Anonymous wrote:The "I haven't looked at my phone for the last 5 hours while sitting in a pub" line is absolute horsesh*t and would make me suspicious as hell.

It's 2024. Literally NO ONE goes 5 hours during the day and doesn't glance at their phone. And before any SKIF nerd pedant wants to chime in, OP has already stated he is at a pub drinking.

I am a mid 40s woman. I regularly do not look at my phone for 7 hours all the time. If I am out, I don’t look at it at all. This past weekend, I did not look at it for 12 hours. 5 hours is not that long at all.

I spend a week in Europe every year for work. I am often out late, midnight or past, and days are intense too. I somehow manage to send a text before bed and usually call. It’s very easy. I’m in bed, about to sleep, it’s dinner time at home and I can usually manage a quick hello . I know my spouse is holding down the fort while I’m out in the town (yes it’s exhausting but also fun) so it’s common courtesy. I get why op is miffed. This was how they also did things until suddenly it was too difficult to text after being out drinking all night.

If it were a once a year conference, I’d say you were out of line for expecting a call every night. But this is a frequent thing and you have things to discuss, so I would definitely be pissed. My DH travels for work a few times a year and doesn’t generally call, except a quick FaceTime with the kids when the timing works out. Our kids are younger and there are lots of moving parts and things we have to plan together. If my DH is at a conference and there’s a reception or whatever, that’s fine and I would plan to talk another time/day or wait till he gets back. But if he is just chilling at a pub while I am trying to plan out the kids dentist appointments and figuring out carpool schedules for the upcoming weeks and when he can work from home for an appliance repair we need etc, yeah I will need him to call me back. Or at the very least respond to texts!

My DH travels a lot. In no way is he having an affair, but he's usually silent while gone. Maybe a text every other day. His work doesn't give him an international phone and he doesn't always have wifi/ won't pay for it at the hotel since he's rarely there. Asia is the worst because the times are so opposite ours. Once he went 3 weeks with ZERO contact while he was in Africa. That was a wtf from me though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did not read the thread and wonder if this is a troll given we have ppl who post "where is my husband" rather often.

That said, when I work travel, I treat it as a personal vacation and just focus on work. I find it really hard to "do" emotional parenting work while away. When called, I do answer, but I don't reach out and my family rarely reaches out to me.
Kids are 13 and 10. Spouse is 45.

Wow. How convenient for you.

I hope you compensate her for granting her the vacation from responsibility.

Anonymous wrote:I did not read the thread and wonder if this is a troll given we have ppl who post "where is my husband" rather often.

. . . 45.

I’ve noticed the troll(s) who write fictional troll-posts here simply to trash men.

They appear fairly consistently. Some person (or group of people) have major psychological issues, which are not being effectively addressed by their therapists.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is crazy. I have traveled for work regularly for 20 years and I have rarely missed calling home, and if I don’t call, I always always text.

I doubt he’s with a woman because he’d probably be covering his tracks but he could actually be excessively drinking, which is just as serious an issue.

Only on DCUM is having an affair roughly equivalent offense to drinking when on a work trip.

Anonymous wrote:Above poster you are definitely not a mom. Get it together.

Ikr. That could be my DH.

Anonymous wrote:I did not read the thread and wonder if this is a troll given we have ppl who post "where is my husband" rather often.

That said, when I work travel, I treat it as a personal vacation and just focus on work. I find it really hard to "do" emotional parenting work while away. When called, I do answer, but I don't reach out and my family rarely reaches out to me.
Kids are 13 and 10. Spouse is 45.

Wow. How convenient for you.

Above poster you are definitely not a mom. Get it together.

oh, just posted and have to say...I couldn't deal with a time-change and manage to call at a particular time while working. My brain hurts just htinking about it.

I did not read the thread and wonder if this is a troll given we have ppl who post "where is my husband" rather often.

That said, when I work travel, I treat it as a personal vacation and just focus on work. I find it really hard to "do" emotional parenting work while away. When called, I do answer, but I don't reach out and my family rarely reaches out to me.
Kids are 13 and 10. Spouse is 45.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:*3 seconds needed to pop off an 8 word text.

You are still missing the point. Nobody is saying you can’t send a pathetic 8 word text that you are drinking. The rest of us are talking about what it takes to make the connection OP wants:

Nope, but keep digging. You have no idea what OP wants.

Anonymous wrote:*3 seconds needed to pop off an 8 word text.

You are still missing the point. Nobody is saying you can’t send a pathetic 8 word text that you are drinking. The rest of us are talking about what it takes to make the connection OP wants:

*3 seconds needed to pop off an 8 word text.