Anonymous
Post 02/26/2024 13:02     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:
On Tuesday, my son’s two closest friends at school told him that he was “forbidden” from playing with them anymore because he “liked boys instead of girls.” My son has crushes on girls and is not homosexual, but they said that because of his clothes, they could tell he only liked boys.

My son tried to speak with the vice principal and the school counselor, but neither had time for him. He was distraught. I emailed to see if he could please speak with the school counselor.

On Wednesday, he met with the counselor, who suggested that he use “I statements” to tell his friends how he felt when they made those comments. My son tried it, but was met with ridicule.

I asked the counselor to please meet with the two boys who told my son he was homosexual and excluded him for it, and to meet with all three of them and mediate a conversation between the three of them. I also asked the counselor to follow up with me.

So far, no response from the counselor.

Any suggestions? Is this kind of teasing tolerated by FCPS? I thought the school would have stepped in.

This entire situation strikes as odd to me, particularly the "instead of girls" aspect. Do boys in 5th grade even understand or care about the distinction between straight and homosexual? I've never come across a single instance where either of my boys, when they were in 5th grade, made any comments suggesting that their "friends should like girls or else". Boys can be bullied for various reasons, and the school should take disciplinary action. But why would two boys insist that your son needs to like girls? Perhaps they each have a crush on different girls, and when your son was asked about his crush, he refused to pick a girl?
Anonymous
Post 02/25/2024 11:28     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sad to say, but he might want to wear different clothes. I have a nephew who his fashionable mom has always dressed him like a little . . . sorry, gay man. Fitted pants rolled up at the ankles, loafer with no socks, bow ties and bowler hats. He was super cute, yes. And he loved the attention. But now, in school, all he was getting is a very negative kind of attention for how he dresses. His younger brother has always refused to dress like that as if sensing early on nothing good comes from it. Hoodies and running shoes for him. Older brother is morphing as well. But it's been painful.


My son wears jeans, sneakers, t-shirts and a turtleneck under the t-shirts in the winter, just like his friends. It has nothing to do with how he dresses.


Turtleneck?
Anonymous
Post 02/25/2024 07:53     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
I would move DC to a different school to get a fresh start, either within FCPS or elsewhere.
Anonymous
Post 02/24/2024 17:45     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:Can we all just agree the clothing is irrelevant because people should be able to wear whatever they want and not be bullied about it?

Unfortunately, we live in the real world not a fantasy world.

Dressing your male kid in a preppy style will get him bullied and called gay in the majority of public schools in this area. That’s cause, on average, only gay kids or kids dressed by their moms know how to dress well.
Anonymous
Post 02/24/2024 16:33     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:Can we all just agree the clothing is irrelevant because people should be able to wear whatever they want and not be bullied about it?


Of course they should, but unfortunately this is now how kids work or adults for that matter. Adults generally won’t bully you about it though.
Anonymous
Post 02/24/2024 16:17     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Maybe better to teach your son to stand up for himself, because unfortunately bullying will happen till he grownup
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2024 12:59     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:Can we all just agree the clothing is irrelevant because people should be able to wear whatever they want and not be bullied about it?


This seriously. Maybe OP’s son likes his clothes! She can offer to buy him new ones if he doesn’t but that’s a side issue. The problem is kids excluding other kids based on what they’re wearing and their perceived sexual orientation and the message should be that such exclusion is bad, not your child’s clothing is bad.
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2024 12:54     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:Can we all just agree the clothing is irrelevant because people should be able to wear whatever they want and not be bullied about it?


I agree but it happens. My daughter dresses very masculine she was bullied about it. She also wears a lot of baggy clothes. Hasn't changed her style one bit.
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2024 11:30     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Can we all just agree the clothing is irrelevant because people should be able to wear whatever they want and not be bullied about it?
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2024 09:34     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:My son goes to public and doesn’t wear athletic wear. He wears cargo pants usually.


Is he athletic? My DS plays a lot of sports and runs around a lot with the other boys from his teams at recess. I spend a lot of time hosting play dates and carpooling these kids around and they’re all dressed like they’re ready to throw around a football at any moment. I dress my kid so he can be active.
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2024 09:14     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Ok what her kid is wearing sadly can lead to bullying. We know a kid that would wear turtlenecks and a beret. We were wondering if his mom was actively trying to get him bullied?

Most kids are wearing tshirts, shorts or athletic pants in the later grades of ES. No jacket or maybe light hoodie with temps in low 20s. I’d change the way you dress him and have him get new friends. But move on.

If they aren’t bullying him everyday and have just stopped playing with him it’s no longer an issue. Kids stop being friends all the time for all sorts of stupid reasons. As long as they are not actively calling him names or spreading rumors does it matter they don’t want to play with him. Find new friends.
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2024 08:45     Subject: 5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Do you live under a rock or something? Every boy older than like 7 years old that I have seen around northern Virginia wears athletic pants as the PP described above. They will wear nicer pants when the occasion calls for it, but to school and for everyday wear it’s sweatpants.


Maybe in public school.


Did you read the title of the forum? This post is in the FCPS forum. No one cares what your kid wears to a private school with a dress code. The norms are entirely different when kids are limited in the types of clothing allowed. I went to a school with a dress code and we dressed completely differently than kids at public school. Stop commenting if you have no relevant experience. Normal kids in FCPS wear athletic clothing because it’s comfortable. Your opinion on that does not matter whatsoever. It’s fact.
Anonymous
Post 02/23/2024 08:39     Subject: Re:5th grade boy teased for being homosexual, even though he isn’t homosexual
Anonymous wrote:He should make new friend and tell them the boys are dating and they don’t like a 3rd wheel.

If they ask if he said it say yea, I thought they were dating. My bad.


Might be best option.

Or punch one of them in the mouth :shrug: