ends at 6pm
Fri- free
Sat- gynmastic class
Sun- swim class

She tags along and go to all soccer practice/game. Both kids want to do ice skating & basketball, and I CANNOT add that into our schedule.

Pp here. DD go to beforecare/aftercare as well. IF I have flexible work hours & work remote, I would want to give up aftercare option, and drop them off to attend interesting classes during aftercare hours.

DS (3rd grder in the fall)
Mon to Fri 8:30am to 5-6pm at school

Mon- PE ends at 6:30pm
Tue- online language class after dinner
Wed- soccer practice ends at 7:30pm
Thur- online languahe class after dinner
Fri- free
Sat- soccer game, swim class
Sun- swim class

DD (will be kindergartener)
Mon- free
Tue- free
Wed- free
Thur- PE ends at 6pm
Fri- free
Sat- gynmastic class
Sun- swim class

She tags along and go to all soccer practice/game. Both kids want to do ice skating & basketball, and I CANNOT add that into our schedule.

Anonymous wrote:Early elementary one activity per season, max.

We value and prioritize unstructured play time outside of school and time outside in addition to having a fairly flexible schedule for whatever we want to do.

We did/do 2 activities at a time in early ES. 1 sport, 1 non-sport. Non-sport our kids' chose was always an instrument (then they were mad they could do Girl Scouts), and sport varied. We have 3 kids and the schedule has been manageable, they have free time, they all have done fine in school, and they learned hobbies. Helped that I work only during the school day so they didn't have to do before or after care and I have some summer flexibility.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Healthy and skinny are not the same things! People can be, and often are, thin and unhealthy. People can be, and often are, thick and healthy.

Exercise is good for everyone's health. Full stop. The goal isn't to be slim, it's to enjoy a long life.

Shut up about full stop

DP. You don’t like the wording and articulate that rudely, but the PP’s concept is accurate.

pp isn’t wrong that exercise is important for everyone but “full stop” is THE most annoying phrase ever

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Healthy and skinny are not the same things! People can be, and often are, thin and unhealthy. People can be, and often are, thick and healthy.

Exercise is good for everyone's health. Full stop. The goal isn't to be slim, it's to enjoy a long life.

Shut up about full stop

DP. You don’t like the wording and articulate that rudely, but the PP’s concept is accurate.