I mean, it's rec. Unless the rules specifically say how much time a person can play, I would suggest your daughter start advocating for herself and beyond that just suck it up. Honestly, you seem WAY invested in this in a way that is probably not healthy for your daughter to witness. I certainly hope you haven't said the bit out loud about the coaches daughter being overweight and slow within your DD's earshot, that's an incredibly insensitive and obnoxious to say about an 11-year-old girl. Even on a message board. And even if you think someone was asking for that kind of description, it's distasteful. Maybe next year you should insist on coaching instead of checking a box then you can be happy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP isn't sure how height is relevant to basketball? LOL.

Not irrelevant to basketball -- irrelevant to the decision of how much or how little playing time I kid should get in a recreational league.

This is a little contradictory. You said that your daughter is very good. The coaches daughter is not so good.

But now you’re saying it’s a rec team and everyone should get equal time no matter the skill level. I agree with this. That’s what most rec teams do.

My daughter only started at age 11. She went into rec and got equal time even though she didn’t contribute much. She’s 12 now and 5’8” and hasn’t started puberty yet. Certain body types and height help. She’s going to full time basketball camp for four weeks to catch up.

Rec teams aren’t about who’s the better player.

So what you would suggest in this situation? The coach is giving her daughter a ton of minutes compared to some other kids. Is that OK in a rec league? How would you address this situation? Or would you just tell your daughter to grin and bear it?

Your daughter is 11, right? She advocates for herself. "Hey coach, I'm wondering if I can get a few more minutes playing time this game than last game." Have you never seen a pack of tween girls clustered around a coach asking to be deployed in a game situation they way they want? Girls do this all the time.

This makes sense to me. I've read other posts that say that a player in this position should silently accept the situation, but that seems like a depressing option, and one that could make a kid feel like it is OK and normal for other people to treat them badly.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP isn't sure how height is relevant to basketball? LOL.

Not irrelevant to basketball -- irrelevant to the decision of how much or how little playing time I kid should get in a recreational league.

This is a little contradictory. You said that your daughter is very good. The coaches daughter is not so good.

But now you’re saying it’s a rec team and everyone should get equal time no matter the skill level. I agree with this. That’s what most rec teams do.

My daughter only started at age 11. She went into rec and got equal time even though she didn’t contribute much. She’s 12 now and 5’8” and hasn’t started puberty yet. Certain body types and height help. She’s going to full time basketball camp for four weeks to catch up.

Rec teams aren’t about who’s the better player.

So what you would suggest in this situation? The coach is giving her daughter a ton of minutes compared to some other kids. Is that OK in a rec league? How would you address this situation? Or would you just tell your daughter to grin and bear it?

Your daughter is 11, right? She advocates for herself. "Hey coach, I'm wondering if I can get a few more minutes playing time this game than last game." Have you never seen a pack of tween girls clustered around a coach asking to be deployed in a game situation they way they want? Girls do this all the time.