Anonymous wrote:MIL is NOT "Mom." I love her. But not in our family, we only have one Mom and one Dad each.
Anonymous wrote:If you're speaking about your parents, you would say, "Dad came for over yesterday." I don't get Op's post. Why would I need to say "my" Dad. Of course it's my Dad. Why would I be talking about someone else's Dad? and use the word "Dad."
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My husband (MY husband) says I do this when talking to him about my parents and it bothers him. I don't realize I do it, don't mean imply my mom is THEE Mom or HIS mom. What a heavy conversational burden for him to bear.
Outside the (supposed) comfort of my marriage I thought I had more effective use of possessives but now I'm spiraling.
Do you call his mom your mom also? Otherwise it's like your mom is THE mom, the only mom. It's just your mom, not his mom. I only do this with my siblings because she is our mom, not with my husband though. He has his own mom.
Anonymous wrote:OP again. I think it sounds self-centered and juvenile. Like they are not aware that THEIR mom isn’t “Mom” to everyone they are talking to. My children probably referred to me as “Mom” when talking to other people when she was 2 because to her it was my whole identity. But by the time she was 3 she was aware that most people also have someone they call “Mom,” so she switched to “my mom” when referring to me. I think adults who have never made that switch have some peculiar perspective-taking flaw going on.
Anonymous wrote:This is one of the most petty posts I’ve seen on the family relationship forum in a long time, and that’s saying a lot.
Anonymous wrote:My husband (MY husband) says I do this when talking to him about my parents and it bothers him. I don't realize I do it, don't mean imply my mom is THEE Mom or HIS mom. What a heavy conversational burden for him to bear.
Outside the (supposed) comfort of my marriage I thought I had more effective use of possessives but now I'm spiraling.