Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is terrible for the environment. Flying so much every week. How entitled you must be!

+1, and people jeering this seem not to realize that many of OP's bosses, peers, etc will think the same thing.
At best she will be the crazy one with the wild commute that makes her more likely to quit (ie, a risk to promote) but many will also find it morally wrong. It will harm her advancement.

Lol no. 😆😆😆

I realize you’ve never worked professionally in your life, so you have a completely fantasy-based view of the workplace but let me tell you that outside of the semi-abusive work environment of a few environmental NGOs based in San Francisco, commuting by plane will not hurt career advancement. Actually you are more likely to hear a “huh, bet you save a lot on housing costs” and then people will forget.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can’t afford to live in socal on those salaries, especially with kids. Move to Fresno and commute.

Op here. What if I find a job in SoCal? Is a combined HHI of 480k enough do you think? With 2 kids?

of course! especially if your kids take advantage of the UC system

Op here….i am dumb and my kids are very little. Are you being sarcastic or how does this work?

Clearly I have a lot to learn!!

The UC system is very good and much less expensive than a lot of other colleges.

California is great. You only have to pay for 12 years of private school but have a great discount on good colleges.

🙄🙄

DCUM takes on life in California are always so looney-tunes.

I’m from California. All my relatives pay for private.

There are lots of great public school districts in California…

I mean some are better than others, but Great Schools is only comparing within states.

For the most part, the only public schools that are good are the $$$$ real estate like Palo Alto and Newport Beach. Or maybe some magnets. Overall it’s pretty grim for middle class parents like OP

You are trolling at this point. In no way does $500k/year make you middle class, even in California. And of course there are many excellent public schools in California that are outside of Palo Alto and Newport Beach. You sound so DC provincial. It’s embarrassing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can’t afford to live in socal on those salaries, especially with kids. Move to Fresno and commute.

Op here. What if I find a job in SoCal? Is a combined HHI of 480k enough do you think? With 2 kids?

of course! especially if your kids take advantage of the UC system

Op here….i am dumb and my kids are very little. Are you being sarcastic or how does this work?

Clearly I have a lot to learn!!

The UC system is very good and much less expensive than a lot of other colleges.

California is great. You only have to pay for 12 years of private school but have a great discount on good colleges.

🙄🙄

DCUM takes on life in California are always so looney-tunes.

I’m from California. All my relatives pay for private.

🙄🙄

Right. Because your relatives represent the entire state. Did moving to DC make you lose your ability to understand statistics or something?

Curious why the one of you with the offer in SoCal didn't accept, and the other double down on job search efforts in that area? The odds of you simultaneously being offered dream jobs in dream location seems low, no?

Op here. Thank you for all the replies. We have scrapped the plan (well, not that it was ever really a full fledged plan-we were trying to see if it could work).

We are going to keep looking/negotiating.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s wrong with Northern California?

Op here. We lived there before and it’s just not our cup of tea. The weather is too cool, the people are so smug and career obsessed, and the beaches suck.

I get it. We went to college in San Diego and moved to Northern California for grad school. Agree with your asssessment. DH got a job in LA and I commuted for a while from the Bay Area to LA. That got old fast. I suggest you make LA your home base and you commute until you find an LA job. I recommend Playa Vista, which is a great planned community near the beach and LAX.

Northern California is BIG. It’s not entirely made up of San Jose and SF. Of course beaches are warmer in the San Diego area. But there are many places in Northern California where people are normal.

Agreed. For Northern California I would look at the East Bay like San Ramon, or Sacramento suburbs.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s wrong with Northern California?

Op here. We lived there before and it’s just not our cup of tea. The weather is too cool, the people are so smug and career obsessed, and the beaches suck.

I get it. We went to college in San Diego and moved to Northern California for grad school. Agree with your asssessment. DH got a job in LA and I commuted for a while from the Bay Area to LA. That got old fast. I suggest you make LA your home base and you commute until you find an LA job. I recommend Playa Vista, which is a great planned community near the beach and LAX.

Northern California is BIG. It’s not entirely made up of San Jose and SF. Of course beaches are warmer in the San Diego area. But there are many places in Northern California where people are normal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can’t afford to live in socal on those salaries, especially with kids. Move to Fresno and commute.

Op here. What if I find a job in SoCal? Is a combined HHI of 480k enough do you think? With 2 kids?

of course! especially if your kids take advantage of the UC system

Op here….i am dumb and my kids are very little. Are you being sarcastic or how does this work?

Clearly I have a lot to learn!!

The UC system is very good and much less expensive than a lot of other colleges.

California is great. You only have to pay for 12 years of private school but have a great discount on good colleges.

🙄🙄

DCUM takes on life in California are always so looney-tunes.

I’m from California. All my relatives pay for private.

There are lots of great public school districts in California…

I mean some are better than others, but Great Schools is only comparing within states.

For the most part, the only public schools that are good are the $$$$ real estate like Palo Alto and Newport Beach. Or maybe some magnets. Overall it’s pretty grim for middle class parents like OP

that’s absurd. I swear people on DCUM are totally mentally deranged about public schools.

West coaster, absolutely would not move to SoCal. NOPE.

Terrible public schools
High taxes
Lots of crime

I would encourage you to research Orange County. Irvine has a great school system and is so close to Orange County airport. Traffic in LA is horrible. And unless you plan to go private school, public is not that great unless you live in one of the few school districts that are decent.

Anonymous wrote:This is terrible for the environment. Flying so much every week. How entitled you must be!

+1, and people jeering this seem not to realize that many of OP's bosses, peers, etc will think the same thing.
At best she will be the crazy one with the wild commute that makes her more likely to quit (ie, a risk to promote) but many will also find it morally wrong. It will harm her advancement.

I would live near the Burbank airport, which is the best airport in the entire world. Easy parking, small, many flights a day to SJ on Sourthwest. When I say near I mean Burbank, Glendale, Pasadena, Montrose, La Cresenta (excellent schools btw), etc. Living in SD or even orange county/Irving/Rancho Palos Verdes you both will hate your life. If you will be gone when your husband needs to commute he just needs to be closer to the office unless you are hiring help. Your salaries are good, but you will be spending a fortune on housing, flights, parking, hotels etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can’t afford to live in socal on those salaries, especially with kids. Move to Fresno and commute.

Op here. What if I find a job in SoCal? Is a combined HHI of 480k enough do you think? With 2 kids?

of course! especially if your kids take advantage of the UC system

Op here….i am dumb and my kids are very little. Are you being sarcastic or how does this work?

Clearly I have a lot to learn!!

The UC system is very good and much less expensive than a lot of other colleges.

California is great. You only have to pay for 12 years of private school but have a great discount on good colleges.

🙄🙄

DCUM takes on life in California are always so looney-tunes.

I’m from California. All my relatives pay for private.

There are lots of great public school districts in California…

We lived in CA for about five years in a wealthy community and the schools were terribly underfunded despite crazy taxes as the money goes up to the state and then gets filtered down through levels of bureaucracy. Our ES had good teachers but it was embarrassing how money had to be raised to afford things like paper for the copiers and basic art supplies. We were about to send our kids to private but we had the opportunity to move to the north shore of Chicago which has wonderful public schools. Lower COL, lower taxes but very cold winters but it was worth it.

Good luck! With much higher housing prices, ridiculous taxes and commuting costs you’d likely need to double your current salary to make it worthwhile. After a couple of months of two days in SJ and all its hassle you will wonder why did we ever do this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can’t afford to live in socal on those salaries, especially with kids. Move to Fresno and commute.

Op here. What if I find a job in SoCal? Is a combined HHI of 480k enough do you think? With 2 kids?

of course! especially if your kids take advantage of the UC system

Op here….i am dumb and my kids are very little. Are you being sarcastic or how does this work?

Clearly I have a lot to learn!!

The UC system is very good and much less expensive than a lot of other colleges.

California is great. You only have to pay for 12 years of private school but have a great discount on good colleges.

🙄🙄

DCUM takes on life in California are always so looney-tunes.

I’m from California. All my relatives pay for private.

There are lots of great public school districts in California…

I mean some are better than others, but Great Schools is only comparing within states.

For the most part, the only public schools that are good are the $$$$ real estate like Palo Alto and Newport Beach. Or maybe some magnets. Overall it’s pretty grim for middle class parents like OP