Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We've had luck with baseball. It's torture when your kid isn't doing well because everyone sees it but other parents generally supportive because every kid goes through a rough spell.

I'd love to hear about a baseball program that isn't toxic. My kid loved playing so much... for awhile. But I've never seen such bad behavior from parents. Then again, my kid played in NWLL where they literally needed a federal lawsuit to untangle the bad parenting behavior.

Think about the structure. First you have age bands, but the good kids will usually play up. Once the kid is old enough for the majors, you have coaches whose primary goal is making sure their kid makes all stars because that's when the real season starts. Parents know this and the dads with time who really care volunteer. That leads to the absurdity of a little league team with more bench coaches than a professional team each of whom only cares about making sure their kid is in a position to show well. The poor kid whose parents can't coach is playing corner outfield and batting 8th assuming they even get many at bats. It's the only sport I can think of were the pay to play travel leagues are significantly less toxic than the rec leagues

Anonymous wrote:We've had luck with baseball. It's torture when your kid isn't doing well because everyone sees it but other parents generally supportive because every kid goes through a rough spell.

I'd love to hear about a baseball program that isn't toxic. My kid loved playing so much... for awhile. But I've never seen such bad behavior from parents. Then again, my kid played in NWLL where they literally needed a federal lawsuit to untangle the bad parenting behavior.

Surfing and frisbee?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Theater

totally. that's an activity where the kids are toxic.

Especially if it’s a school production with kids responsible for casting. That makes a cattle call soccer or basketball tryout seem downright friendly

Squash. Great kids and parent community. Excellent programs at the St. James in Springfield or Squash on Fire in DC.

Best looking I would say field hockey

We've had luck with baseball. It's torture when your kid isn't doing well because everyone sees it but other parents generally supportive because every kid goes through a rough spell.

Anonymous wrote:Rec softball has been great. Sport draws kids with involved fathers, which is a plus. I have heard you do sometimes get fathers who Care Too Much, but less so than baseball and in any case I'd expect those to go travel. (To be fair, I haven't actually run into any of that variety myself; maybe all levels of softball are sweetness and light, but I wouldn't bet on it.)

+1 for rec softball, but I have heard enough terrible things about travel softball teams to know you pick the coach/organization with care. Actually you pick the rec organization with care too. Friend told me her recreational organization is imploding because the guy in charge is just done.

Cocky cocky

anything that doesn't lead to college admission

Anonymous wrote:Theater

totally. that's an activity where the kids are toxic.

Theater

Rugby.

Most parents don't know what's going on and so have to keep their mouth shut because they can't figure out what is happening and if their kid did something wrong.

Of the parents who do know what's going on, half are foreign expats who come from very different youth sports cultures and the other half are Americans who played rugby in college, where it is a club sport and basically consists of benders that are occasionally paused so they can play a game. Those types tend to come to games looking for a party, not a fight.

Baseball is BY FAR the most toxic. It's genuinely upsetting.

Anonymous wrote:Wrestling is a great character-building sport for kids because it’s just you and your opponent- no teammates or equipment to hid behind. My son has wrestled some very tough girls as an 8 year-old. Most wrestling parents are really supportive and cheer on all the kids because it’s so clear how much courage it takes to just get on the mat by yourself.

Uh, parents are psycho. All of my friends whose kids wrestle talk about regularly witnessing fights and parents screaming at their kids to hurt other kids. Kids wearing MAGA onesies... and the whole sport basically consists of giving small kids eating disorders and then making them fight in front of a couple hundred angry adults.

Rec softball has been great. Sport draws kids with involved fathers, which is a plus. I have heard you do sometimes get fathers who Care Too Much, but less so than baseball and in any case I'd expect those to go travel. (To be fair, I haven't actually run into any of that variety myself; maybe all levels of softball are sweetness and light, but I wouldn't bet on it.)