Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don't have to go to church to have a relationship with God. God is everywhere. You can talk to God from anywhere in the world you may be.

It’s this. My parents forced us to go until we left for college but the times were flexible. There was a Saturday mass and many on Sunday to pick from so I don’t ever remember missing anything. None of us went during college. As adults 2/3 of us do not belong to a church or go to services of any kind. I have one sister who goes weekly with her entire family but switched religions and is no longer Catholic.

Do you think you would belong to a church now if your parents didn't force you when you were young?

No. We are a huge sports family and sports dominate the weekends. We enjoy this. I never got anything out of going to services and never felt the need to belong to a specific church. Maybe I would have tried joining one if I didn’t have my upbringing but wouldn’t have stayed. Organized religion isn’t for me.

I’m not anti religion at all. We believe in God and one of my children attends a Christian college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not threatened by those who hate Christians and the comments intended to insult me dont bother me. All Christians are accustomed to some level of persecution. This question was not for you and I respect that you choose to raise your family is different from mine.

I think I have a way forward so DC may continue sports. I'll discuss with DH and DC. Thank you everyone.

Oh wow, really? The good ole victim mentality again?

No wonder there's so many "haters" when christians say sh*t like this

Hilarious. Far more people are persecuted BY Christians.

Op, I still feel resentful as an adult for the activities my mom made me miss to attend church. It certainly did not make me a regular church goer as an adult either.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Forced religion is insane to me.

Organizing a whole family’s life around sports is insane to me.

Forcing children to miss physical activity so you can physically be in a place when god is [supposed to be] omnipotent is insane to me.

It's all a show. Performative. Look how good our family is! We're seen at church! Did you notice Sally wasnt here today? We'd never miss church! We are the bestest of the best!

Anonymous wrote:I'm not threatened by those who hate Christians and the comments intended to insult me dont bother me. All Christians are accustomed to some level of persecution. This question was not for you and I respect that you choose to raise your family is different from mine.

I think I have a way forward so DC may continue sports. I'll discuss with DH and DC. Thank you everyone.

Oh wow, really? The good ole victim mentality again?

No wonder there's so many "haters" when christians say sh*t like this

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you allowing your daughter to do activities on sunday but not your son? You won't change your schedule because it messes up DDs activities but you DGAF about DS sports? Why is DDs so much more important?

DDs activity is year round and was prearranged around church. We've been able to do Saturdays or Sunday afternoon as well for DC for a while but as he's advanced and wanting to be with friends, it's now overlapped with Sunday mornings pretty regularly. DC is evolving with his dedication to his sport and his unwillingness to attend church and I'm trying to tread carefully so he has a say in how he spends his time without compromising his relationship with God.

I really hope you don't use the term "his relationship with God" around your teen. You sound reasonable, but when you use that phrase it makes me think you are a little out there in terms of religion and your teen probably senses that as well.

Out of curiosity, what do you think religion is? For me the core of religion is a relationship with God. I don’t love all the personal Jesus stuff from a while back, but prayer, church, almsgiving, doing good works… the tenets of faith, they are building blocks in my relationship with God.

I think it is a useful set of ethics and morals to lead a good life. What you describe above doesn't sound at all like a "relationship with God"...which again, I don't understand the term and a teen that is already questioning much of this, doesn't understand either. Unless you are willing to be OK with your teen saying their relationship with God is weak or non-existent which I doubt anyone using that term is willing to accept.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you allowing your daughter to do activities on sunday but not your son? You won't change your schedule because it messes up DDs activities but you DGAF about DS sports? Why is DDs so much more important?

DDs activity is year round and was prearranged around church. We've been able to do Saturdays or Sunday afternoon as well for DC for a while but as he's advanced and wanting to be with friends, it's now overlapped with Sunday mornings pretty regularly. DC is evolving with his dedication to his sport and his unwillingness to attend church and I'm trying to tread carefully so he has a say in how he spends his time without compromising his relationship with God.

I really hope you don't use the term "his relationship with God" around your teen. You sound reasonable, but when you use that phrase it makes me think you are a little out there in terms of religion and your teen probably senses that as well.

Out of curiosity, what do you think religion is? For me the core of religion is a relationship with God. I don’t love all the personal Jesus stuff from a while back, but prayer, church, almsgiving, doing good works… the tenets of faith, they are building blocks in my relationship with God.

Anonymous wrote:Forced religion is insane to me.

Organizing a whole family’s life around sports is insane to me.

When it’s part of who you are, your community and your values, it’s not insane at all. Don’t cast aspersions because it isn’t part of who you are or you don’t understand it.

Forced religion is insane to me.

OP, we’re in a similar boat. This is the first year we’ve had a lot of sports conflicts on Sunday. We’re a go every week to church family. And frankly, if I gave my kid a choice, she’d never go. What kid wants to go to church? I never did, but guess what? My dad taught Sunday school for years and my mom was Sunday school director for years and out butts were in church every Sunday for years, practically year round. I’m not a zealot and I don’t resent it. I did leave it for awhile in college (I feel like that’s normal…? I also didn’t have a car, so no way to get there for awhile but I did miss it).

That being said, with my own kid, sometimes we will split it up….we’ll go to a game and miss church; the next time it happens, we’ll go to church and miss the game. She seems ok with this and the coach knows why we’re missing. We’re not the only ones who do this. I swear, some of you people spewing all the hate 🤦🏻‍♀️

Religion is important to us but so is the sport she’s chosen so we make it work the best we can. If she’s plays at a higher level, we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.

I’m not even religious but I find it paradoxical that some people here are talking about indoctrination by religion, while in every other thread in the teens forum it seems that organized sports are the institutions that are controlling American families’ lives: posts about family dinners? Limited because sports. Reasonable bedtimes for teens? Nope, sports+schoolwork. Alternatives for exploring other interests (ej the post about scouts)? Nope, sports. Of course being physically active is good, but some families but I think it’s time to reclaim free time both for teens and parents.

It’s time, OP.

My mother forced church every single week, rain, shine, if we were sick (I have vomited in church more times than I care to remember), no matter what else we might have had going on, if I babysat late the night before my rear end was in that pew at 7am, etc. Also for every holy day of obligation and many days that weren’t obligated. If you lived in her house you were at church. Eventually she gave into begging that allowed us to choose which mass instead of 7am. I was a lector, president of the youth group, ran the stations of the cross, volunteered at every event, etc. I promptly stopped going to church the moment I left home. I returned to it on my own in grad school, but not every week. And I’ve mostly remained that way through adulthood. My spouse is in the you must be there every week camp. Our kids attend Catholic school (newly this year) and they have every other week school mass and they’ve started putting up a fight hardcore on those weeks because they don’t want to go twice in a week (I don’t blame them!) and it became a big fight between them and my spouse. I think we’ve mostly worked it out where we go every other week now, which suits my preferences fine and my spouse can of course attend as he pleases. All that to say, I think forcing the issue is the fastest way to turn them off totally.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop trying to indoctrinate your kid.

Let them play sports and get exercise better for their brain cells.

If you raised an intelligent kid they will leave the church anyway.

Exactly. I PURPOSELY did not baptize my kids and have told them since an early age they can pick their own religion or none at all and I will support them either way.

So sick of the families forcing their beliefs onto their children.

The open displays of hated toward Christianity are appalling.

Do you hate Islam and Judaism as much?

If only there were words to describe people who hate Judaism. Or Islam. Or christianity.

Yes. Yes, I do.

And its ok to condemn organizations that do more harm than good

Go back to Off Topic, where you incessantly remind people to say “holiday” instead of Christmas, you troll.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop trying to indoctrinate your kid.

Let them play sports and get exercise better for their brain cells.

If you raised an intelligent kid they will leave the church anyway.

Exactly. I PURPOSELY did not baptize my kids and have told them since an early age they can pick their own religion or none at all and I will support them either way.

So sick of the families forcing their beliefs onto their children.

The open displays of hated toward Christianity are appalling.

Do you hate Islam and Judaism as much?

If only there were words to describe people who hate Judaism. Or Islam. Or christianity.

It’s just bizarre that someone can read a question obviously targeted towards the religious and yet come in a thread to denigrate the sincerely held beliefs of others. Do those posters honestly think people will read comments like that and change their minds?

I won't denigrate sincerely held belief of others (my parents) but will tell you in my experience being forced to go to church pushed me away from religion forever.