Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would push back citing the policy of the other senior member. Say “I have a family conflict that will pull me away from 8-8:40 every morning.” Or something.
How lame and performative of them btw. Yuck.
Don't say "family" conflict if you are a woman. It just feeds a stereotype. Leave it at, "I have a conflict, but am available after 8:45," or something like that.
Great point. I think a lot of women (including myself) have a tendency to over explain because we feel guilty for balancing kids and career. But we do not owe our employer an expectation for what we do during non work hours.
I want to add on to the above. You also do not owe your employer an explanation for what you are doing during business hours if you have the flexibility to take leave for personal reasons as needed. Do not schedule your PTO as a “parent teacher conference” or your “annual wellness exam”. It’s just personal appt from 10am-Noon.
For the naysayers - no, this doesn’t work in every position (eg shitftwork where hours can’t be flexed). But most posters on DCUM are desk workers and can take PTO during the day for personal reasons.
Anonymous wrote:I would push back citing the policy of the other senior member. Say “I have a family conflict that will pull me away from 8-8:40 every morning.” Or something.
How lame and performative of them btw. Yuck.
Anonymous wrote:I would push back citing the policy of the other senior member. Say “I have a family conflict that will pull me away from 8-8:40 every morning.” Or something.
How lame and performative of them btw. Yuck.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I am not fine, as it turns out. He called my boss (who is in Denver) at 7:45 EDT and laid into him, saying I was being "uncooperative." Boss told him to pound sand, but this manager is now furious with me and already working up to chain to let anyone within earshot know how useless I am.
Dollars to donuts this is not the first time and won't be the last time this manager is being a jerk. You're in thr right and your supervisor has your back. You'll be fine, especially since 70k isn't enough to get rid of you. If it goes to HR, ask them to renegotiate your salary to have you on call beyond an 8 hour work day.
Anonymous wrote:I would push back citing the policy of the other senior member. Say “I have a family conflict that will pull me away from 8-8:40 every morning.” Or something.
How lame and performative of them btw. Yuck.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would push back citing the policy of the other senior member. Say “I have a family conflict that will pull me away from 8-8:40 every morning.” Or something.
How lame and performative of them btw. Yuck.
Don't say "family" conflict if you are a woman. It just feeds a stereotype. Leave it at, "I have a conflict, but am available after 8:45," or something like that.
Great point. I think a lot of women (including myself) have a tendency to over explain because we feel guilty for balancing kids and career. But we do not owe our employer an expectation for what we do during non work hours.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Is this the kind of job you have to cancel vacation for, like a law firm? If not, then tell them you have prescheduled commitments and you cannot make that time. No ifs, ands or buts. If it was important enough that you be there, they should have asked you. If you’d been on vacation they’d have rescheduled or found a sub, right? So tell them that.
If it’s a job where you must cancel vacation to accommodate them, then that sucks and I’m sorry. Been there. Left for a more family friendly place. In the meantime call the camp and ask if they have a carpool list. Maybe you can make an arrangement with another parent or outright pay them.
The company is totally cool with vacation and stepping out and whatever. This particular individual, who again, I do not report to, is not. Kind of tempted to just call in sick tomorrow.
OP, you are causing the problem here by not declining the meeting. It's not great that you left it until the night before, but tell your boss you can't make it to the meeting. Say you will be happy to reschedule later in the same day, or they can find someone else to present the material which you are happy to provide.
I bet the other person has some summer commitment they don't want impinged by a normal meeting time. Too bad for them.
The invitation was only sent at 1 pm today. I DID decline the meeting and propose a new time this afternoon.